Life Parallel
by Twidmo
Summary: Off-canon; set immediately following the vote on Bella's mortality. If you haven't read Take Me As I Am at least through "The Vote," go back and read that first. Christopher leaves for Ithaca as planned, but when he gets a call telling him to get off the plane, everything changes. Sexual Content, Lemons. I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT
1. Never Leave You

_**A/N: **_

_**So, the idea for this occurred to me as I re-read the end of New Moon while revising TMAIA, and I decided to see what happened if Chris and Ellie were set on a bit of a different course, all because Edward screws up again.**_

_**I don't know how long this will be, but I will be updating simultaneously while I edit and post SoG.**_

_**Note: I will be alternating between Chris and Ellie's POV in this one. Sorrynotsorry.**_

* * *

**EPOV**

"I have to get ready to go," he said in a hushed voice after he finally pulled away. I nodded sadly.

"I will drive you if you want." He shook his head.

"I asked your dad if he would." He kissed me again, amused by my puzzled expression. "Hush. I would like you to pick me up when I return if that's okay." He dressed and grabbed his bag, taking my face in his hands. "I love you and I will be back soon."

"I love you. Be safe," I responded, willing my eyes to stay dry.

"I'll call you when I land." He kissed me quickly and then was gone.

I tried to go back to sleep after I heard the car pull away from the house. I tossed and turned alone in the bed, missing the feel of his arms around me. I felt warmer, safer, when he was with me; and there was a gnawing anxiety growing in my belly at his absence, though I knew without a doubt that he would return to me. It was this realization - the utter confidence I had in his commitment to me, and mine to him, which finally allowed my troubled mind to settle down enough to dose.

* * *

**ChPOV**

When you're accustomed to not being able to truly forget things, you occasionally marvel over the minute details of every day that seem to slip past you unnoticed. I sat on the plane that would be soon be bound for Syracuse on my way back to Ithaca, watching everyone around me begin to shut down their various devices and fidget nervously in their seats. All the while never remembering that my own phone was still on in my pocket.

Granted, I had been extremely distracted since leaving Ellie's father's car. I had barely been aware of moving through the security checkpoint and reaching my gate; such was my relief and elation following my conversation with Carlisle on the drive to the airport. He'd given me his blessing to marry his daughter - the only child he and his wife had truly raised from infancy - without a second's hesitation.

Shortly before the jet began its taxi away from the gate, my phone rang urgently in my pocket. Ignoring the silent, scolding, glare of the attendant, I answered right away.

"Christopher," gasped Alice on the other end of the line. "Get off the plane now. I'm sending Rosalie to pick you up; she will explain everything. Ellie is fine but she needs you."

"Sir." The irritated flight attendant leaned over my seat as the line went dead. "Sir, you must turn that off now. We are about to take off."

I stood up at once, starting to push past her.

"Sir! Please take your seat!"

"I'm sorry," I said tersely as I reached for my carryon, "I need to get off of this plane."

"We are about to take off," she snapped. "I have to ask you to sit down. Now."

"Damn it, let me off of the plane," I ordered, struggling to remain calm.

Alice's voice echoed in my head. She needs you.

I took a deep breath and turned to face the attendant. "I'm sorry. There's an emergency," I pleaded. "Please. I need to get back to my wife." I knew the word wasn't technically accurate, but a part of me thrilled to say it aloud anyway. I couldn't think of another way to adequately express to the angry human in front of me the significance of the woman I needed to get back to. Girlfriend was laughable, and mate wouldn't have the same meaning to them. As I spoke, I fixed the most penetrating gaze I could muster in my frazzled state, willing this flight attendant to cooperate.

Her eyes widened and she appeared stunned, just as one of her male crew members joined us in the center aisle to see what the fuss was about. She turned to him, gesturing for him to let me through.

"We need to let him off before we depart."

Minutes later I was racing through the airport; or at least that's how it appeared to the humans around me. I briefly considered running full speed – I would be barely visible to the few weary travelers stumbling through the terminal – but it wouldn't do to cause a scene now. Not when she needed me.

Rosalie was already waiting for me in her flashy red BMW, as promised, and she tore away from the airport as soon as I shut the door.

"Rose, please. What's happened?" I begged when she didn't speak. "What's wrong with Ellie?"

Rose gave a hard laugh and shook her head. "Ellie's fine; for now anyway. She's better than the rest of us since she doesn't even know what's going on."

Her vague response was little comfort. "Rose," I repeated. "I don't know anything either and in case you couldn't tell I'm kind of freaking out. What happened?"

She sighed; eyeing my hand as I gripped the handle of the passenger door so hard it trembled. "Christopher? Do you mind?" I released the handle, curling my hand into a fist and resting it on my thigh.

"Rosalie," I spat, I couldn't stand her silence anymore.

"It's Edward. Or really Bella, I guess." She rolled her eyes. "Always the problem, isn't she?"

"What about her?" My confusion started to overrule my panic, but only slightly.

"There's a war coming. Edward bit her. The wolves are coming for us – or at least they will be very soon."

Her words fell over us like a heavy curtain. I understood the significance of the treaty, Carlisle had already explained it to me. I didn't understand how things had changed so quickly after Bella's visit to the house only a few hours ago. As if reading my thoughts, Rosalie answered them quietly.

"He was too thirsty. He lost control. The idiot should have hunted before hauling her away from the house," she sneered. "Anyway, It was Alice that saved her – she saw in time to send Carlisle." She shook her head again, her blonde hair shifting gracefully over her shoulders. "After everything they've been through, he nearly kills her himself."

"My god," I mumbled when my shock waned enough to speak. "Ellie will be a mess worrying about them."

"Yes," Rose agreed. "She will. But that's not all Alice saw before the visions went blank."

"What?" I asked wearily. What else could possible be about to go wrong?

She faced me, smiling sadly. "You have to take Ellie away. Tonight. As far as you can get from us."

I stared at her, barely comprehending her words. "What do you mean?"

"Christopher. Bella is changing. She's going to wake up in Alaska three days from now a newborn. Ellie's only ever been around mature, controlled vampires. We never thought it would be an issue once Bella was changed - Ellie's never even bothered Jasper."

"Oh god..." I could see the scene forming as she explained. Bella out of control and raging with thirst for human blood; but only allowed to drink from animals.

"Alice tried to see it differently. She made a hundred different decisions; keeping Ellie constantly surrounded by you, Carlisle and Esme, the Denalis. It didn't matter. Bella would overpower all at some point."

"No," I gasped. I knew what she would tell me next.

"And then, if Ellie...died," she choked on the word in a rare display of emotion, "you would try to kill Bella. That was what horrified Alice the most. Not that you would try, but that you and Edward would likely kill each other first." I swallowed roughly as my imagination illustrated her words.

I closed my eyes, struggling to control myself; we were nearly at the house now. "How long do we have?"

"Everything disappears at dawn. Carlisle is already gone, driving Edward and Bella to our old house in Alaska. It's further north than the Denali's, more remote. The rest of us are leaving as soon as we get back – we need to get there before she wakes. You and Ellie must be gone by sunrise Christopher."

I looked at my watch. It was just after midnight now. Sunrise would be shortly after six am. That gave us only a few hours to prepare for our evacuation.

We walked into the house without another word; the sullen faces of Ellie's mother and brothers greeted us silently. Alice hovered nearby, clutching her head, appearing intently focused on something only she could see.

I panicked a little when I didn't see Ellie standing with them. "She's sleeping, Chris," Jasper whispered. "She doesn't know anything yet."

"Right," I said with a sigh. "Rose said that. Sorry, I forgot for a second."

He nodded and stood before Esme. "We need to go now," he said gently with his soft southern drawl. "He will take care of her."

Her eyes met mine, begging me to make the promise myself. "I will, Esme. I swear it. I will keep her safe."

A small sob escaped her mouth and I at once regretted the implication that they could not keep her safe; though it was apparently true all the same. Esme locked her arms around my neck.

"Thank you, Christopher. Thank you." She pulled back and placed a hand lightly on my cheek. "And you have my blessing, too," she added so quietly I almost missed it. I smiled a little, squeezing her other hand once before nodding to her anxious children.

"Go. We will let you know once we are settled," I said, glancing at each of them.

"Where are you taking her?" Esme asked.

"Back to New York for now," I answered without thinking. "We will decide together if we go elsewhere later."

Esme nodded once, and then suddenly I was alone, with only the sounds of cars driving away outside and my mate's soft breathing upstairs.

I knew I needed to wake her soon - I wanted us to be gone long before sunrise just to be safe; but I put it off for as long as I could. I slipped upstairs to get her car keys, shoving them in my pocket as I looked over her sleeping form. She would be so confused to find me here, and I fully expected a furious tirade when she realized that her family had ordered me to keep her away from them. An involuntary shudder ripped through me as I recalled the reasons why.

I forced myself to look away, searching for the suitcase that she'd barely unpacked from the Denali trip. I dug around her belongings and threw a few more items in; though I knew she had clothes back in Ithaca as well. I grabbed a couple things for myself as well and loaded the trunk. When I walked back inside, I noticed for the first time how unnaturally dark it was, even for the middle of the night. I realized that the glass window that extended along the entire back of the house was now covered by huge plates of metal.

Wondering idly if we would ever even be able to return to this place, I slowly climbed the stairs back to Ellie's room. I felt a pang of remorse when I thought of how excited she had been to think of this as our room. I vowed to do whatever I could to make her happy during this separation from all she's known before. Out of this we would build our life. Together.

* * *

**EPOV**

Considering that I was raised in a family of never aging, and supposedly never changing, immortal beings, it was amazing how accustomed I had become to constant uproar.

Even before the continuous drama brought by Bella Swan's entrance into our lives, there had been the occasional lightening-fast moves throughout my childhood; either because I had a freakish growth spurt and was in danger of being noticed; or because some slipped up, leaving too much to chance to remain where we were. I had always been told that these things would happen sometimes, but not to worry. My family would always be there with me; wherever 'there' was. I had fallen asleep that night with a sense of peace and relief that we were once again settled; home.

As I slept, my dreams were unusually pleasant. I didn't dream every night, but when I did they were usually loud, bright, and violent. On this night I dreamed simply of the utter peace I felt in Christopher's presence; even in my sleep I found this strange since I knew he wasn't there. I could even here his voice, faintly calling my name, and feel his hands stroking my skin.

Suddenly, the calm atmosphere of my subconscious shifted. I could feel a dark tension seeping into my mind; Christopher's voice was still there but it was sharper, more urgent, and much, much, closer. I woke with a start, scrambling back against the headboard when I realized he was really there, kneeling beside the bed.

"Christopher?!" I gasped, my surprise turning to elation as I reached out for him. "What are you doing here?" He didn't answer at first, struggling to control his thoughts. I finally saw the stress in his eyes. "Baby, what is it? What's wrong? Are you okay? Why aren't you on your flight?" My questions flew out of my mouth in one breath; he smiled softly and cupped my cheek but did not speak.

"You're scaring me, Chris," I whispered, realizing for the first time how silent the rest of the house was. My breathing started to speed up. "Please. What's going on?"

When he finally spoke, his words didn't make sense to me. "We have to leave, Ellie. We don't have much time before the wolves come for us."

"The wolves?!" I cried. "Oh my god. Did they attack? Is someone hurt?"

He shook his head. "No honey. They haven't attacked; but they will. I'm not sure how they will find out so soon, but Alice was certain they would."

It still didn't make sense to me. "Christopher, how. The treaty…"

His mouth turned down into a frown. "Edward broke the treaty tonight," he said gravely. "He bit Bella."

"What?! Why? It was decided..." I grabbed his shoulders. "Christopher, is Bella...?"

He scooped me up and sat down on the bed with me in his lap. "She's changing," he whispered. "She will survive." He kissed my head. "I promise I will tell you everything but we need to go now." He swallowed, his voice shaking a little as he spoke. "Do you trust me?"

"Yes, of course," I answered without hesitation.

"Okay," he said with a resigned sigh. "Get dressed. We are leaving in two minutes."

Ninety seconds later, I was locking the front door. The reality that this might actually be the last time I leave this house – ever – was starting to dawn on me. My hand shook as I pulled the key from the lock. Chris led me to the car, his eyes darting around anxiously as if he were expecting the wolves to appear right that second.

He didn't speak as he drove; he was trying to control his thoughts before he explained whatever the rest of the story was. I tried to tune him out, watching the trees pass along the highway.

"Where did they take her?" I asked him quietly an hour or so later when the silence started to bug me.

He shifted anxiously in his seat. "Alaska."

I frowned. I knew the route to Alaska from Forks, but this was not it. We' had just merged onto Interstate 90. "Then why are we still headed east, Christopher?" He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, and I suddenly realized that he very deliberately didn't explain everything until he had me safely situated in the car. "Christopher," I repeated his name sharply. "Where are we going? What is going on?" The edge in my voice made him cringe, but his thoughts slipped just enough that I knew he'd been expecting that.

"We're not going to meet your family Ellie. For the moment at least we are going back to New York."

I still didn't understand. "So you can deal with your loose ends?" I asked, thinking back to his explanation of his plans to return to New York tonight.

A hard chuckle escaped his lips, and he squeezed the steering wheel. "No, sweetheart. I mean, maybe, once we figure out what we want to do. We don't have to stay there if you don't want to. But we can't go back to your family. Not for a while at least." He looked over at me, his eyes begging me to understand. "It's not safe for you."

Suddenly, his mind cleared to me and he showed me everything – the terse phone call from Alice; the dispute on the plane when he needed to get off; Rosalie's explanation.

My hands gripped the seat as I took it all in. I felt myself go completely pale as I saw what he'd imagined. My lifeless, blood soaked body, and my family split trying to hold Christopher back from killing Bella, and Edward back from killing Christopher.

"Oh my god," I choked. I felt tears dripping off of my cheeks. "How? I didn't think that I smelled...that way...to you guys." He reached for my hand.

"You don't. But she will be new, and she will be cut off from the one thing she will want desperately. You don't smell human to me, love, but there's no denying the blood in your veins. She won't be able to make that distinction."

"But surely there's some way..."

"Ellie," he cut me off sharply. "Please. I promised your mother I would keep you safe. As long as Alice sees even the slightest risk to you, we will be far, far away from Bella."

I pulled my feet up onto the seat, wrapping my arms around my knees and holding them to my chest. I didn't say anything else to him; I just closed my eyes and leaned my head back, not even bothering to hide my tears. I could hear his concern in his thoughts - he worried that I was angry with him, but mostly he worried that I was hurting. I didn't have the strength to reassure him. If I were honest with myself, I would probably have to admit that I was a little angry with him for not giving me a choice. But then I could see the way his mind envisioned what Alice predicted and I knew I couldn't stay angry. The mere suggestion that I might be in danger terrified him.

After a few hours of silence, I reached for his hand, which was resting on the gearshift. He was so lost in his own thoughts he jumped a little at my touch.

"Sorry," I whispered. He gave me a half smile and linked his fingers through mine.

"I love you," he said. "I am sorry about all of this. If I thought there was another way...that you would be safe..."

I shook my head. "No, Chris, don't. This isn't your fault. I don't know what I would do without you right now." I broke down with this admission; I felt utterly abandoned by my entire family in that moment. I didn't care that it was selfish as tears poured from my eyes.

Christopher jerked the wheel without warning, swerving the car onto the shoulder and taking me in his arms. "You will never be alone, Ellie. I will never leave you. Not ever. I swear it." He held me while I cried and his mind repeated this mantra over and over. It was several minutes before my tears began to slow; when he let me pull back from him, his shirt was soaked.

I sucked in a deep breath and took his hands. "I'm sorry," I gasped. "I'm still processing this. I hope you know that I want nothing more than to be with you, but I've never been separated from my family like this. It's a little scary." I cringed, looking up at him through my lashes. The understanding in his eyes made my chest ache.

He pressed a gentle kiss to my lips. "I know," he said. "And I will do whatever I can to make this easier for you. We can build our life together, and then when things settle down..."

"How long, do you think? I know they say the first year is the worst but..." I bit my lip.

"Honestly I don't know, honey," he said, sitting back against his seat as he thought. "I haven't been around many new immortals. Hell, even my creator didn't really stick around too long to explain it all to me." He laughed darkly at this. "Of course, I had very little need to be controlled at first because it was a time of war. The blood shed was tremendous..." He shivered a little at the memories.

"But when could you be around humans without...?" I didn't know how to finish my question.

"Within a few years it was significantly easier," he said with a shrug. He looked over at me and took in my horrified expression.

"Years," I mumbled.

His right hand covered my left. "I know our perspectives are a little different here, love, but try to believe me when I say it was nothing in the long run." He leaned in to kiss me again. His lips were soothing on mine; I leaned into him eagerly, soaking up the comfort he offered. He pulled back with effort, leaning his forehead against mine, and cupping my cheek in his hand. "We should keep moving, Ellie. I don't know how far out the pack will be hunting for us."

I swallowed loudly, my heart still hammering in my chest from his kiss. I nodded. "I'd almost forgotten that part," I whispered. "I'm sorry your life has turned completely upside down."

He sighed; his breath was sweet on my face. "Stop. I don't want a life that doesn't have you. Whatever else comes we can deal with, okay?"

I kissed him once more. "Okay."


	2. Decisions

**ChPOV**

Ellie fell asleep several hours later. I had to watch my speed more carefully without her useful talent to forewarn me of any lurking police on the road; it was frustrating to stall progress this way but it wasn't worth the drama of a traffic stop, and she needed rest. Several times along the way I contemplated finding a hotel in whatever city we were near, knowing she would fare better with a full night's sleep in a bed. But still I pressed on, eager to reach our destination.

I thought about what we might do once we returned to New York. The second half of the spring semester would be resuming in just a few days, and I wondered whether it was worth staying at least through the end of the term, rather than uproot Ellie again to start over right away. I wanted to make a real life with her, but I wouldn't be able to continue teaching at Cornell and have a public relationship with my student – even if she switched out of my program.

I decided that once we had gotten settled, and she'd had a chance to rest properly, we would have a frank discussion about what we should do. We didn't need to go back to Cornell, but I knew she might find comfort in resuming a familiar routine. She stirred beside me and my eyes flicked automatically toward her, expecting to find her still fast asleep. Her eyes were wide open and staring at me – she'd been listening to my internal debate.

"Hi," I whispered. I had been so absorbed I hadn't noticed the change in her heart rate or breathing, the tell tale signs that she was nearly awake. She smiled tenderly.

"Hi. I'm sorry, I should have said something," she said. I shook my head.

"No, no. It's fine. I was just thinking about what we should do when we get there. I didn't really think much about it when your mother asked where we would go, to be honest. I just decided to come back here because it seemed the easiest thing to do." I shrugged. "We don't have to stay if you don't want to. I can still leave my position and we can move on." I said all of this very quickly, anxious now to hear what she thought.

She reached out and took my hand. "Christopher, it's okay. I actually think maybe we should just go on like we were until the semester ends. I don't want to pretend not to be with you any longer than I have to, but won't it make it easier for you to get a job somewhere else if you don't leave mid-term?"

I nodded thoughtfully. "It will; that's certainly true. I've been at Cornell for a few years, and it's not uncommon for young faculty," I winked at her, "to shift around to a few places before seeking tenure."

"It's settled then. We will go back on Monday and stay through the end of the semester," she said. She flashed a smile, but it didn't quite reach her eyes.

"Ellie, are you sure?" I asked her, looking over at her and reaching for her face. "We can do this however you want." I didn't want her to do something solely because she thought it was easier for me.

She sighed and leaned into my palm. "I don't really know what else to do, Chris. You were right before, I think, when you were thinking it might be easier to go back to a familiar routine? And it is easier for you – you just said that. If it makes it easier for you to find another position then that will make it easier for us to settle in a new place later right?"

I nodded, rubbing her cheek with my thumb. "Okay."

She took my hand back in hers and held it in her lap. "As long as I have you I have everything I need Chris," she said.

"I told you, I'm not going to anywhere, love," I said as my gaze shifted back toward the road. "Not without you."

* * *

**EPOV**

I managed to stay awake for the rest of the drive to New York. When we were just outside of Syracuse and about to begin heading south toward Ithaca, I reached into my purse and pulled out my phone.

"What are you doing, love?" The car slowed considerably, the morning traffic stalling our progress.

I shrugged. "Just checking to see if anyone has called or anything."

"And?"

"Nope," I bit my lip to contain a sigh. I had hoped to hear from at least one of my parents by now. "Do you think she's come out of it yet?"

Chris looked at the clock and thought back over the last two days. "I would expect," he said slowly, "that she won't come around until at least tonight."

"Huh," I murmured. "Guess they've just been busy."

"Why don't you try calling your mom? We're close enough to Ithaca by now, and I told her we would check in."

I dialed my mother's phone, and it rang several times. I expected it to go to her voicemail before I heard her voice.

"Ellie, sweetie, I'm so glad you called. How are you?"

"Um, we are fine," I replied, adding quickly, "I'm fine. We are nearly to Ithaca."

"You made good time," she said idly.

"Yeah, I guess so. How is everything there?" I wanted to ask about Edward but I wasn't sure how much she could say or who was around.

"Things are...progressing," she said carefully. Everyone was with her then. I glanced over at Chris and he was watching me intently; we were all but stopped in traffic.

"So, is she going to be okay?" I asked quietly. Mom was quiet for a minute, and I heard people arguing in the background. "Mom? What's going on?"

"Sweetie, I'm sorry," she said wearily, sighing. "I really have to go. I love you. Give our love to Christopher as well."

"Okay b—" The line went dead, cutting me off. I pulled the phone from my ear and stared at the screen until the call cleared out. "I didn't even get to finish saying goodbye," I mumbled as I shoved the phone back into my purse.

"What happened?" he asked, though I knew he heard just as much as I did.

"I don't know. There was some scuffling in the background. I think it was Edward and Jasper." I took a deep breath and looked out the windshield, forcing a smile when I saw that we were only a few miles out from the house now.

Christopher reached over and squeezed my knee. "You will hear from them again soon, honey. They love you."

I tried to remember that as each day passed without a word. It was a week before I heard from anyone in the family. I resisted the urge to call between classes several times over the days that followed our return to Ithaca. I knew that by then Bella would have awoken and they surely had their hands full. Still, I had hoped that someone would find a minute or two to make sure that I was still okay.

Christopher's patience was unending even when I complained at least once a day about how disorienting it was not to know what was happening in Alaska.

"Sweetheart," he said soothingly, pulling me into his arms one night, "I'm sorry. I know this is difficult. I wish I could make this easier for you."

I let him lead me to the couch and pull me into his lap, stroking my hair and kissing my head. I sighed and relaxed against his chest. "Was it really only a few weeks ago that you first brought me here?" I asked quietly, twisting to see his face. He smiled and kissed my lips.

"It was," he murmured, his lips still moving against mine. "It doesn't seem that way, though, does it?"

"Mmm," I murmured my agreement, shifting in his lap to face him. "It really doesn't." I returned his kiss in earnest, sighing as I felt his hands move down past my shoulders. His fingers spread out across my back, holding me firmly against him. I knew he was seconds away from picking me up and carrying me upstairs, and I kissed him harder, letting him know that was exactly what I wanted.

Before he could put his thought into action, my cell phone rang shrilly from the kitchen. When I didn't move to answer it, he groaned and pushed me back.

"You should answer that, Ellie," he whispered, holding me at arms length. I nodded and climbed out of his lap, darting to grab the phone from the counter before the caller gave up.

"Hello?" I gasped, struggling to settle my breathing. I turned and leaned with my lower back against the counter.

"Ellie," my sister's voice chirped. "I'm sorry, am I interrupting?"

"Alice!" I cried, unable to contain my excitement to hear her voice. "I'm so glad you called!"

She snorted. "Are you sure about that?"

I smacked my forehead. "Oh geez, Alice. How are you? What's going on up there?" She hesitated; I pressed. "Alice?" Christopher appeared in the doorway when he heard the slight stress in my voice.

"Everything's fine, Ellie, don't freak out," she scoffed. "Or at least it's as fine as can be expected."

"Okay, what does that mean? How's Bella? How's Edward?"

"Edward is…well, he will be fine," she said vaguely. "Bella is a newborn, so she is doing as well as we could hope. She's…um…struggling. But there are moments of calm."

I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck. "I will be honest, I don't really know what you mean, Alice."

I could almost hear her smile. "I know, Ellie. Let's just say we made a good decision making sure you didn't come here. Bella will be fine – I've actually seen that. I just can't tell you if it's six months from now or three years from now. It's…frustrating." I knew what she was telling me. I needed to sit tight because I would be separated from them for a while. "Listen, Ellie, I know you are feeling frustrated yourself, what with the lack of communication. Carlisle and Esme have spent nearly ever moment this past week with Edward and Bella. They both really need that support right now. So just try to remember that if you can't reach us as often as you like, okay? I'm sorry. I know this sucks for you."

Christopher was beside me now, having seen the tears gathering in my eyes. He wrapped his arms around me, pressing his chest against my left shoulder and tucking my head under his chin. I sniffed and scrubbed my hand against my eyes.

"Okay Alice, I understand," I whispered.

"They miss you too, Ellie. They will try to come see you as soon as they can, okay?"

This made me feel a bit better, though I knew that was probably months off. "Okay."

"You're in good hands out there anyway," she added smugly, and Christopher chuckled, kissing the top of my head. "Tell him I'm watching him, though, okay?"

I laughed at this. "Okay, Alice."

* * *

**ChPOV**

As Ellie disappeared into the kitchen to answer her phone, I leaned my head against the back of the couch, taking a few deep breaths to calm myself down. Despite the timing of the call, I was glad to hear Alice's voice on the other end of the line. I knew Ellie felt disconnected and even ostracized from her family since our return to Ithaca, though she tried to keep her venting to a minimum. So afraid was she that I would take her expressions of frustration as a sign that she didn't want to be with me – regardless of how many times I told her I knew that wasn't the case. I only hoped that this call wouldn't leave her feeling even more lost once Alice said goodbye.

In truth, I was amazed at how well she was faring as we settled back into our rhythm at Cornell. As agreed, we returned to classes the Monday after we got back, which essentially meant that during the hours we were both on campus, we were forced to almost completely ignore one another. That was exceptionally difficult, but we'd made it through one week. Only a few more to go before the semester would be over.

I didn't mean to listen to Ellie's conversation, but I heard her voice take on a slightly higher register as she pressed her sister for an update on what was happening in Alaska. I found myself standing in the doorway of the kitchen, watching her, before I had time to consider getting up from the couch. I watched her listening to Alice explain that her parents were going to be absorbed in dealing with the drama there for some time to come. Ellie nodded and bit her lip. I knew what Alice said wasn't surprising at this point but I could still see the hurt in her eyes that she tried very hard to hide. I moved to stand next to her, holding her in my arms as tears started to slip down her cheeks.

When she hung up with her sister, I took her phone and set it on the counter and turned her to face me, gently folding her into my arms. A sob slipped from her, shaking her body once before she sucked in several deep breaths, shaking her head. "I'm okay," she murmured, whether to me or to herself I wasn't sure.

"You don't need to be okay sweetheart," I whispered. "Not here, not with me."

I felt her head shake again. "No I need to be okay, for me."

I nodded, pulling her head to my chest and tucking it under my chin. "Okay."

Later that night, she lay naked in my arms, her breathing so calm I thought she might have fallen asleep. "Mm, no," she mumbled, rolling slightly to kiss my chest. "I'm awake." I combed my fingers through her hair and pulled the covers up higher over her. She shifted again, picking her head up to see my face. "So, I never asked how your day was?"

I leaned up to kiss her once. "It was fine. I couldn't wait to get home to you. I really can't talk you into auditing my other classes?"

She laughed. "I thought about it earlier." She settled back down with her head against my chest. "I went to my parents' house today," she whispered against my skin.

"You did?"

"Yeah. I just poked around a bit, looking to see what they might want sent out to them...after they've settled." She paused, and I rubbed her back without speaking. "I found something," she said after a minute or two. She twisted away from me, yanking open the drawer of the bedside table. She pulled out a long chain with a small pendant, smaller than a silver dollar. She handed it to me and I recognized the symbol immediately. It was the same crest that her brothers occasionally wore on their wrists.

"I've never seen you wear this," I commented.

"That's because haven't worn it in ages. It's probably been at least a year since I've really taken note of it, but I usually keep it with me wherever we go. I forgot it when we went to Denali."

I nodded and dropped the pendant and chain into her palm. She put it back on the little table and curled up against me again. "I don't know why, it just made me feel better to have it here."

I kissed her head. "I'm glad you found it then," I said. "Go to sleep, love."

"I love you," she murmured through a yawn.

"And I, you, Ellie." She hummed peacefully against me as she drifted off to sleep. Lying with her in our quiet house, it could easily have been three weeks ago – before Denali, before Forks. In some ways everything had changed for us, almost literally over night. On the other hand it was as if it had always been this way – the two of us, together, unbreakable.

As she slept that night, I found myself imagining our forever. I thought of the question that I was dying to ask her, and that I struggled not to think about in her presence when she was awake. I feared I would slip at the wrong moment and overwhelm her. But while she slept, I thought of it constantly. I thought about her parents, so willingly offering me their blessing to wed their daughter and wondered how she would feel to know that I'd already asked for her hand.

Ellie's body tensed suddenly, and without warning she sat up, pulling the sheets around her.

"You did what?!"

* * *

**EPOV**

Despite everything that happened, I continued to sleep easily each night; the familiar horror that often haunted my subconscious held at bay for now. I would doze with Christopher's loving thoughts echoing in my mind, and when I awoke each morning, I was greeted by the same. I knew he probably enjoyed the reprieve from my intrusive abilities, though he'd never once complained about it. I wondered occasionally if he would ever grow tired of the lack of mental privacy.

I had asked him once if it bothered him and he insisted it didn't. His thoughts never gave any sign that he hadn't been truthful, but I tried to give him as much space in his own mind as mine would allow.

When I started to rouse the next morning, the first thing I became aware of – other than the feeling of cool skin beneath me - were the thoughts in Christopher's mind. He was remembering a conversation with my father, and I realized it must have been on the way to the airport several days prior.

_"I give you my permission and my blessing," my father said to Christopher._

_My mother's face appeared; she touched his cheek and whispered, "And you have my blessing, too."_

My breath caught and my muscles froze, and before I could fully process what I had seen, I was sitting up, clutching the sheets around me. "You did what?!" I gasped, staring wide-eyed at him.

He laid there stunned for several seconds, hands frozen in place, nothing but empty air beneath them where my sleeping form had been.

"Christopher?" I crawled back to kneel next to him.

"Um. I, uh...I thought you were still asleep," he stuttered. "Sorry." He dropped his hands against his chest. "How much of that..."

"I'm not sure?" I responded shyly. I looked at his hands, not at his eyes, and I felt my face grow hot as I thought. "It sounded like you asked my parents if you could...um..." It was my turn to stumble over my words.

"I'm sorry Ellie," he said, apologizing again. "I didn't want to overwhelm you I just..."

His words ceased - I silenced him with a hungry kiss. He kissed me back without hesitation, rolling me to my back and pressing his chest against mine. I struggled to free my mouth after a moment.

"Chris," I panted. "Do you really want to?"

He grinned, unabashed now. "What? Get married? Or..." He cocked an eyebrow and leaned back down to kiss me again. I pushed his face back.

"Christopher," I groaned. "You know what I'm asking."


	3. Forever

**ChPOV**

"Yes, Ellie. I want to marry you." I watched her face carefully. Her eyes widened slightly and she drew in a ragged breath. But she didn't respond. "Ellie?"

"What?"

I ran my hand along her cheekbone, then her jaw line, and continued down her neck and over her shoulder. She shuddered.

"Did you hear me?" I whispered, placing a kiss under her ear.

"Uh-huh." She arched her back slightly, pressing her chest into mine.

"Well," I drew my tongue along her neck, "what do you think about that?"

"Um…" she panted, "I think this might be considered duress." I laughed, nipping her shoulder lightly. "But…"

I picked my head up and arched an eyebrow at her. "But?"

She flashed a sly grin. "But, you haven't actually asked me anything yet, you know."

My eyes widened and I bit back a grin. "I did so. I asked what you thought about it. And before that, I asked if you heard me."

Her lips twitched. "Why are you making me drag this out of you?" she huffed, suddenly looking annoyed. "If you don't want to ask me fine. But don't tease me about it."

I brushed her hair back and kissed her once, apologizing for upsetting her and acknowledging the admonishment. "That wasn't nice of me. Listen…" I hesitated, afraid my next request might frustrate her further. "Before we talk anymore about this – would you mind if we got dressed? I always kind of envisioned this conversation as one where we're not um…naked."

I said this while looking at her shoulder, too scared to look her in the eye. When I finally looked up, she looked incredulous, but nodded. I kissed her once more. "Thank you."

She grabbed her clothes and walked into the bathroom to dress – at first I thought she had decided to shower, but I could hear her pulling on her clothes just a second later. Before she emerged, I dressed quickly and flashed across the room to my dresser, retrieving something from the top drawer and shoving it into my pocket. I kept my thoughts as carefully controlled as possible.

When she came out of the bathroom, dressed in her usual simple shirt and jeans, she found me sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for her. I patted the space beside me, shifting to face her as she sat down.

"Christopher," she said quietly, looking at her hands. "I'm sorry. I put you on the spot before. I reacted before I could stop myself and—"

"Ellie, Ellie, wait," I interrupted her frantic apologies, feeling insanely guilty that this conversation had taken such a turn. I took her hands and closed them inside my own. "Please don't apologize. I didn't mean to tease you, I was just…I didn't know how to react, myself. I knew I would slip up sooner or later." I let one of her hands go to drag it through my hair with a sigh. "I'm sorry, Ellie. I've totally botched this."

"Chris…" she whispered.

I reached for her face, holding it up a little to face me. "Ellie. What you heard in my mind…I really did ask your father for his permission, and for your hand. He gave his blessing freely, and your mother told me I had hers as well before we left Forks."

Her eyes widened, and I could see the slight sheen of moisture forming as I continued. "When I planned to return here – to tie up my loose ends," I reminded her with a wink, "I had every intention of proposing to you shortly after I returned to Forks. I had hoped your parents would give me their blessing, but if I'm being totally honest – I would have asked you anyway." I took a deep breath. "But, when everything changed so quickly, I thought it might be better to wait. You've been through so much, Ellie. And we do have forever; I didn't want to rush you."

I moved from the bed, crouching before her on one knee. She gasped, but I didn't meet her eyes. Instead I looked down for a moment to make sure my voice would stay steady. When I finally looked back up at her, tears were falling freely from her eyes.

"I still don't want to rush you, Ellie. But if I had it my way, I would have married you the second I knew you were mine forever. Please know that if it's too soon for you to even think of this, I will understand. I promise I won't be going anywhere. Unless you decide that you don't want me by your side, I'm yours. Forever."

When she didn't protest, I reached into my pocket and pulled out a small box, flipping it open and taking her hand in mine. "Eleanor Elizabeth Cullen; I love you more than life, and I cannot fathom forever without you. I don't care if it's tomorrow, or a hundred years from now, but will you please, please, marry me?"

She stared at me, not even looking at the ring that I held out in front of her, and for several unending seconds I had convinced myself that she would tell me no. I struggled to be patient, but wished desperately to know what was going on inside her head. She glanced down for a second, sniffing and brushing tears off her cheeks before finally looking back up at me with a brilliant smile. I knew that if it could, my heart would be beating out of my chest in celebration.

* * *

**EPOV**

I felt dazed and sluggish as I struggled to process the words that were coming out of his mouth. I heard the question, and I knew he was dying for my answer, but the truth was that for several seconds – hell, it could have been several hours – my mind refused to comprehend the words that I'd all but begged him to say just a few minutes before.

Even when I realized I hadn't imagined his proposal, I couldn't quite speak. I was enraptured by the images in his mind as he imagined our life together. I hardly even breathed until I heard the accompanying fear in his thoughts – I'd been silent for so long he thought I was going to refuse him. It was then that I noticed the tears dripping down my cheeks. With a quick glance down at the small box that he held open in his palm, I scrubbed my hand across my wet face and smiled back at him.

"Yes," I breathed. "Absolutely yes."

He plucked the ring from the box and slipped it on my finger; an exultant smile lighting up his face. The metal of the ring was cool against my skin and the diamonds glittered in the soft light of the room. I held up my hand slightly to inspect the ring for the first time.

"Holy crap, Chris," I breathed as I realized just how ornate it was. The large center diamond was enshrined within a circle of smaller diamonds, with even more tiny diamonds set into a rose-gold band. It was like nothing I ever would have picked out on my own, but I absolutely loved it, and I tried to tell him so as I was overcome by a new wave of tears.

He moved to sit beside me, folding his arms around me and holding me against his chest, laughing as he tried to comfort me. "I love you, Ellie. So much. I hope you know how happy you've made me, because I haven't the words to describe it."

I had no words either, so I pulled myself up and positioned myself over him, kneeling with my legs on either side of his lap. My fingers tangled in his hair as my mouth found his. I tried to communicate everything that I couldn't find words to say aloud. He accepted my kiss hungrily, responding eagerly, his fingers spreading across my back and curling into my hair. My fingers slid down his neck to his collar as my lips travelled across his jaw and down his neck. Before I could unbutton his shirt, I was suddenly – though as gently as possible – pulled away from him.

Startled, I looked at his face – his eyes were smoldering and he was breathing quickly. He smiled, cupping my face with one hand.

"Chris," I protested, struggling against his hold to get close to him again.

"Wait, wait, Ellie," he said with a husky laugh that sent a shiver down my spine, despite the heat building between my legs. "Ellie," he said again. "I just want…" he hesitated, dragging a hand through his hair. "Are you sure?"

I laughed. "Am I sure?" I wiggled my hips against him, brushing over where he was hard. "Of course I am."

He rolled his eyes, but I could hear him struggling not to forget whatever it was he wanted to say and throwing me down on the bed. I bit my lip and raised an eyebrow. "Jesus, woman," he moaned. "That's not what I meant." He took my left hand and twisted the ring on my finger. "I mean are you sure? I don't want you to rush. Or to think you'll…lose me….if you're not ready."

I broke his hold and silenced him with another kiss. "Christopher," I breathed, pulling back and stroking his face; leaning my forehead against his. "I am one-hundred percent sure. I want nothing more than to be your wife." I could feel the tension in his shoulders dissipate as he accepted my words. "Now," I whispered. "If you don't mind…" I pressed my lips back to his, only to be denied again.

He chuckled when I sighed. "I'm sorry, love. There's just one more thing I wanted to ask you, if that's all right?"

I climbed out of his lap, kneeling on the bed. I motioned for him to continue as he turned to face me. He reclaimed my left hand in his own and took a deep breath. "So," he said, staring at my ring. "I meant what I said before. Every word."

"Okay." I waited for him to explain.

He smiled. "I don't want to rush you," he said again. "But I was rather hoping you would be interested in getting married sooner…rather than later." He looked up at me through his lashes, smiling shyly.

I meant for my answer to be playful, but really, my words sounded incredulous. "Chris, you didn't _really_ think I would make you wait 100 years, did you?"

"Well, I certainly hoped not," he laughed. "But I also didn't know for sure that you would say yes at all. It only occurred to me as I was asking you that might not ever even want to get married."

He played with my ring anxiously as I struggled to formulate an articulate response. "Well in all honestly, it's not something I've thought much about, specifically." Turning my left hand over, I wove my fingers through his. "I still have trouble wrapping my head around this," I waved my hand between us. "And that's not a bad thing," I added quickly when he started to look worried. "I just mean it hits me all over again every time you look at me. I know this is forever," I emphasized my words by squeezing his hand, "and the fact that I don't have the slightest doubt of that just kind of blows my mind."

He reached out to touch my face, and I had to struggle to keep my voice steady and eyes dry – the emotion he was feeling was written all over his face. I was certain he would have tears if he could. I held his hand against my cheek, our other hands still linked in his lap.

"Christopher, when you asked me to marry you I saw what that looked like to you, and I've never wanted anything more." I turned my head to kiss his palm. "If you told me you had a judge downstairs right now I'd say, 'Let's go.'"

"You would?" he asked in disbelief. "Really? Even without...everyone else here?"

I sighed and looked away for a moment, again trying to collect my thoughts. When I looked back at him, I smiled. "Yes. Even without them here. We have made the decision already to live our lives; we're not just sitting around waiting for the 'all clear.' We have their blessing, apparently, so why not? They will be upset with me that we did it without them, but it's my life. _Our_ life. Not theirs."

He pulled me back into a embrace so tight I had to squirm away slightly to catch a breath. "Sorry," he whispered sheepishly when he realized. "I just can't believe this is real Ellie. I love you so much." I managed to pull myself up against him, again trying to claim his mouth with mine. This time there would be no denying me.

"What idiot told you to put on clothes?" he groaned as he surrendered. I could hear fabric shredding as we fell back against the bed, and when he pressed himself against me there was nothing in the world that mattered other than his skin on mine. His need overwhelmed me; I could feel it surging through every frantic touch. His mind screamed his possessiveness, and he wasted no time joining our bodies, claiming me as his own again and again.

* * *

**ChPOV**

Ellie rolled off of me, lying back against the pillows. She was a glorious sight in the aftermath of our frenzied lovemaking – her tangled curls splayed out across the pillow, her skin glowing with flushed radiance. I rolled with her, propping myself up on my elbow, watching her chest rise and fall as her breathing slowly settled, a satiated smile on her lips.

Eyes still half-closed, she reached up with her left hand, twisting her fingers into my hair. "What time is it?" she whispered.

I chuckled, stealing a glance at the clock as I leaned down to press a kiss into the soft space between her breasts. "A little after noon," I answered, my lips brushing across her skin.

I looked up in time to see her eyelids flutter, her gaze focusing on my face. She smiled and drew her fingertips along my face, outlining my cheek and my jaw. "So, we haven't discussed specifics yet."

I grinned. "Oh?" I said playfully.

"Mmm," she murmured. "You want to get married soon, yes?"

"Yes."

She shifted slightly underneath me as one of my hands moved down over the side of her breast, along her ribs, and coming to rest on her hip.

"I was wondering how exactly you would define soon?"

"How's yesterday?"

She laughed and rolled her eyes. "No really, Chris. Are we hitting up a courthouse on Monday? Vegas next weekend? I'm not making fun, here, I really want to know what you had in mind, since you have so cleverly kept it _out_ of your mind before now." She winked at me, presumably to emphasize her point that she wasn't trying to give me grief.

"Well, since you asked, I was wondering if you had plans tomorrow," I said slowly.

Her eyebrows shot up, but her expression showed no other signs of stress at the suggestion. "Tomorrow?"

I nodded, pressing a kiss against her neck. "I know a guy who owes me a favor."

"You 'know a guy?'" I felt her giggle vibrate gently through her chest.

"Mmhm," I mumbled, my lips moving down toward her shoulder. "A judge. If it's all right with you, I was going to call him and ask if he could pop over tomorrow afternoon." I pulled back so I could look her in the eye. "Now that you've agreed to marry me, and to do it quickly, I don't know how I will make it through another day without being able to call you my wife."

I watched her take in my words. Her mouth opened as if she were going to speak, only to close again without a sound. Her lower lip stuck out slightly as she thought, and I had to resist the urge to suck it between my teeth. I nudged her slightly when she didn't say anything after another minute or two.

"Ellie? Tell me what you are thinking, please?"

She smiled. "I was thinking that you are awfully confident that your judge-friend doesn't have something better to do tomorrow." She tapped my nose with her index finger, and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Trust me. He will do it. I just need to know that you want to."

She pulled my face toward her, pressing her lips softly against mine. "You better find your phone, mister," she whispered. I needed no more instructions after that; I pressed one last quick kiss to her lips before I jumped up from the bed, grabbing a pair of boxers from the dresser and darting downstairs – I'd left my phone in the kitchen.

As I scrolled threw my contacts, I thanked the heavens for my insane impulsiveness that led me to acquiring a marriage license a few days' prior, on the off-chance that Ellie agreed to marry me right away once I finally worked up the courage to ask her. In just a few minutes, I made the arrangements necessary for the next day, and hurried back upstairs to let her know that everything was taken care of. When I reached the bedroom, I was startled to find Ellie kneeling on the bed, looking frustrated and sad.

"Ellie?" I sat down in front of her and touched her cheek. "Sweetheart what's wrong? Is this too soon?"

She shook her head and wiped her eyes, pulling the sheet up and hugging her knees. "No," she said. "It's not that. I was just trying to call my mom and dad; well actually I called them all…nobody answered. Not even Alice, and she had to have seen what we've decided to do, right?"

I scooted further onto the bed so I could wrap my arms around her. "Ellie, we don't have to do this now," I whispered. I hated the thought that even the slightest thing concerning our marriage would cause her to be upset, even if it was out of my control. She shook her head vehemently.

"Yes, we do," she said. "I want to marry you. I just wanted to tell someone first."

"Then we will wait until you can reach someone. I mean it. It's okay."

She shook her head again. "No, it's not okay. Look," she paused, taking my hands, "I am not doing this to rebel against my stupid family. I told you before that this is our life. I am not putting our life on hold if they can't even be bothered to pick up their damn phones."

I looked at her for a long moment. I could see the resolve in her eyes, and I knew she wanted this as much as I did. And while I also knew that her family members surely had their hands full with a raging newborn vampire to mind, I was furious with my soon-to-be in-laws for hurting her this way. She didn't like to show weakness or pain, but there was no denying that this separation had indeed hurt her.

"Christopher," she said, calling my attention back to her. "I'm not doing this to try and keep you from running off, either, you know." I chuckled pulled her face to me, kissing her forehead.

"I never thought that, love."

She wound her fingers into my hair, leaning her forehead against mine. "I know. I just felt like I should acknowledge it out loud." She pulled back so she could look me in the eyes. "I love you, Christopher. And I cannot wait to be your wife."


	4. Unexpected, Part One

**EPOV**

The heat of the morning sunlight on my face as it streamed in through the window was a sharp contrast to the cool arms locked around my body as I woke. I pressed my back against my husband's chest. He combed my hair back with his hand and I arched my neck as his fingers lightly brushed against my skin.

"Good morning wife," he whispered, wrapping his arm across my chest, grabbing my breast in one large hand. I trembled as his wedding ring grazed my nipple; I loved the feeling of his ring against my skin. His lips turned up into a smile against my neck as I arched my hips upward as he reached his other hand between my legs.

His hissed when he felt my wet skin, rubbing roughly against my clit and pulling me back against him, pushing his cock up against my ass. His fingers moved faster over my skin, bringing me to a quick release. He slid three fingers inside me as I came, groaning into my hair as my muscles clamped down around his fingers. He rolled me to my stomach, raising my hips slightly and pressing against my entrance. I arched my back and spread my legs further apart for him.

His right hand squeezed my hip as he pressed into me. I felt his chest against my back as he leaned over me, his left arm stretching out over my arm and his fingers lacing between mine. With our hands still interlocked, he shoved my hair out of the way so he could kiss my shoulder, sucking and nipping the skin he could reach while trying to maintain his rhythm. With nearly all of his body weight over me I could barely move my hips, but the feeling of his slow, deliberate thrusts into me were quickly pushing me back to the edge. I turned my head toward our entwined hands, watching the muscles in his arms flex as he squeezed my fingers in sync with his movements in and out of me.

When I was gasping for breath beneath him, I felt his right hand slip under me, his fingers again working the sensitive bundle of nerves beneath my folds. His hips slapped urgently against my ass and he growled into my ear as he came, the sound sending another burst of warmth through my body.

I whimpered as I felt him withdraw from me, but he didn't go far. He kissed the space below my ear and slid his tongue down my neck until he reached the space between my shoulders, pressing a kiss to my skin. He kissed and licked down my spine and over one of my ass cheeks, squeezing the other side in his hand. I shivered when I felt his teeth lightly grazing the curve of my bottom.

"Christopher," I murmured, struggling to think. Somewhere in my muddled mind I remembered that he had his last student evaluation scheduled today. "I thought you had to be on campus this morning?" He chuckled as he drew his tongue along my back again, retracing his path. The vibration against my skin caused goose bumps to rise along my arms.

He rolled back to his side, pulling me against his chest, linking his hands across my stomach and listening to my breathing for a moment before answering me. "I do. But I decided I could be a little late." His teeth grazed against my shoulder. "What are they going to do? Fire me?"

I laughed weakly; rolling so that my chest was pressed against his and reaching up to drag my fingers through his hair, scratching his scalp with my nails. Christopher had already informed the dean that he would not be returning to his post next semester, and we'd planned a trip to visit several institutions across the country where he had lined up interviews. We were to leave on Saturday. "I would apologize for making you late, but I don't think I could ever be sorry for a wake up like that."

"I should hope not." His breath was cool on my ear, but his voice scorched beneath my skin. "There will be many, many more where that came from, Mrs. Dawling."

I shivered and slid my hand along the firm curve of his ass, angling my face toward him, inviting him to lay claim to my lips with his own. He accepted my offering all too willingly, pulling away breathlessly several minutes later.

"Unfortunately, love, I really do need to get ready to go soon."

I dragged myself away from him; the sheets tangled around me as I sat up. I pushed my hair off my face and pulled my knees against my chest, watching him as he strode to the dresser. He pulled on the first pair of boxers he found and grabbed a white t-shirt. As he pulled the shirt over his head, his eyes met mine and he broke out into a wide grin.

"What?" he asked as I watched him, unabashed.

I giggled. "I was just thinking about how that is my second-favorite look for you."

He arched a perfect eyebrow in amusement. "Second-favorite? I bet I can guess your first-favorite."

"I bet you can too, Professor." He laughed and threw one of his t-shirts at me.

"Put something on or I will never get out of here."

I did as he instructed, slipping into the light-blue shirt that he'd plucked from his hamper. I'd barely had a chance to stand up after freeing myself from the rumpled bed-sheets when Christopher – now fully dressed – scooped me up and tossed me over his shoulder.

"Come on," he said, laughing when I squealed and kicked my legs. "I'll make you coffee before I go."

"Put me down!" I cried, but my protest was marred by my laughter. He smacked my bare bottom as he reached the last step. "Christopher!"

He shifted me so that my legs were around his waist, holding my up with one hand on my ass, grabbing my hair with his other hand and pulling my face to his. His tongue swept over my lips and I parted them eagerly, groaning into his mouth as we kissed. I struggled to keep from pressing myself into his stomach.

"Chris," I whispered. "You better stop or I'm going to get your shirt all wet." He pulled my bottom lip between his teeth, sucking lightly and then setting me down.

"Later then." His eyes flashed as he adjusted his pants. "I want to see you just like that when I come home."

I giggled as he took my hand and led me to the kitchen. "I thought you wanted me to meet me in your office later when you're done?" He lifted me up and set me on the counter and kissed my cheek before filling the coffee maker with water.

"Hmm, you're right." He grinned mischievously. "Just wear a long coat."

I reached out to tug his hair, but my hand froze in front of me. He didn't notice until he finished putting the coffee grinds into the filter. "Something wrong, baby?"

I hopped off the counter and made a beeline for the stairs. "Ellie?" His voice echoed behind me.

"Christopher, we have company!" I called back to him, startling when I realized he had beaten me to the staircase, his hand closing around my wrist. "Chris, let go!" I could hear the car pulling into the drive. "I'm not wearing any pants!"

"Who is it?" he asked, flashing a crooked grin as he let me go.

"Garrett and Kate!" I shouted as I reached the second floor. "Umm, Carmen and Eleazar are with them too."

"Hmm," he murmured, peeking out the front window. "I wonder why they didn't call first."

I slammed the bedroom door shut, frantically searching for some clean clothes. Once dressed, I ducked into the bathroom. I groaned when I saw my hair and quickly brushed it back into a ponytail. I had just finished twisting the elastic around the messy knot on my head when I heard the knock at the door.

"Baby, can you let them in?" Christopher called up the stairs. "I need to call over to campus and bump my appointment back now." A little late had just turned into a lot late, thanks to the arrival of our uninvited guests.

I took a breath to prepare myself for the coming onslaught and yanked open the front the door.

"Hi guys!"

* * *

**CHPOV**

After I had arranged to meet my student the next day instead, I placed my phone down on the kitchen counter. Not in a hurry to deal with our visitors, I snagged a coffee mug from the rack beside the sink and poured a cup for Ellie, fixing it how she liked. I listened to the conversation in the other room as Ellie exchanged pleasantries and invited everyone to have a seat in the living room.

"Christopher will join us in a moment," she said politely. "He's just switching around his schedule a bit I think." I recognized the subtle undertone of her voice and picked up the mug.

"Oh that's not necessary," said Kate as I walked into the room. I smiled at Ellie and handed her the cup, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and kissing her cheek as I sat down on the arm of the sofa beside her.

"So what brings you all out here?" I asked, turning my attention to our visitors. "We weren't expecting to see anyone for quite a while."

Ellie and I had been back in Ithaca for nearly two months, and much to her dismay there had been little word from her family in that time. The few times she had been able to get someone on the phone, the story was always the same – the family was fully absorbed in managing Bella's adjustment. These days she rarely voiced her irritation over the situation, but I knew that the true testament to her frustration lie in the fact that she had not shared with them the news that we had married.

"Sorry for just dropping in like this," Garrett said. The look on his face suggested that the apology was sincere. "Alice sent us, though she didn't say why." He shrugged. "You know how she is. Everyone just jumps at her say so."

Ellie hissed and I squeezed her shoulder, wondering whose thoughts she was reacting to.

She glared at Garrett. "Did Alice also tell you to show up without calling first?"

At this, my old friend grinned, unabashed. His eyes glanced down at Ellie's coffee mug, which she clutched in her left hand. Her rings shimmered in the light and I felt her tense next to me.

"She didn't explain why," he said slowly, looking back up at Ellie's face, "but I suspect she thinks her little sister is keeping secrets."

Ellie set her coffee down on the table and crossed her arms. "That's not her business. And she can talk to me herself if she feels otherwise." I rubbed her back, opening my mouth to try and change the subject. Before I could speak, she hopped off the couch. "I'm going to get some air, okay? I will be back in a little while." She kissed me once and gave a little wave and darted out the door.

Kate looked at me apologetically before glancing over to Carmen. "Chris, would you like us to go after her?" Carmen nodded and started to stand. I heard Ellie's car start and I raised my hand.

"Shit, I really didn't mean to upset her," Garrett said, leaning away from Kate's glowering stare.

"Don't worry about it," I said as she peeled out of the drive. "She will be fine." I glanced back to Garrett. "That was real smooth though, man. She's pissed enough at her family right now, so thanks so much for rubbing that in."

"Sorry," he said again.

"So if I'm understanding correctly," said Eleazar, speaking up for the first time since I'd entered the room, "it sounds as if congratulations are in order?"

"When was the wedding?" Carmen asked.

"A few weeks ago," I said. "It was quiet. I had an acquaintance who was able to perform it here and once we decided to do it neither of us wanted to wait..." I shrugged.

The five of us chatted for a while more, but I started to get anxious when I realized Ellie had been gone longer than I expected. As the Denalis talked amongst each other, I picked up the forgotten coffee mug and dumped it in the kitchen sink, rinsing the cup and leaving it in the basin. Out of the corner of my eye I spotted my cell phone. I reached over and found Ellie's number.

After a second, I heard her phone ringing from within the house. I swore as I shoved my phone into my pocket. I felt like a huge rock had dropped down into my stomach when I realized I had no way to reach her to make sure she was all right. Garrett appeared in the doorway.

"You okay?"

"Ellie left her phone. I think I'm going to see if I can track her down."

"She took the car didn't she? I will drive you," he offered. I nodded and followed him out. "We'll be back," he called to the others. He quickly backed down the driveway a moment later. "Any idea where she went?"

"Not really. Maybe campus? She likes to walk around there." I gave him directions and we rode around the areas where she would most likely have gone, but there was no trace of her. "Damn it." I rubbed my forehead as I thought. "I know where she went. Go back out the way you came and make a left at the main road."

* * *

**EPOV**

When I got to my parent's house, the first thing that hit me was the overpowering stench of dust and emptiness. I wandered aimlessly for a while before finding a rag and the dust spray and removing the silent evidence of time's passage from the furniture. I knew it was unlikely that anyone else would ever come back here, except maybe to sell or sort through the belongings left behind, but the abandoned state of the house tugged at my own feelings of loss and abandonment that I tried so hard to keep buried.

After I cleaned, I curled up on the sofa, hugging my knees against my chest. I knew it was silly to have run off like I did, and that Garrett had only been playing around. But his words confirmed what I had guessed: that Alice sent them without warning to let me know that she knew what I hadn't told the rest of the family and she wasn't happy about it. I wanted to rage at my sister then; after all, they had banished me. The choices I made were not their concern right now.

I jumped to my feet, shoving my hand into my pocket to retrieve my phone – I'd decided I would end the stand off with my sister now. Except, that there was no phone in my pocket. The empty fabric brushing against my fingers stirred a new panic.

"Shit," I whispered to the gaping, empty house. It was cold to me now when I realized how alone I really was here. I knew if Christopher tried to call me and realized I forgot my phone he would be beside himself. I decided to call him before I left the house, but the sudden sound of tires turning onto the drive stopped me in my tracks.

When the soft knock came at the front door, I considered not answering. As I stood in the living room, frozen in indecision, I heard another knock – this time it was followed by an authoritative command. "Open the door or I will do it for you."

Before I knew what I was doing I pulled open the front door, gasping at the sight of the visitor even though I'd known who was waiting for me on the other side.

"Chief Swan." I remembered my manners as if I were still in Forks, and calmly gestured for him to enter the barren home.


	5. Unexpected, Part Two

**EPOV**

Charlie Swan did not look well as he stood on the front porch. Lines of exhaustion and purple bags marred his eyes. That he'd lost weight in the weeks since Bella disappeared was made obvious from the unnatural hollow of his cheeks; he looked much more fragile than he should for a man of his age. I stood aside as I waited for him to step over the threshold and closed the door behind me as he appraised the darkened house. When I turned around to face him, I could read the questions written across the lines on his face.

"Where is she?"

I bit my lip. I knew I couldn't answer him truthfully, and under normal circumstances I was as skilled as the rest of my family at lying under pressure, but the pain etched in his face made me hesitate. His eyes narrowed when I didn't reply.

"I know you know something, young lady. Do not just stand there."

I bristled at being spoken to like a child. "She's not here," I replied coolly.

He glanced around and waved a hand in front of him. "It's just you here?"

"Er…sort of…" I didn't want to get into this with Charlie – as far as he knew I was a 17-year-old senior in high school, not a married half-vampire. I shoved my left hand in my pocket, and looked him directly in the eye. "Look, Chief Swan, what you're looking for isn't here."

"You know where they are?" He studied me carefully and swore under his breath when I didn't answer. "She said she would be here," he muttered. He glanced behind him toward the front door as if he expected someone else to come in. "Damn her."

"Damn _who_, Charlie?" I struggled understand his fragmented thoughts. "Who told you she would be here?"

He glared at me. "Victoria. She said she knew your family and would help me find Bella."

Suddenly, his thoughts were crystal clear – he focused on his memory of the vampire woman with the flaming red hair. I felt all of the color drain from my face when I realized that he hadn't come here alone.

"Oh god, Charlie. We need to get out of here." I dove for my car keys. "It's not safe. Do you know where she is?" I closed my eyes to concentrate, listening for any trace of a vampire mind. I couldn't hear anything, so I decided the best thing I could do now was get Charlie away from the house. I walked over to him and took his elbow and ushered him to the door, reminding myself to keep a human's pace.

He shook me off. "What are you doing? I'm not leaving here without Bella."

I whirled on my heel to face him. "She's. Not. Here," I hissed. "And if we don't get out of here we won't be here much longer either."

"What are you talking about?" He refused to budge when I tried to push him toward the door again.

"Charlie. I really can't explain right now, but I'm telling you that if Victoria is really here that is not a good thing. I don't care what she's told you to get you here. We have to go." When I reached for the door handle, I knew I was too late. I could hear Victoria coming through the clearing, and I had just enough time to shove Charlie back toward the living room before she flew into the house.

"Too late, little Cullen," the red-headed vampire sneered, her eyes flashing to Charlie. "Charlie, thank you for your help. Your detective work was quite useful."

I snorted. "Yeah, except Bella and my brother aren't here you idiot."

Victoria nearly disappeared as she crossed the few feet separating us, yanking my head back by my hair. I was suddenly reminded of Christopher's admonishment weeks ago about aggravating the most irritated vampire in the room. "As it happens, I knew that, Eleanor. I know where the rest of them are, but I thought I could have a little fun with Edward's mate before she dies – starting with the horrific death of her father," she rearranged her face in an expression that almost appeared mournful as she looked at Charlie again, "who tragically ended his own life when he reached another dead end while in search of his missing daughter."

Charlie's eyes widened. "Victoria, what? I thought…you said you could help," he croaked. He glanced at me as Victoria gave another vicious yank on my hair. I gritted my teeth to keep from crying out.

"Stop it! You're hurting her," he yelled, reaching inside his jacket – he was wearing his gun holster.

"Charlie, don't," I gasped. I knew Victoria was bulletproof, but I had enough problems right now without finding out that I wasn't. "It won't help you." Another yank. "Ow! Get off bitch!" I tried to free myself, but Victoria was too strong, and I was rewarded for my struggle with her ice-cold hand around my neck and my back pressed against the wall. I fought against her hold, but my feet weren't touching the ground and every move I made increased the pressure of her hand against my throat.

She cocked her head and her mouth turned up into a sick smile. "Shall we perform a little experiment? How long can a half-human go without needing to take a breath?"

I could feel each second tick by as I held in what little air I had left. She shoved harder against my throat, knocking into my chest with her elbow. The air I'd been holding onto escaped between my lips with a woosh, and I tried unsuccessfully to pull an adequate breath back in. I started flailing again, my instincts panicking without oxygen in my lungs.

_Please, Alice,_ I thought as I started seeing spots before my eyes. _Please, please see this._

Before I could pass out from lack of air, Victoria pulled me away from the wall, holding me only by my throat, and shoved me back against it, cracking the plaster with my skull. I felt my body crumple to the ground before everything around me went black.

* * *

**ChPOV**

I stared out the windshield, aware that Garrett was shooting sideways glances in my direction as he drove. He cleared his throat when we were a few miles from the Cullen home.

"I'll just drop you off when we get there. I'm sure she wouldn't want to see me anyway."

My phone started ringing and I fished it from my pocket, answering without even looking at the screen. "Ellie, I'm almost there."

"Christopher," came her sister's voice from the other end of the line. "You need to get there _now_."

I pulled the phone away from my mouth. "Pull over, we're running." It was a testament to our long-interrupted friendship that he immediately swerved into the shoulder and cut the engine, abandoning the vehicle and following me through the woods.

I turned my attention back to Alice. "What happened?"

"Chris, I didn't see," she wailed. "Victoria. She's at the house." I swore as I ended the call and shoved the phone back into my pocket.

"Victoria?" Garrett asked as we ran. "Laurent's friend?"

"Who's Laurent?"

"Uh, this guy that ran with the vampire they tangled with in Phoenix last spring. Laurent stayed with us for a while but left because his friend needed help with something. Irina left town a week ago to try to find him because he never came back. She thinks the wolves in Washington got him."

I quickened my stride as I recalled Ellie explaining what had happened in Phoenix - and what I had heard when during our brief return to Forks. "Yeah, that Victoria," I confirmed darkly as Garrett caught up. "Apparently she'd been trying to get to Bella after Ellie's family left Forks last year."

When the house finally came into view, we spread out, listening carefully to what was going on inside. I could hear Ellie's heart beat; the solid fluttering sound sending a shudder of relief through me that we weren't too late. Another heart, this one human, pounded nearby. I didn't have time to wonder why the human was there as we circled the house.

Garrett nodded toward the back door, and I headed for the front. I kicked open the door, and when I came around the corner I saw Garrett tackling the feral-looking redhead to the floor. I could see that the human man looked shaken but unharmed. My eyes scanned the wall across the room from where he cowered and my heart dropped into my stomach.

"Fuck!" I ran over to where Ellie lay unmoving on the ground, reminding myself when I reached her that her heart sounded strong and her breathing regular. "Ellie, sweetheart, I'm here baby," I choked as I gathered her in my arms. She stirred but didn't wake. I curled myself around her, burying my face in her hair. "Oh god, please be okay."

Garrett dragged Victoria out of the house and I could hear the fighting outside. I didn't want to let Ellie go, not knowing the full extent of her injuries, but I didn't want to risk her attacker getting away. My eyes flashed up to the man in the corner.

"You. What happened?"

His voice shook. "She had her by her throat and then smashed her into the wall." He shook his head in disbelief. "She just crumpled."

I swallowed the venom that seared as I looked Ellie over; hissing when I noticed the bruising on her throat. "Come here," I ordered. The man obeyed and walked slowly across the room, leaning away from me as I regarded him. "You watch her. You know CPR?"

He nodded.

"Good. If anything changes yell. I will hear you." He nodded once more and I forced myself to leave her.

When I caught up to Garrett, he and Victoria were circling each other. I could see where he'd managed to do some damage already - her right arm hung mangled and useless by her side. She didn't appear to notice my approach so I quickly took advantage, closing the remaining distance with one powerful lunge, and locking her head in my hands. I twisted with all my strength as I landed in front of her, and her body fell by my feet with a soft _thud_.

Once Victoria had been reduced to an acrid pile of smoldering ashes, I ran back into the house. Neither the man nor Ellie had moved. Garrett followed me in, murmuring quietly into his cellphone as he updated Kate on what had happened. I kneeled down in front of my wife, lightly cupping her face in my hand.

"Ellie?" I whispered. "Can you hear me, love?" I tried to choke back the gathering lump in my throat. "I'm here baby. You're okay. She's gone."

Again she stirred but did not wake. I smoothed back her hair, cursing when I felt dried blood matted against the back of her head. "Jesus," Garrett muttered as he peered over my shoulder.

I carefully turned her head so I could get a better look - thankfully it appeared that the injury had already sealed - only an angry red line remained of the gash. My phone started to buzz in my pocket, I answered the call, holding the device between my ear and shoulder as I gathered Ellie in my arms.

"Christopher, it's Carlisle."

"She's hurt, Carlisle," I choked.

"I know. Alice saw. She says Ellie will be fine though." He paused. "Why don't you give the phone to Garrett, I will tell him what you guys can do for her until she comes around."

I did as he asked and heard him giving orders to Garrett as I scooped Ellie up off of the floor. I turned back to the unfamiliar man.

"Thank you." He gave a sharp nod, suddenly finding the floor very interesting. I recognized the uncomfortable gesture, but I had no idea why. "I'm sorry. Who are you?"

His eyes met mine again, and I could see the fury beneath. "Charlie Swan. Bella is my daughter."


	6. Wake Up

**ChPOV**

When I brought Ellie home, I immediately carried her upstairs. Kate helped me clean the blood from her hair; allowing me the chance to make sure that the cut had indeed closed.

I sat by her side holding an ice pack to her scalp and watching in horror as the angry purple blotches on her skin continued to spread. Some hours later, a quiet knock at the door made me turn around.

"Hi," Carmen said softly. "I brought another ice pack if you need it."

"Thanks," I murmured. My hand was cold enough that the one I was holding had not thawed much, but I knew she just wanted to help.

"Carlisle's plane will land soon. Eleazar's on his way to pick him up." I nodded. I knew that Carlisle would have come regardless to make sure that Ellie was okay, but now there was also the added drama of Charlie Swan's appearance. I was relieved that he would be here soon to manage that complication. "Okay," Carmen said, backing away from the door. "Just let us know if you need anything."

The only thing I needed they couldn't give me. With a sigh, I pressed the ice pack back against Ellie's hair, kissing her forehead and praying to anything that might listen for her to come back to me.

* * *

**EPOV**

"Ellie?" Christopher dropped his keys in the bowl by the door, and I heard his bag hit the floor a second later.

"In the kitchen!" I carefully tossed the vegetables I'd chopped into the sauté pan. He appeared by my side, wrinkling his nose a bit as he looked over my shoulder. I laughed at his expression as I tilted my cheek up for a kiss. "Sorry, I felt like cooking tonight." He gave my hips a gentle squeeze before stepping aside and leaning back against the counter, watching me work. "How was your day?"

He smiled. "It was fine. I spent most of the afternoon dealing with my seniors who are all of a sudden realizing that their end-of-term assignment is actually due soon." He chuckled to himself as he picked up a small knife I'd discarded, absently rolling the handle in his hand. "I may have to squeeze in some extra office hours for the next couple of weeks."

I added some pasta to the water that just reached a boil. "Is it like that every year?"

"Pretty much, yeah." He was quiet for a few moments, staring intently at the knife still in his hand. He looked up again, regarding me with his head tilted slightly to the side. "So, I was wondering. How would you feel about Boulder?"

I clicked off the burners on the stove, turning to face him. "Boulder?"

He nodded. "I got a call back today from the University of Colorado in Boulder. Apparently one of their Music Theory professors happens to be leaving, so they have an opening." He glanced down at the floor, setting the dirty knife aside. "I thought we could add a stop to the end of our trip."

I stepped closer, sliding my hands along his waist, linking them behind his back and looking up to study his face. "That's where you really want to go, isn't it?"

He leaned down to kiss me softly, nibbling a little on my lower lip. "I don't _really_ care as long as you come with me, _Mrs._ Dawling. But yes, I am very interested in this particular position."

"Baby, I will follow you anywhere," I whispered, leaning up for another kiss. "You've already started looking at real-estate listings out there, haven't you?" His grin answered my question. "A little house in the mountains would be fabulous."

"Well," he chuckled, "I don't know how _little_ it would be, if we're going to find a place that offers enough, er, privacy. But yes. I definitely see the appeal of a place tucked away in the mountains."

He let me go so I could fix my plate, sitting down at the table with me while I ate. "So," I said between bites, "do you need to call them back to schedule an interview?"

"Well..." he flashed a sheepish grin, "I sort of already set it up. I hope that's okay."

I put my fork down and folded my arms, resting my elbows against the table. "Why wouldn't that be okay?"

He shrugged, twisting his wedding band around his finger. "I don't know. I just don't want you to feel like I'm just making all of the decisions for us." He glanced up at me, reaching for my hand. "Have you given any thought to what you want to do when we move?"

I bit my lip, studying the corner of the kitchen table. This was a subject that I had studiously avoided, but I knew I'd have to face it sooner or later. I knew he hadn't wanted to pressure me, but if we were going to live publicly as husband and wife, we would need to have a believable story, and I would need to have more than a couple years at a small-town high school behind me. I felt his fingers under my chin, gently urging me to look at him.

"Ellie?"

I sighed and turned my head. "Not really? I know we need to figure this out, I do but..." I pulled my hand back from his and crossed my arms over my chest, leaning back in my chair.

"But what, Ellie? Talk to me, please?"

I shrugged. "It's not that I haven't thought about it at all," I mumbled toward the plate of forgotten food. "It's just that every time I do, I realize that I have done absolutely nothing and that anything we tell people will be a total lie and I start freaking out that maybe I can't handle it and what if you finally realize that I really am just young and inexperienced and what the hell are you doing with me anyway?"

I squeezed my eyes shut, holding my breath when I finished my rant. When I peeked through my lashes, Christopher was watching me patiently, his lips twitching as if he were fighting back a smile. He pushed back from the table and held his arms out to me, beckoning me to sit in his lap.

"Darling," he said softly into my hair as I tucked myself against him, "there is nothing that would ever make me wonder what I am doing with you." His arms enveloped me and he kissed my cheek. "In fact, I often wonder what the hell I did without you for so long."

I snorted. "Right. Other than your three doctorates and decades of teaching and performing."

He chuckled. "I mean it Ellie. None of that mattered when I didn't have someone to share this unending life with. That's what you've given me, and I will never, ever give that up."

I sighed. "I know I'm just being stupid. I just get all up in my head and then I'm just stuck in this freak out cycle and so I just don't think about it at all." He turned me a little so he could kiss me, cupping me face gently in one of his hands.

"Ellie," he whispered, brushing his thumb over my lips and waiting for my eyes to meet his. "I don't think you are being stupid. And I don't want this to be a source of stress for you. Yes, we will always need to keep up a believable cover story. But that's not too different from what you're used to, sweetheart. It's just that now it will be our story." He rubbed his hands along my arms, sliding up to my shoulders and trying to knead away the tension that had built there.

I relaxed a little, leaning against his chest. "I have a few thoughts," he said, "if you'd like to hear them?"

"Okay," I whispered.

He kissed the top of my head. "Well, I was thinking that we could tell people that we met somewhere in town - maybe at a coffee shop or something. I taught at Cornell and maybe you had been studying at another nearby school - Ithaca College, perhaps?" I nodded as I listened and watched the corresponding images in his mind. Buoyed by my response, he continued. "I was thinking that if you want to - and only if you to - we could say that you'd been midway through a masters program in something - history, literature, whatever. Something you could easily pick up wherever we go."

I twisted to look up at him. "You think we can pull that off?"

He winked. "A few clicks on the computer should do it."

I giggled, thinking back to when Jasper worked us into Cornell's systems in September. We sat in silence as I thought over what he had suggested, and suddenly it all seemed more real, and much less overwhelming. My imagination started to run wild as I envisioned our future.

I closed my eyes to block the suddenly blinding light of the bright kitchen, but when I opened again I could hardly see through the thick black haze that had inexplicably fallen over us. "Chris." I clutched my head in my hands. "What's going on? Why does my head hurt?"

"Ellie," he said urgently. "Wake up, darling."

"What?" I tried to focus on his face but my eyes would no longer obey my command to open.

"Wake up, sweetheart. _Please_."

* * *

**ChPOV**

I heard the front door open downstairs - muffled voices spoke in the foyer. I could make out Carlisle's gentle but worried tone as Garrett explained again what had happened earlier. Another, unexpected voice uttered an angry stream of muttered profanity.

"Chris," Ellie murmured beside me, reclaiming my attention.

"Ellie?" I whispered, leaning over her and pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead, smoothing her hair away from her face. "Ellie. Wake up, darling."

She stirred but didn't wake. "What?"

"Wake up, sweetheart." I kissed her forehead again. "_Please_."

The murmured voices below quieted suddenly, except for one. "She's waking up." Two sets of footsteps shuffled closer to the stairs, pausing at the bottom.

My eyes never left Ellie's face, and I drew in a sharp breath when she blinked once, twice, and then finally opened her eyes. I could see she was in pain as she squinted up at me. Her hand snaked out of from beneath the blankets, reaching for mine. She trembled as our fingers intertwined. "What happened?" she rasped, struggling to pull herself up but immediately sagging back toward the bed. I carefully caught her with my free arm, gently lying her back down.

"Darling, what do you remember?"

She closed her eyes again for a moment, her breath rushing out through her teeth in a hiss. "Victoria. She was...oh my god, Charlie." Her eyes flashed open again. "What happened to Charlie?"

I shook my head, touching her cheek softly. "Charlie is fine." I bit my lip, remembering his angry rants as we made our way back to the house. "Well, he's unharmed."

She laughed weakly, acknowledging the thoughts in my head. "Ugh. What are we going to do about _that_?"

Again I shook my head. This problem was not hers to fix. "You needn't worry about him, love. That's your family's mess to fix."

"But..."

"Your father is here, Ellie. He arrived just a few moments before you woke up."

Her eyes opened wide now, and she forced herself up again, this time bracing her back against the headboard. "Daddy's _here_? How? How long was I out, Chris?" She grabbed my arm and twisted my forearm to see my watch. "Shit," she groaned. She looked toward the window where the moonlight streamed in, providing the only illumination in the room.

"Shh." I reclaimed her hand and gave a soft squeeze. "It's only been a few hours, Ellie. Don't worry."

She nodded, pinching the bridge of her nose. Suddenly, her eyes flashed open again and she was staring at the door. "Christopher, why is _Edward_ here?"

I shrugged, unconcerned. "Well, it is his mess, isn't it?" A growl from the stairs was followed by a sharp reprimand. Ellie pulled her knees up to her chest, cringing and covering her face with her hands. "Sorry, love. But it's true. This isn't your fault. Your only job right now is to heal, okay?"

The top of her head bobbed as she nodded, and I bit my lip to contain my own growl when I saw where the part in her hair revealed the angry red line that remained on her scalp. Her hand flew to the back of her head automatically to touch the spot and she hissed and yanked it back quickly. "Fuck. How bad am I, Chris?"

"You're going to be fine, Ellie," I said, struggling to control my thoughts. I didn't want to upset her so soon.

She eyed me speculatively, and then burst from the bed, sprinting toward the bathroom. I was stunned by how fast she moved, and the time I got to the bathroom door, she was standing in front of the mirror, her eyes wide with horror. She held her hands over her throat, following the patterns of the bruises left by her attacker. I ghosted to her side, carefully pulling her hands down and taking her in my arms. She turned and pressed her face against my chest. I felt her tears through my shirt before her breaths became ragged and I tightened my arms around her as she cried.

"You're going to be fine," I repeated quietly. "You're safe, darling. She won't hurt you again." She sniffed and shook her head against me.

"I don't think she was going to kill me," she mumbled.

I struggled to keep my muscles relaxed as I internally recoiled at the words. "What?"

"She wasn't going to kill me," she said again. This time she pulled back to look up at me. I tried to smooth away the wet tracks from her tears as she spoke. "She would have left me alive so I could make sure Edward saw what she did to Charlie." She shuddered and I carefully pulled her head back against me.

I tried to swallow the bile and venom that was burning in my mouth at the thought of anyone hurting my love, and the gnawing guilt that I hadn't gotten there in time to protect her. "I'm sorry, Ellie. I'm so sorry I didn't get there fast enough."

"Don't Chris," she whispered, her fingers curling into me. She heaved a great sigh, sagging slightly in my arms. I hooked her legs over my arm, lifting her up and carrying her back to our bed. I settled her back down on the mattress, careful to lay her on her side so she wasn't putting unnecessary pressure on the back of her head, and climbed in beside her.

"Rest, love."

She snuggled up against me, her arms tucked tightly around her chest. I wrapped my own arms around her, keeping her as close to me as I could. I knew Carlisle would be anxious to see her but for now, he would have to wait. "When do you have to leave?"

"I don't, Ellie. I'm not going anywhere."

"Chris, you have to meet your student in the morning, don't you?"

"It doesn't matter. I will call in sick. I'm not leaving you."

She sighed. "Christopher. It's only a couple of hours, and then you're done, right?" I nodded, my chin brushing against her hair. "I will be fine. Dad's here and..." she hesitated. "Anyway, I won't be alone."

"Fine," I sighed. I didn't want to argue with her, and logically I knew she would be all right without me for such a short period of time. She was quiet for several minutes after that, and I thought perhaps she had finally fallen asleep, until she she tensed again in my arms. "Ellie?"

"The bruises."

"Are you in pain, honey? Tell me what I can do." I felt her head shake back and forth against me.

"No, it's not that. I just realized though," she craned her neck to look at me, "we're supposed to leave on our trip on Saturday. I will still look like a punching bag then."

I winced at her cavalier description. "We can postpone. I will move the interviews I've scheduled for next week. Or cancel them. The only one I really care about is the one in Colorado anyway." I kissed her forehead.

"But what if..."

"Shh," I cut her off. "Don't worry about it. Let's see how you feel over the next couple of days and then we will figure it out, okay? I won't make any changes yet. Deal?"

She bit her lip but gave a small nod. "Deal." As her muscles once again started to relax, I listened to her quiet breaths slow and deepen and thought of the plans we'd made, hoping that as she drifted to sleep she knew that there was nothing I would let stand in the way of our life together.

* * *

**EPOV**

I rolled over and stretched, regretting the movement immediately. My hand covered the back of my neck as it throbbed. I sucked in a deep breath and blinked several times, my eyes struggling to adjust to the daylight-brightened bedroom. I looked at the clock when I realized I was alone in the room, slowly recalling the whispered conversation with Christopher before I'd fallen asleep. My head turned toward the door as my mind registered someone's approach.

"Come in," I said softly. The door slowly opened and my father looked in hesitantly. I hugged my knees to my chest and offered a small smile. "Hi, Daddy."

He came to sit on the edge of the bed, reaching his hand to lightly cup my face. "Ellie." He leaned forward to kiss my forehead, brushing his thumb over my cheek. "How do you feel?" His gaze cast down over my neck, despite my crouched position which hid much of the bruising from his view. "Are you in pain?"

I shook my head. "Not much, I guess."

He frowned, assuming that I was downplaying my discomfort. I saw in his memory that Christopher had allowed him to have a look at me while I was sleeping. "I'm sorry. He wanted to wait until you were awake, but after Edward described the bruising I'm afraid I insisted. I just wanted to make sure you were healing."

"It's okay," I whispered, smiling a little. "Is Mom here?"

He shook his head, though I already knew the answer. "She's worried sick about you, but Jasper didn't think it wise for so many of us to leave there right now."

"Then why bring Edward?"

He brushed his thumb once more against my cheek before folding his hands in his lap. "Well, Christopher was right before. Charlie is..." he paused, wearily rubbing his forehead, "well, he's not your issue to deal with."

I raised my eyebrows. "And has Charlie been...dealt with?"

"Not yet. He allowed me to make sure he was physically unharmed, but otherwise has taken to one of your guest rooms here." I nodded, noting the subtle acknowledgment in his words - whether intentional or not I couldn't tell - that this house was now mine _and_ Christopher's. I looked down, wishing I could hide the rings so brazenly displayed on my left hand.

As if following my train of thought, my father's eyes dropped downward, and I held my breath as he looked at my hand. I leaned back a little as he looked up, bracing for his reaction. He gave a sad smile, and I knew it took tremendous effort even to offer that much. He cleared his throat and looked away.

"When?"

"Um. Almost six weeks ago." I pulled my left hand back and out of sight and chewed nervously on my right thumbnail. His thoughts were carefully controlled as he flicked his eyes back to my face once more before standing to leave the room.

"You should have at least told your mother."

I knew I should have let it drop. I could hear my brother, whose thoughts I'd hardly noticed since I woke up, warning me in my mind to control the anger that quickly raged to a boil in my veins. I tried to bite back my bitter reply, but as my father's hand's reached for the door handle, I let the anger win.


	7. Reckoning

**ChPOV**

It was just after one by the time I got back to the house after finishing my final student evaluation for the term. As I walked in the front door, I was struck by how quiet it seemed - I gathered most of our visitors must have gone out. I left my belongings by the front door and closed it behind me, turning to head upstairs to check on Ellie. I took the steps two-at-a-time, and knocked quietly on our bedroom door. No answer came, so I pushed in slowly, closing it behind me. I couldn't see Ellie, but I could hear the shower running in the en suite bathroom - the clothes that I'd carefully dressed her in the previous evening lay discarded on the floor.

I sat down on the edge of the bed, pulling off my shoes and socks quickly. I shed my jacket and knocked on the bathroom door, loosening my tie with my other hand.

"Ellie?" I called as I looked in, and once again I received no answer. I yanked my tie over my head and chucked it onto the bathroom counter before reaching for the curtain. "Sweetheart, are you okay?" I would leave her be if she wanted to be alone, but I was starting to worry. A small sniff from behind the curtain was quickly followed by another, and then another. I tugged the curtain back and dropped to my knees to reach for her.

"Darling what's wrong?" She was crouched on the floor of the shower, curled into a ball with her head tucked against her knees under the stream of water, which ran ice-cold against her skin. "Ellie?" The quiver of her shoulders as she cried was her only acknowledgment. I quickly discarded my clothes and climbed in beside her, standing her up and pulling her against me, turning us so that the freezing water hit only me and reaching back to turn the hot water on slowly. As the temperature of the water rose, I stepped back further, letting her body gradually adjust to the warmth. She shuddered delicately against me, still struggling to hold in her tears.

I pushed her hair back and turned her again so that her back was now against the water, gently tipping her head to rinse her hair. I reached for her shampoo and squeezed a little into my palm, rubbing my hands together before carefully running my fingers through the long, tangled strands. Her eyes were still closed, but as I gently massaged her scalp, I could see the tense lines around them starting to relax. She heaved a great sigh as I washed away the suds in her hair and repeated the motions with her conditioner.

When I rinsed her hair again, her eyes fluttered open for the first time since I first found her in the shower, and her lips twitched upward just a bit. I bent down to kiss her once, stroking her cheek with my thumb. I gave her a small smile when I pulled away. Her own smile faded as she drew in a shaky breath, her troubles still lurking behind her eyes. I plucked her bodywash from the shelf and worked a lather into my hands, tilting her head slightly upward and drawing my soapy hands carefully along the purpled skin of her neck. She gave a small sigh as I worked my fingers along her shoulders and arms and across her chest. I washed her entire body without a word, pulling her against my chest when I was done.

Her body relaxed against mine and her hands locked behind my neck. I smoothed her hair back from her face as she reached up on her tip toes to kiss me lightly. She giggled when she felt my body's response to her, and I smiled sheepishly. Her mouth claimed mine again, and without thinking I nudged her legs apart, sliding my leg between them and groaning as I felt the heat of her sex against my thigh. I struggled to pull away as her teeth pulled at my lower lip. "Ellie, are you sure?"

She twisted her fingers into my hair, pulling my head back. "Please," she whispered before her mouth attacked my neck with wet kisses and bites. I needed no more encouragement and lifted her up. She locked her legs around my waist, smiling as I gently pressed her against the shower wall and settled myself deep within her. Her eyes closed again - but this time I saw no stress etched across her face as she let me set a careful pace, reminding her with my mind and my body that I would always be here to put the world back together when everything fell apart.

* * *

**EPOV**

"Do you want to tell me what happened?"

"Hm?" My eyes met Christopher's in the bathroom mirror as I combed my wet hair. He frowned as he toweled his hair dry.

"I said, do you want to tell me what happened?"

"Oh." I shrugged and turned my attention back to my own reflection, dragging the comb through another section of hair. I could feel him watching me as I considered my response. I set the comb down and placed my palms against the counter, studying the sink as I spoke. "I had a fight with my dad." Christopher dropped the towel and stepped closer, lightly placing his hands on my shoulders.

"About?"

I sighed and looked over my shoulder at him with a skeptical arch of my eyebrow. "What do you think?" My eyes dropped down to his left hand and flicked back up to his face.

His eyes widened as he understood. "I'm sorry, Ellie. I should have been here for that conversation."

I snorted. "It wasn't much of a conversation, Chris." I turned around to face him, leaning back against the counter and nervously adjusting the towel I'd wrapped around myself.

He took my hands. "Will you tell me what he said that upset you?"

I worried my lip with my teeth and stared at his shoulders, squeezing my eyes shut as if that would prevent the memory from replaying in my mind.

_"You should have at least told your mother."_

I had barely been aware of my nails digging into my palms as my hands clenched into tiny, tight, fists. My father's words echoed so loudly between my ears it was as if he were shouting them over and over. Edward pleaded with me to keep my temper but it was no use.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I snapped. "I _tried_. I called every single one of you, Dad, and not one of you could be bothered to pick up your goddamned phones." I watched as he turned back to face me, his eyes wide with surprise at my tirade. "What did you think I was going to do? Wait around until I was declared fit to return to the family to livemy _life_?"

"Ellie, that's not what I meant..."

"Then what _did_ you mean Dad? You think I didn't know it would hurt you and mom? But _you're_ the one who told me to be happy. And then you kicked me out." I pushed past him, slamming the door back against the wall as I made my escape from the room, barreling past Charlie who'd peeked out from behind the guest room door. I got to the bottom of the steps before Carlisle caught up with me, stopping me with a hand closed around my elbow. I whirled around to face him and yanked against his hold. "Let me go."

I pressed my palms against my eyes, leaning into Christopher's chest as he pulled me against him. "What happened after that, love?" he murmured into my hair. I sighed and buried my head in the space between his neck and shoulder as he bent to hug me closer. I took a deep breath; the security of his embrace soothed away the last vestiges of my anxiety.

"Well, it probably would have settled down after that - he saw I was barely holding it together and he hates it when I cry." I laughed a little, wiping away a new tear. "But, of course _Edward_ heard the whole thing..." I shook my head.

"Where are they, by the way?" Christopher wondered aloud when I paused.

"Um, they took Charlie to lunch." I shrugged. "They are working on their exit strategy, I think." At this, Christopher pulled me back from him enough to see my face.

"They are going to talk to him about all of this in _public_?"

I shook my head again. "I don't _think_ so. I think they are going to propose their plans to return him to Washington. Edward had been on the phone with Alice while Dad and I were...um...talking. It sounded like Alice thinks that Charlie will cooperate and let them drive him home - as long as they promise to tell him _something_. What that will be, I don't know. And I'm sure he still thinks he's going to find Bella at the end of it all...so when he doesn't, who knows what he will do."

Christopher's eyebrows inched closer and closer to his hairline as I explained what I'd deduced about their plans. "That's...going to be problematic, isn't it?"

I shrugged and looked away with narrowed eyes. "Not our problem."

He nodded but I knew he wasn't entirely convinced. "And the Denali's?"

My head cocked to the side. "Sorry?"

"Where are they?"

"Oh, right." I bit my lip. "I think they cleared out at some point during round one with Dad."

"Ah. So round two, then?"

I closed my eyes and leaned against his chest again. "Edward started railing on me that I should...I don't know...be grateful? That his life is such a mess?"

He wrapped his arms around me again, and I felt the effort it took him not to tense with anger. "Explain, please?"

I shrugged - or tried to, his hold was so tight my shoulders just flinched a bit. "It was the same thing he was thinking that night in Forks, with Bella...he resents the shit out of me right now." Christopher was starting to understand, but he just nodded his head and waited for me to continue. "He's not wrong, really. I _did_ come out of all of this with everything I could have ever wanted." I reached my arms around Christopher's waist and hugged him closer.

"You feel guilty," Christopher murmured.

I sighed. "Yeah, I guess I do. I got a look at what the last few weeks have been like. He's been trying so hard to keep it together, but every time she lets them see how much she's hurting, or when she freaks out because she wants to get out and hunt...er, _properly_...it's killing him. She's not angry with him," I snorted, "but of course that doesn't stop him from hating himself." I paused, closing my eyes and concentrating on my breathing as Christopher stroked my hair. "He has the worst guilt complex of anyone on the planet, I swear. Even when she tries to reassure him he won't hear it."

"Did it seem like things have gotten any better? I mean, they were able to send two-thirds of the Denalis here and then Carlisle and Edward..."

"I _think_ so." I giggled a little, remembering a very specific memory that Edward hadn't meant to share. "I think Emmett would tell you that things have gotten a _lot_ better." I laughed harder as Christopher tried to parse my words. I looked up at him with a raised eyebrow but he just shrugged, totally lost. "Um. Apparently she's calmed down enough that they were able to um...well, I was going to say sleep together but that's not entirely accurate."

His eyes widened and his brows pulled up as he understood. "_Oh_," he finally said. "I didn't realize that they hadn't..."

"Mm, no. That would have been a little difficult, I think."

"Right. Of course." He wrinkled his nose, remembering Bella's scent when she came over that night in Forks. He grinned sheepishly. "Sorry. But she was definitely...unusual."

I laughed. "Don't worry, I know." My head twisted toward the bathroom door as several minds suddenly came within my range. I looked up at Christopher with a sigh. "Dad, Edward, and Charlie are coming back soon."

He heaved a sigh and nodded, pulling me in for one more kiss. I listened to their thoughts as we slipped back into the bedroom to get dressed. Dad was thinking about the route they would take back to Washington, which made me a little anxious because I assumed he was trying to keep me out. Edward was pensive, unsurprisingly. Charlie's thoughts were resigned and exhausted - he knew that no matter what information he actually got out of Carlisle and Edward, he wasn't likely to ever see his daughter again. I felt sick at the heartache I could feel from him.

Christopher reached for my hand as he opened the bedroom door. I flashed him a smile in thanks - I was nervous about seeing my father and brother again, but I wanted to see them off as peacefully as possible.

"Don't worry, Ellie," Christopher whispered. "I've got you."


	8. Hiding

**ChPOV**

I pulled on jeans and a T-shirt and turned back to face Ellie, who had frozen in front of the new dresser I'd bought for her a few days after our return to Ithaca. Her eyes were wide and she appeared entirely lost in thought; whether hers or someone else's I didn't know. Her knuckles were white from the death grip on the towel she'd wrapped around herself, and her other hand was spread over her neck, covering the marks left by her attacker.

The bruises had spread further across of her neck and collarbone in the few hours I'd spent away from her. Where her skin had previously been colored by deep blacks and blues and purples, the violent splotches now mixed with putrid greens and yellows. Even though the change in color indicated that the marks were healing it seemed to deepen the effect. Now, as I watched her anxious movements, I wanted to go to her side and pull her hand away, but a heavy tension had suddenly risen between us. I knew that she needed some physical distance. Instead I watched her surreptitiously as her eyes seemed to refocus, settling on the drawers in front of her as she debated what to wear.

She slowly opened the top drawer, pulling out a simple pair of light blue cotton panties and sliding them up over her hips with one hand, still clutching the towel around her. She finally let it drop to put on a bra before quickly donning a pair of dark gray leggings. She rifled through another drawer, looking for a shirt and apparently not finding anything suitable. I watched as she shoved the drawer closed again, chewing her lip. Her eyes darted to her left and she flitted across the room to a small pile of clean laundry, fishing out my Cornell sweatshirt from the bottom of the stack and pulling it over her head.

I leaned my head slightly to the side as I watched her now. I knew she must be conscious of my attention, burdened as she was by her particular ability, but she showed no outward sign of her awareness. She avoided my gaze as she gracefully crossed the floor of our bedroom, coming to a stop again in front of her mirror. Her mouth scrunched up and to the side as she pulled her damp hair free from the oversized garment that hung from her slender frame before tying a messy knot loosely atop her head. Her hands slowly dropped down to the neck of the shirt, her fingers curling around the bulk of fabric, tugging it back and forth as her brows pulled together in concentration. Her fingers stretched back further, and for a moment, I thought she was going to pull the hood up over her head.

When the front door opened, her fingers froze, her fidgeting forgotten. I quickly strode toward the bedroom door, reaching one hand toward the knob and the other to claim one of hers. Her eyes finally met mine and she flashed a timid smile. I gently squeezed her fingers as they linked with mine.

"Don't worry, Ellie. I've got you." _Always._

"Thanks," she breathed. She pulled her tiny hand from mine as we descended the stairs together, her fingers again tugging at the bulky neck of the hooded sweatshirt that she was wearing. With her arms covering her chest and the shirt held up to her chin now, she edged closer to the wall as we walked down. Her eyes darted from side to side, frantically searching the space at the bottom of the stairs. She jumped when I reclaimed her hand, tugging her down the last few steps and into the kitchen.

She looked around, confused by our sudden change in direction, but I could see the relief that there was no one else in the room. I closed the distance between us and took her face in my hands. "Talk to me, love."

She stared at my shoulder. "Chris, what?"

I shook my head. "Ellie, you're hiding." I tried to smooth away the worried lines around her eyes as she looked up at me. "It's okay, love. I just want to know what's going on in your head. Tell me what you need."

I knew that Edward would be listening, and I knew that Carlisle would soon wonder what was keeping his daughter from coming into the living room, but honestly, I did not care. Her eyes were wide with the fear that she was suddenly allowing me to see, and all I could do was hold her in my arms.

_Say the word and I will ask them to leave now. You and me, baby. I've got you._

She shrank against me with a deep sigh, and out of habit, I brought one of my hands back up to her face, slowly trailing my fingers from her cheek, over her jaw, and along the curve of her neck. When my thumb lightly brushed over her throat she froze. Her spine was steel-straight and she pulled her arms into her chest, pushing me back away from her.

"Let go," she whimpered. "I can't breathe, let me go."

"Ellie?" My hands slid to her arms as I tried to see her face; she shoved at my chest again.

"Stop, please. Let me _go."_

Edward and Carlisle appeared in the doorway to the kitchen. "Christopher, let go of her," Edward ordered, his eyes wide and unseeing as he read Ellie's panicked thoughts. "_Now_."

I dropped my hold and stepped back, kneeling beside her as she crumpled to the ground.

* * *

**EPOV**

It felt like I was suddenly trapped in someone else's body - someone else's _mind - _as I struggled to escape the arms of the man who only a second ago I'd clung to as if my entire life depended on it. And indeed, my entire life _did_ depend on him now.

But as his hands lovingly stroked the skin I so desperately wanted to hide - the visual evidence of just how close my supposedly immortal life came to ending - it wasn't Christopher that I felt touching my neck. It was Victoria, squeezing the air from my lungs and the life from my body. I felt the blood vessels bursting beneath my skin, and the fire in my chest when I couldn't pull in a sufficient breath. I felt the throbbing in my head as my vision began to falter.

"Ellie, you're safe, now." I pressed my palms against the cool kitchen tile, squeezing my eyes shut, gasping for air. "Ellie. You're okay. Victoria is gone. Christopher and Garrett got to you in time, and Victoria is dead. No one is going to hurt you now." I concentrated on my brother's familiar voice. "That's good Ellie. You're remembering now."

"Ellie? Can you hear me, love? I'm sorry, baby. I didn't mean to frighten you." I felt Christopher's hand lightly touch my knee, and I cursed my backward instincts as my body flinched away.

"Give her a minute, Christopher, she's still coming out of it."

My breathing had finally slowed, and the pounding in my head had lessened enough that I was able to force my eyes to open. I blinked several times toward the floor, studying my fingers as they curled against the hard tile. I leaned back against my heels, folding my shaking hands in my lap. When I looked up, I coward slightly from the intense, concerned, stares of the three men who were kneeling on the floor in front of me. My eyes fell on my father's face first, then my brother's, then finally flashed to Christopher's.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered. I knew that though he'd never say it aloud, it had hurt him deeply when I flinched away before. "I don't know what happened." He smiled and shook his head.

"Don't apologize. Can I come closer?"

I sniffed and nodded and he quickly crawled across the few feet between us. He sat cross-legged next to me, carefully extending his arms.

"Christopher - don't push her," Carlisle admonished, but I silenced him with a shake of my head.

"It's okay, Dad," I whispered, and scooted closer to my husband, leaning against his shoulder as he carefully wrapped his arms around me. I looked up at Christopher. "I'm sorry. I wasn't...I don't know what that _was_..."

"Ellie." My eyes flicked up to my father's face. "It seemed like you were remembering what happened, with Victoria." I flinched again, this time into Christopher and not away from him. I looked up again in time to see my father look to Edward, who nodded in confirmation. Carlisle's mouth tightened into a thin line. His memory of the episode flashed through his mind as he went into doctor-mode. _Post-traumatic stress_, he thought, earning another nod from my brother who evidently agreed with the assessment.

I sniffed and wiped my eyes. "What does that mean?" I'd heard the term before, but I didn't really know what it entailed. I tugged the collar of Christopher's sweatshirt up again, shrinking against his side. Christopher looked down at me and then toward my father and brother.

"What does what mean?"

Carlisle looked at me for permission to speak freely. I nodded and waved my hand impatiently for him to explain. He took a deep breath. "What I was thinking, Christopher, is that Ellie may be dealing with a bit of post-traumatic stress after the ordeal with Victoria."

I felt Christopher tense, and he pressed a gently kiss on the top of my head. "Oh." He shifted slightly beside me as he considered Carlisle's words. "What does that mean?" he asked, echoing my question.

"Well, it means different things for different people." He smiled gently at me. "For example, Ellie has a tendency to have some pretty intense dreams relating to...well, other stressful events..."

Christopher looked at me curiously. "You do?" I bit my lip and glanced up at, hesitantly meeting his worried gaze.

"Um yeah. Mostly about when I was, um...born? I haven't had one of those in a while, but I kind of freak out a bit..." My voice trailed off and I pulled my knees to my chest, covering my face with my hands. I felt Christopher's hand on my back, slowly rubbing up and down the length of my spine. He turned his attention back to my father.

"So you think that will happen? The dreams, I mean?"

"Possibly. Or she might have a sudden recollection like what happened a few minutes ago." My father paused, and I saw in his thoughts that he was looking at me now. "Ellie? Can you tell us what you remember, so maybe we can figure out what triggered the memory?"

I shuddered, pulling my legs in tighter and shaking my head.

Edward cleared his throat. "I think it was when you touched her neck, Christopher." There was no evidence of accusation in his tone, which surprised me. "Ellie? Can you tell us if that's right?" When I didn't answer, he plowed ahead. "Her mind switched gears completely, it seemed like she was reliving the experience in her head."

Christopher's hand froze on my back, and he swallowed roughly as he remembered the simple gesture that was as automatic to him now as breathing. "I'm sorry, Ellie," he whispered. "I saw how you'd been trying to cover yourself...I should have realized..."

My head lifted from my hands and I reached to touch his cheek. "Don't, Chris. It's not your fault." He offered a weak smile and held my hand against his face.

"You just tell me what you need, love. Okay?" I nodded, and he leaned in slowly, watching me to make sure it was okay, and pressed his lips to my forehead. I had almost forgotten that my father and brother were still sitting on the floor with us.

I drew in a deep breath, taking comfort in Christopher's scent and smiling at him. "I think right now I would like to go for a hunt." Chris nodded and kissed my head once more before helping me to my feet. I glanced around him and met my father's eyes. "We can talk when we get back?"

* * *

**ChPOV**

Ellie seemed to feel a bit better after she'd fed. We didn't talk as we made our way into the forest and I left much more distance between us than I normally would have preferred, not wanting to overwhelm her or bring on another episode. After we had each had our fill, she grabbed my hand and tucked herself under my arm. I sighed with relief at the contact; she didn't move from my side for the entire trek back to the house. When we arrived, Carlisle was waiting for her in the living room and followed her downstairs to the basement where they could speak with relative privacy. I watched her walk out of the room and then turned to go grab my bag from the foyer, startling a bit when I noticed Charlie sitting quietly in a chair by the window.

I nodded in his direction. "Charlie."

"Christopher," came his gruff reply. His eyes flashed toward where Ellie and her father had just been standing. "She okay?"

"She will be." He nodded and turned his attention back toward the window. I retrieved my bag and walked back into the kitchen, sitting down at the counter and turning on my laptop. I opened up a new email from the realtor I'd contacted in Colorado and started filtering through a series of listings she thought might meet the parameters I'd provided.

"Colorado?" Edward inquired from the doorway.

"Yeah," I replied, still facing my computer screen. I made a face as I flipped through the pictures from one listing, quickly scratching that house off the list of possibilities. "I"m interviewing Boulder in a couple weeks."

"Carlisle mentioned that you two have a trip planned - it sounded like you have quite a few interviews lined up along the way."

I shifted in my seat to face him, nodding my head. "I do, but we've both kind of settled on the idea of living around the Boulder area, so we will likely wind up there regardless." I shrugged. "If the job doesn't work out that's not really an issue."

"Do you think traveling so soon is a good idea?"

I sighed and leaned against the back of the stool, opening another link. "I told her last night that we would see how she felt after a couple of days. But I am planning to reschedule some meetings I'd scheduled for next week to give her time to heal." I chuckled and shook my head. "She was worried about how she _looked_. Obviously I'm worried now that it might be too much, too soon."

Edward pursed his lips in thought and pulled our his cellphone. "Hang on a second." He disappeared around the corner, and I heard him murmuring quietly into his phone. I turned my attention back to my computer screen, bookmarking a couple of the more promising listings to show Ellie later. I heard Edward thank someone on the other end of the phone after asking them to give his love to Bella. A moment later he reappeared in the kitchen.

"Alice says you can cancel your other interviews, if you want."

I turned around again, confused. "Er, I'm glad I have her permission?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "No, I mean, she saw you getting the job in Boulder. I'm sorry, I hope you don't mind, but I thought if it would make things easier for you both I could just ask her what she's seen."

"Oh, huh. I hadn't thought of that." I wasn't sure whether Ellie had thought of it either, but even if she had she probably wouldn't have called her sister.

"Alice isn't angry with her." I felt my brow furrow as I realized Edward was responding to my thoughts.

"You know, I'm used to that now with Ellie, but it's weirder when you do it."

He grinned. "Sorry. Force of habit."

"Alice isn't mad? Ellie assumed that since we got married quietly Alice was upset with her."

Edward shrugged. "Alice doesn't like to see Carlisle or Esme upset, and she knew this would be a little tricky for them. Don't worry about that though, Christopher. Ultimately they just want to see her happy, and she is."

I nodded. I hoped that whatever Carlisle and Ellie were discussing downstairs, that he would convey this to her as well. I knew it would mean more coming from her father after their argument earlier. I tilted my head to the side, regarding Edward speculatively.

"And you?" I deliberately recalled her earlier comments about her brother.

Edward winced, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I did...say those things to her. That's true."

"That hurt her," I said bluntly. "A lot. She's been frantic worrying about you and Bella these last several weeks. Especially with as little as she's actually heard from anyone." I crossed my arms over my chest.

He looked down at the floor, and I struggled to keep my thoughts calm as I again remembered the pain in Ellie's eyes earlier. "I know that, and I am truly sorry for hurting her." He chuckled darkly. "I'm sure she's told you that I don't exactly handle stress very well myself." He looked up and through the window, his eyes narrowed and suddenly far away. "Obviously." He shook off whatever dark thoughts had momentarily possessed him. When he looked back at me his eyes were clear; resolved. "I will speak with her and apologize before we go."


	9. Home

**EPOV**

"Yes, Mom." I rolled my eyes as my mother chattered in my ear about paint colors and window trimming. "Well Christopher has a decorator in mind already to help sort that out. I sent you some of their ideas this morning. Did you check your email?"

I drummed my nails against the hard plastic chair as she went to grab her laptop.

"So," my mother said as she waited for her email to load. "Are you excited? Are you nervous about the whole teaching thing?"

Christopher chuckled beside me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. He and I had discussed this several times over the last several weeks as we made our plans. I had agreed to take on a teaching-assistant position in the English department as a part of my masters program. I would be teaching an introductory writing course to a small class of freshman and sophomore undergrads. The material was easy enough, though I still worried that I would make a fool of myself.

"Yes," I said, fiddling with the strap of my carryon. "And yes, I suppose." It was hard to say more as we sat in the crowded airport waiting area. Any moment they would be calling us to board our connection through Minneapolis en route to Denver. "Listen, Mom, we're going to be boarding soon."

"Okay, sweetie. Be safe."

The call to board came across the speakers just I ended the call. I shoved the phone in my pocket and picked up my bags.

"Ready?" Christopher slid his fingers between mine. I smiled up at him.

"Absolutely."

When our plane touched down in Denver I heaved a huge sigh and slowly stretched out my fingers, which had been tightly curled around Christopher's forearm. I was an anxious flier, despite having flown many times before. Christopher found this rather amusing.

This was our third and final trip to Colorado from New York. We'd first flown out for his interview after Alice's revelation to Edward that we needn't worry about whether he would get the job. He received an offer after two days of meetings, and he gladly accepted. We stayed on in the area for another week to search for a house.

The process of finding a house had been much more arduous than I expected. Price was not an issue for either of us, so I had anticipated that we would easily find something suitable. What I quickly realized was how difficult it would be to find a house that wasn't outrageously out of place for a young college professor and his wife but that still afforded enough space and privacy that we could feel at ease in our own home.

On our second trip out, we settled on a beautiful four-bedroom house nestled between several mountain peaks. The rolling hills that gave way to the nearby summits could be seen from every angle through the enormous windows that could found along every wall.

Before we returned to Ithaca for the last time, we'd picked out furnishings for the house and made arrangements for everything to be delivered and assembled prior to our arrival tonight. As I looked out the small window of the plane, my fingers tapped against Christopher's arm once again - though this time my fidgeting was from excitement rather then fear. Christopher captured my fingers in his hand and pulled them to his lips, smiling at me as I turned to face him.

"Welcome home, baby."

I grinned and kissed his cheek before he slid carefully from his seat to retrieve out bags from the overhead compartment. We filed off the plane a few minutes later, trailing behind the line of weary travelers as we made our way to the baggage claim. He loaded a little cart with our belongings.

"This way, love." He nodded toward a man dressed in black holding a sign with "Dawling," printed across, and helped load the trunk of the driver's Towncar and confirmed our address. As we sped off into the night, I snuggled against Christopher's side, pulling my knees up on the seat as he tucked me under his arm. I felt his chest vibrate with a soft chuckle when I yawned, dozing as the city lights gave way to darkened mountain peaks around us.

* * *

**ChPOV**

I had carried Ellie into the house after setting the bags just inside the foyer. She woke up enough to change for bed, falling asleep again immediately as her head hit the pillow. I brushed her hair from her face and lightly kissed her forehead before darting back downstairs. I roamed the house for a few minutes, admiring the views and making sure that the caretaker we'd hired had followed the instructions I'd provided over the last few weeks.

Everything seemed to be in order - right down to the programmable coffee maker I had delivered, already set to brew for Ellie in the morning. I was looking forward to exploring the area with Ellie, and even more so to claiming the house properly as our own. I shook my head wistfully, ignoring the temptation to wake my sleeping beauty.

The traveling and planning we'd been immersed in lately had worn her out; I was glad we were here for good now so that she could get settled before preparations began for the semester start. I knew she was nervous about her new roles here - especially when it came to our relationship finally being public.

I knew it was the Cullen way to blend in as much as possible but that most of the family steered clear of too much human involvement. That was wise for any of our kind when mingling in the human world. However, since it was just the two of us here, the need to limit contact was slightly lessened, as long as we were careful. Luckily, the faculty in my department were all fairly young and there would be plenty of opportunities over the next couple of months for her to get to know my new colleagues and their spouses.

Once I was satisfied that nothing was amiss, I switched off the lights and locked the doors. I grabbed the bags from the foyer and headed back upstairs, quietly unpacking as Ellie slept. When I finished I stowed the now-empty suitcases on the floor of the massive walk-in closet, to be tossed into the attic later. I sat down on the edge of the bed, pulling off my shoes and socks. I stripped down to my boxers and climbed in the bed, sliding in next to her carefully so as not to wake her.

She rolled against me as I settled myself beside her, a relaxed smile on her lips. I pulled her against my chest, rolling slightly to my back so she lay over me, tucking the blankets securely over her. For hours she slept peacefully, her breath tickling my chest as I let my fingers wander from the crown of her head down her spine and back again. I watched the sky brighten through the massive windows as the morning light rose over the mountains, and I grew increasingly eager to see my love's waking smile dawn across her face.

Ellie stirred against me before the sun had fully risen, and as her breathing sped up I assumed she was finally starting to wake. But her muscles started to tense inexplicably a moment later. My still heart filled with dread when I realized what was actually happening.

As Carlisle had predicted, Ellie had started to experience traumatic nightmares shortly after our visitors left New York. It wasn't every night, but when the dreams occurred there was no mistaking the mental and emotional toll on Ellie. She would wake up flailing and crying, and no amount of soothing seemed to pull her out until her subconscious was finished tormenting her.

Her arms began to twitch under my hold, and I let her go immediately, knowing she would roll away from me a few seconds later. Sure enough, she pushed herself away, violently shifting from her side to her back, her head twisting against the pillow. She didn't yell this time, but I could see the tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Ellie," I whispered, daring to lightly stroke the top her head. She didn't swat me away. "Eleanor, love, you're okay." I touched her hand this time. "It's Christopher. Victoria is gone, and you are home. You are safe."

I couldn't be sure if she could really hear me yet, and I fought against my every instinct to try and shake her awake. After the first of these horrid dreams, I'd called her father in a panic after she'd calmed enough to sleep again, wanting to know what I could possibly do. Unfortunately, there wasn't much to do but wait, but I offered whatever reassurances I could in the hope that eventually my words would get through to her.

Finally with one last whimper, I knew the worst was over. I waited a moment more before reaching for her again, stroking her arm until I felt her muscles relax. When her breathing calmed, I slid a little closer, kissing her shoulder.

"Was it the same?"

She sniffed and nodded, scrubbing her hand against her eyes. "Sorry," she whispered.

I gently coaxed her to roll back to face me. "Ellie you don't need to apologize." I cupped her cheek in my hand. She twisted to kiss my palm and I felt the wetness that lingered on her face from her tears. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She pulled herself closer and buried her face against my chest, shaking her head. "Can you just hold me?"

"Of course, love." I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her against my chest, mimicking the position she'd slept in. "I will hold you for as long as you want."

She sighed, snaking her arms under my back so she could anchor herself to me with her hands on my shoulders. "How's forever?"

I chuckled and kissed her head. "I think I can manage that."

A few minutes later, the coffee maker clicked on, and it wasn't long before the smell that Ellie insisted was appealing wafted into our room. She took a deep breath and picked her head up, an amused smile on her face. "Okay Houdini, how did you manage that?"

I laughed. "They make ones you can pre-program. I thought you might like that."

She grinned and shifted her hips up over mine, pulling her arms out from under me and sliding her fingers behind my neck with one hand and into my hair with the other. Her hips pushed against me and she pressed her lips to mine. "Good idea," she whispered, nibbling on my bottom lip. "Not that I'm in any hurry to get up yet."

* * *

**EPOV**

Christopher grinned and rolled us over, settling between my legs and firmly pressing himself against my center, leaving no doubt about what he wanted. He kissed my lips softly, once, twice, three times before sliding his tongue between them, coaxing my mouth open to him. I rocked my hips up against him as his tongue swept over mine. His answering groan sent tremors through my body as he felt my arousal soaking through the scraps of fabric between us.

His lips brushed lightly against mine once more, and I tangled my fingers in his hair trying to pull his face closer. His hands slid down my ribs to my hips, holding me still as he rubbed his length against me slowly, teasing me until I whimpered his name.

"Yes baby?" He breathed in my ear, licking the space just beneath my jawbone that made me quiver beneath him. Again I tried to pull his face closer to my skin, pressing my head back against the pillow and exposing the arch of my throat to him fully. He swallowed, hesitating for a moment. The heavy lust-filled haze that clouded my brain didn't understand his sudden reluctance at first, until I realized what I'd done. He'd been so careful not to touch my neck for weeks after the episode in the kitchen, but now I felt how he stiffened even more against me when I offered the source of my vulnerability to him so willingly.

I forced my eyes open and met his gaze, brazenly taking his hand from my hip and placing it on my neck, slowly guiding his thumb along the soft curve of my throat. He swallowed again, closing his eyes and dropping his head as I rocked my hips against him. I left his hand there and returned mine to his hair pulling his face back to mine to kiss him deeply.

"I trust you, Christopher. With everything I have. Always know that."

With a hiss he moved down my body, cupping my breasts through the thin camisole I'd worn to bed, pulling my nipples taught through the material. One hand slid down my stomach and slipped beneath my panties and he groaned against the exposed skin of my breast as he dipped his fingers between my wet folds.

"Fuck," he moaned. He pushed two fingers deep inside, curling them against the spot that made me rock helplessly against his hand as he thrust in and out repeatedly. He pressed the heel of his palm against my clit and I grabbed his arm, grinding harder against him. The sudden arch of my spine forced my breasts even closer to his face, and he yanked my top down to free them, squeezing one in his hand and taking the other in his mouth, frantically licking the tightened peak and pulling it between his teeth.

My unintelligible cries turned to frantic gasps as I hurtled closer to release, and he added a third finger inside me to force me over the edge. His fingers slowly brought me back to earth with long, gentle strokes before he pulled them away. I whimpered at their absence.

"Don't worry love," came Christopher's husky reassurance. He pulled my panties off and stripped off his boxers, pulling me over him. "I'm not done with you yet."

I felt like all of my muscles had evaporated from the force of the pleasure he had given me, yet somehow his hands on my hips kept me steady as I straddled him. He breath caught as I settled down over his head, slowly taking him fully within me. His hands slid under my shirt and pulled it over my head. I rolled my hips, throwing my head back at the combined sensations of his cock within me and his body rubbing against my engorged clit. He reached for my breasts, watching me with heavy-lidded eyes as I moved over him, squeezing and kneading my soft skin and stroking my nipples with his thumb.

I leaned down over him, bracing myself with my hands against his muscled abdomen, my hair falling forward over my shoulders. I couldn't watch him anymore; my eyes refused to stay open so I let my head fall forward, thrusting against him and moaning with him as our bodies slid together in perfect sync.

"I love you, Ellie," he whispered as he buried one hand in my hair, pulling my head down to him and capturing my mouth with his before I could respond. Past the point of speaking, he repeated the words over and over in his mind, pouring his love into me from every place where we were connected - mind, body, and soul.


	10. Insatiable

**A/n: fun Friday smut with a touch of feels? Why not. **

* * *

**EPOV**

"Where are you going?" I groaned, reaching for him as he slipped from within me and rolled away. He hopped out of bed before I could grab him and tug him back to me. I shoved my hair back from my face and crossed my arms with a huff. "And why are putting on your boxers?"

He laughed at my exaggerated pout. "One, I am going to get you your coffee. And two, because this house is full of huge windows with no curtains yet. And it's kind of daylight outside." He nodded toward the mountain visible from our bedroom window.

"Um, isn't that why we bought a house in the freaking mountains? There's no one around." I pointed to his underwear. "Drop 'em."

He hooked his thumbs under the waistband and shoved them down over his hips, stepping out of them as they fell to his feet. "Happy now, madam?"

I giggled as I admired him. "Very. Now hurry back."

He disappeared through the door and I flopped back against the pillows, pulling the sheet around me and stretching luxuriously. My nerves still hummed with excitement as my mind recalled our earlier activities. My thighs rubbed together nearly of their own volition as my body responded to the memories, and I couldn't stop my hand from slipping under the sheet, seeking the slick skin between my legs where I was already aching for my husband's touch again.

I rubbed slow circles over my clit, my hips bucking up against the pressure from my own hand. My eyes clenched as I closed my other hand over my breast, rolling my nipple between my thumb and fingers. Christopher's gasp when I shoved two fingers deep inside my pussy was the only announcement of his return to the room. He set the mug he'd brought down and pulled back the sheet, his mouth slack and his cock rock hard as he watched me fuck myself with my own hand. I forced my eyes open to watch him stroking himself as he kneeled beside me.

"Ellie," he groaned. "Come for me baby. I want to see you." His voice cracked with his own need and I shuddered as a new wave of desire scorched through me. I could hear in his mind how much he wanted to take my hand away and replace it with his hands, his tongue, his cock. I almost begged him to, but with a final rough flick of my thumb against my clit my climax ripped through me and my mouth dropped open in a silent cry of pleasure.

"Fucking hell, Ellie," Chris gasped as he pulled my hand away and lined himself up in its place. My eyes flew open as he pushed in, filling me so much more completely than my fingers had before. I locked my legs around him, digging my heels into his ass and clinging to his back with one hand as he thrust into me with abandon.

I held my other hand, wet with my pleasure, up to his lips and he groaned, sucking my fingers greedily into his mouth. I knew he'd been painfully hard as he watched me get myself off while thinking of him, and that he wouldn't be able to hold out long at the desperate pace he'd set. But he knew that I was so worked up for him that it wouldn't matter; I'd follow him into the abyss.

"Ellie...I'm," he groaned, unable to finish his sentence as his hips slammed harder into mine, the staccato pace of his thrusts telling me what his words could not.

"Please baby," I whimpered, desperate to come with him now. His fingers dug into my hips as he held me still, driving into me and sending me back into oblivion. My eyes rolled back and my nails scratched his shoulders as he followed right behind me, holding me against him until his frantic pulsing finally ceased.

Without breaking our connection, his body collapsed over mine, and I nuzzled against his neck, lightly scraping my nails against his scalp. I could feel his chest rising and falling against mine, his breathing was nearly as rapid as my pounding heartbeat, and I listened contentedly as our bodies slowly calmed and found their normal rhythms.

"I don't think I have words for that," Christopher mumbled several minutes later. He slid down just far enough to rest his head against my breast, his curls tickling my chin.

"Mm, no words," I agreed.

"That was fucking hot as hell, though. You didn't even know I was there at first, did you?"

I felt my blush rising from my chest to my cheeks as I shook my head.

He left a trail of kisses along my pink-tinted skin. "I wanted to help, but you seemed like you were managing just fine on your own."

A nervous giggle complimented my now-flaming cheeks. "Uh-huh."

I drew a shaky breath as his cool tongue began tracing lines alone my neck, and I was suddenly grateful that we'd cleared that particular hurdle earlier; I'd almost forgotten what his touch there could do to me.

"Is this okay?" he murmured against the hollow base of my throat, as if he were reading my mind. "You didn't seem to mind before, but if you want me to stop..."

"Don't," I gasped. "Don't stop." I giggled when I felt him twitch against my leg in response to my plea.

"Be careful what you wish for, darling." I moaned quietly as the width of his tongue made a path from my collarbone to my jaw. It tingled where his cool breath blew over the wet track along my skin. "I could spend hours doing this."

* * *

**ChPOV**

The sun had nearly set when Ellie wiggled away from me to climb of bed. I opened my eyes, watching her lithe movements, and smiling to myself when she stopped suddenly. She looked around the unfamiliar space and then back at me.

"You just realized that you don't know where anything is, didn't you love?"

She laughed. "Well all I've seen so far is the bed."

I laughed with her, sitting up against the headboard and patting the space she had just vacated. "I'd be happy to show you more of it."

"Christopher. We've done nothing but each other for the last," her eyes flicked to the clock by the bed, "eleven hours. I need to be vertical for a while."

I raised one eyebrow playfully. "I can think of plenty of ways that we can be vertical together."

She shook her head, her knotted curls bouncing back and forth across her shoulders. "You are impossible."

"I know." I nodded toward the dresser to her left. "I put your stuff in that one. If you don't want it there we can switch, I just figured I would get stuff sorted for now."

She smiled and flitted toward the dresser. "Thanks," she said, glancing over her shoulder. "I'm going to take a shower. You are welcome to be vertical with me there if you'd like."

An hour later, after I'd successfully convinced Ellie not to kick me out of the shower at least three times, I pulled on a clean pair of dark blue boxers and a charcoal gray T-shirt. Ellie smiled at me as she padded out of the bathroom, quickly donning another skimpy camisole-and-shorts set. I closed my fingers around her hipbone and pulled her back to me when she finished combing her hair.

She smiled as I leaned in to kiss her, but pulled away too soon. She poked me in the chest. "I would like one hour to look around. I haven't seen what this place looks like when it's not totally empty."

I tried to hold back a chuckle at her expression. "A whole hour?" I whined jokingly.

She giggled and crossed her arms over her barely concealed breasts. "Yep. One hour." Her grin widened. "Sixty minutes with no touching."

I laughed. "No touching? At all?" Now she was being ridiculous, and I could see from her face that even she didn't think we could pull this off. "This sounds like the making of a Cullen-style wager."

"You think so?" She arched her brow, staring me down with a competitive smirk.

"Oh I do. And you will be sorry, when I'm done with you."

She snorted. "Somehow I doubt that."

"So shall we clarify terms? One full hour. No touching."

She nodded, but I caught a devious gleam in her eyes. "Care to make it interesting?"

"Um, more interesting then trying to keep my hands off you for an entire hour? I'm intrigued."

"Flirting and innuendo are entirely permissible." She watched me as I considered this. "First one to crack loses."

"Or wins, depending on your perspective, love," I countered. "What are we playing for, anyway?"

She shrugged. "Hadn't worked that part out yet. I just thought this would be fun."

I grinned. "Fun?"

"Well, in a ridiculous, impossible kinda way."

"Right." I stepped closer to her until I could feel her breath on my chest. I reached for her face, my hand hovering over her cheek. I watched as she struggled not to lean into my palm. "So then if you win, I spend an entire day bringing you to orgasm with my hands and my mouth."

I watched her breasts rise and fall for several breaths before she could speak again. "And if you win?"

"I will spend an entire day bringing you to orgasm with my hands and my mouth." I ducked my head so that I was eye level with her gaze. The blush that bloomed across her skin made me ache touch her, and the cursed hour hadn't started yet.

"That hardly seems fair," she whispered.

"You're the one that said we were playing for fun, love." I bent down again to whisper in her ear. "Expect to be on your back on the kitchen counter in one hour." I made sure to picture the scene in explicit detail as I turned and strode casually away from her. She swallowed roughly and then I heard her light footfall behind me. I looked back and caught her eye. "So what do you want to see first?"

She grinned. "The kitchen."

* * *

**EPOV**

We hadn't made it more than a few steps from the bedroom before he his hand reached for mine out of habit, but he realized his mistake and jerked it back to his side, winking over his shoulder at me.

"You're not going to trip me up that easily."

I shrugged nonchalantly. "Well, apparently I win either way." He looked at me with an eager gleam in his eyes.

"Again, that all depends on your perspective, love."

I smiled to myself as we walked down the stairs. Between everything that happened in the weeks before we left Ithaca, plus the actual stress of planning our move, it felt like it had been ages since I'd seen Christopher so relaxed. As I listened to his thoughts - he was reliving the hours he spent reacquainting himself with the feel of my neck under his fingers, lips, and tongue - I realized for the first time just how much effort he'd made to be careful with me these last several weeks.

At first, I hadn't even noticed the absence of his touch where I'd been marked by Victoria because I'd been so wrapped up in my own head as I struggled to overcome my memories. But now, it was as if an unseen curtain had been lifted between us. I wasn't naive enough to think that I was fully healed of the anxiety the experience had caused - my dream earlier was proof enough of that. But it seemed I had healed enough to let Christopher back into the places where I felt most vulnerable, and I knew he'd felt the weight of that barrier lifted from both of our shoulders earlier.

I was suddenly overcome with gratitude for the gentle way he'd seen me through, even when I hadn't wanted to admit that I was struggling. Forgetting our silly game, I reached out and touched his shoulder as he reached the bottom of the stairs. He turned around, a goofy grin flashing across his face.

"That was fast."

His smile faltered as I bit my lip, and I could see the fear return to his eyes. He thought I was reliving one of the traumatic memories that had plagued me. I could only shake my head as I struggled to find my words. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him close to me again.

"Can you speak, darling? Please tell me what's wrong."

"No, nothing is wrong," I choked, trying to swallow back my tears. "I just...I love you, Christopher. You've saved my life in so many ways and I don't think you know how much I love you."

I would have said more but he lifted me up with one arm, holding my face with the opposite hand, his mouth plundering mine. "We saved each other, Ellie," he managed to gasp between kisses. And that was how I found myself lying on my back on the kitchen counter, crying out my love for him into the night until I was hoarse and exhausted.


	11. Nerves

**EPOV**

The entire house lit up as a brilliant streak of lightning flashed across the sky. I shivered, wrapping my arms around my chest as I climbed the stairs, darting over to the windows near the loft-office space we'd set up on the second floor and yanking the curtains closed. I wasn't usually bothered by bad weather, but the storm clouds had given the entire house a dark and sickly green hue, and every crack of thunder shook the floorboards beneath my feet.

I leaned over the desk to pull closed another set of curtains before flipping open my laptop. I flopped down in the chair, hugging my knees to my chest while I waited for the machine to boot up. Another loud crash of thunder rocked the house, and I tried to ignore the raging storm, focusing intently on my email instead. I laughed to myself when a new message from my sister appeared.

In a moment of either genius or insanity, I had texted Alice a week before asking for wardrobe advice. I had specifically asked her not to go totally overboard, but at least help me look like someone who knew how to put together a respectable outfit. Alice had called me back almost immediately, squealing in my ear with excitement that I had actually come to her for serious fashion advice.

Since then, I had received multiple emails full of ideas from my exuberant sister. I knew she was trying hard not to overwhelm me with choices, and so far I'd bought nearly everything she'd proposed. Her constant barrage of ideas was a welcome distraction from my nerves as we got closer to the start of term.

Another sickening _boom_ rolled through the surrounding mountains, nearly startling me out of my chair. I could feel the vibrations through the windows just before a torrent of hail started pouring from the angry sky.

I sucked in a deep breath and tried to laugh off my nerves, opening Alice's email.

_Okay, I know you don't like to go all super-exclusive designer, so I am trying to behave and respect that. I HOPE YOU KNOW IT'S KILLING ME THOUGH._

I laughed loudly, almost forgetting the storm outside as I pictured Alice bouncing up and down with equal parts irritation and excitement as she typed. I clicked the first link after reading her instructions to purchase this outfit in its entirety – a seersucker blazer over a gray v-neck tee and olive-colored skinny pants finished off with a pair of silver pumps. I bookmarked the page and read on.

_I also know you like understated, so I think a few outfits along these lines would be perfect…_

I clicked through a series of options ranging from a long, beige, v-neck cashmere sweater paired with dark, wide-leg jeans and heels, to gray, tweed skinny pants and a simple long-sleeved white tee. I had to admit, my sister had done an excellent job of balancing what _she_ wanted me to wear versus what I would actually wear. And of course, she took it upon herself to make a few suggestions regarding items that were most decidedly not work or class appropriate, and I made sure to add a few of those items to my "buy" list as well.

_P.S. – I knew you would like those too_, she added after she had signed off her message. I giggled and set about filling my carts on the various web pages she had directed me to, quickly plugging in my credit card information. I had never been as interested in clothes as Alice would have liked, but I was definitely excited to see how the outfits actually looked.

After purchasing pretty much all of Alice's suggestions, a notice caught my eye from the University of Colorado, instructing me to access the syllabi and required materials for my courses. I scrolled through line after line of required texts – some I had read previously, some I'd never heard of - trying to ignore the swell of panic in my chest. I had voiced my insecurities several times over the last few weeks, but Christopher had assured me again and again that there was no reason for me to worry.

"You'll be fine," he'd said whenever I started to get anxious. But as I huddled at the desk, still cringing from each clap of thunder that rang out overhead, watching through the corner of my eye as the pile of pages in the printer tray continued to grow, I really wasn't so sure.

* * *

**ChPOV**

"Ellie?" I shrugged out of my jacket and hung it up in the closet off the foyer before kicking off my sodden shoes.

"Up here!"

I traced the sound of her voice to the little office space we'd set up, climbing the stairs two at a time. I found her sitting cross-legged in the desk chair, highlighter in hand as she frantically flipped through a large stack of paper, swearing under breath. She hunched over her work, not looking up when I leaned over her chair. Undeterred, I brushed my lips against her skin, leaving a trail of light kisses along her neck. My greeting earned a delicate shiver but no other reaction.

"Ellie," I murmured, working my way along her jawbone toward the front of her face.

"Mmm?" Her eyes remained fixed on the page as she marked off several dates in fluorescent yellow.

I chuckled, pulling back and siting back against the desk. "You're awfully absorbed." At this, her eyes finally flicked up to my face and her lips curved into a sheepish smile.

"Sorry."

"It's okay," I laughed, shaking my head. "But I'm dying to know what it is that has so thoroughly captured your attention."

She grabbed a pencil that she'd buried within the messy knot atop her head, scribbling furiously in the margin and then reaching forward for a notebook, which was open to a page already covered in her hurried scrawl. "Er, I got all of my materials lists and syllabi for my classes." She held up the stack of pages for a second before she started scribbling again. "I kind of freaked out reading it all."

I peered over her shoulder, reading the titles required for her seminar in British literature after 1800. I knew she had already several of them. "How come? You've read at least half of this stuff already."

She put the pencil down on her notebook with a smack, tilting her head toward me. "I've read some of it yeah, but mostly just for fun. Not in a critical, academic way." She waved her hand impatiently as if I should have naturally understood this.

I wasn't sure how to reassure her in a way that didn't come off as pedantic or dismissive, so I leaned forward to kiss her forehead and playfully tugged the disheveled bun on her head. "Really, Ellie. It's not that bad. It's not that much worse than the amount of stuff I make my theory students read. And you don't need to read it all right now, just keep up with the syllabi. It's nothing to get worked into a frenzy over."

Her eyes narrowed as she looked up again. "Well thank you, Professor," she snapped. "I'm not in a _frenzy_, I'm just a little nervous about it all."

_Smooth, Dawling_, I chided myself and raised my hands up, palms out toward her. "I'm sorry, love. Maybe frenzy wasn't the right word." I waited for a moment until the creases around her eyes had relaxed a bit. When I could see that tension in her muscles that caused her shoulders to pull together eased, I brushed a stray strand of hair back over her ear.

She leaned into my hand for a moment, uncrossing her legs and plopping her notes on the desk. Her eyes scanned the room for a moment as she sought a change of subject before she nodded toward the folder I'd brought upstairs with me. "Everything go okay at the dealer?"

We had decided that because our schedules would differ greatly starting in the fall, we really ought to buy a second car. I wanted something with more room then Ellie's coupe, but had gotten used to the way the Audi handled. I settled on an SQ5, and had gone down to the dealership earlier to put down a sizable deposit and work out the details on the model I'd selected. "It did. Delivery should be sometime next week. They will call me with the specific day by Friday."

"Good. Then you can stop stealing my car." She winked.

I tugged on her ponytail again and reached for her hands to urge her up from the desk chair. She stood and let me pull her between my legs as I sat back against the desk. She grinned up at me, her fingers combing through my soaked hair.

"You look like you could use a hot shower."

"Oh?"

"Mmhm," she winked. "Wouldn't want you to catch cold in those wet clothes."

I laughed. "No, we wouldn't want that." I held her chin gently in my hand, lightly rubbing my thumbs along her lower lip, which stuck out in a slight pout in response to my touch. I smiled, remembering something I had wanted to ask her. "So, I realize that this might not be a great time for this," I said carefully, thinking back to her anxious state moments before. "But how would you feel about meeting some new people tonight?"

She drew in a long breath, looking at me inquisitively as she continued to stroked my hair.

I smiled and placed a kiss against her mouth. "I got a call from Stephen Bishops inviting us to his house tonight. I would have told you sooner but he called when I was on my way home."

She sucked lip in, worrying the soft skin with her teeth. "Who will be there?"

"Well, Stephen and his partner. I believe his name is Michael. I'm not sure who else specifically, but he did mention that a few of the other professors and their spouses or significant others had been invited as well."

"Okay." She nodded slowly. "What time do we have to be there?"

After our shower, I went to find my phone to text Stephen and let him know that we would definitely be joining them for dinner tonight. When I got back to our room, I found Ellie dressed only in her underwear - if you could call the tiny bits of lace that hardly covered anything underwear - tearing through the closet and swearing under her breath. I did my best to stay out of her way, laughing quietly to myself as she slammed the door of the bathroom behind her.

I sat down on the bed to put on my shoes, glancing quickly at my watch. "It's nearly seven-thirty, love," I called toward the bathroom. "We need to leave soon." As it was we were going to be at least a few minutes late.

She hadn't yet emerged, nor responded to my prompting, so I decided to risk my own life and knock on the door. I rolled my sleeves up to my elbow as I stood and walked quietly to the door, tapping softly against the wood frame. "Darling, are you almost ready?" The door flew open and I stepped back, expecting to be scolded for rushing her, but her breath caught and her glossed lips pulled up into wide smile.

"I would have been ready a whole lot sooner if I'd realized that's what you were wearing, Professor."

I looked down at my clothes - a black cardigan over a red-and-black-plaid oxford with the sleeves pushed up to my elbows, and dark, tailored jeans - and back up at her. "What? You don't like it?"

She laughed and shook her head. "You are adorable. I love it, just..." She came over and tugged open the last-two buttons of the sweater. "There. Perfect." She kissed my cheek. "You look like you're going to hang out with a bunch of college professors."

My lips twisted up into a half-smile and I arched my brow playfully. "I'm not sure whether that's really a compliment, love."

She winked and bent to put on her shoes. "Oh it is. You do 'hot teacher,' exceptionally well, Dr. Dawling." I grabbed her hands and pulled her in for a heated kiss. She laughed when I pulled away, quickly wiping my gloss-smeared lips with her thumb.

"You know that stuff is never going to stay on for more than a few minutes, Eleanor," I whispered in her ear, thrilling when she shivered against me. She laughed and picked up a small gold clutch. When she turned to face me again, I hissed, noticing what she was wearing for the first time - a delicate, cream-colored cream top with vintage lace accents that allowed her skin to peek through below her shoulders, and purposefully distressed jeans that she'd rolled above her ankles. She was taller than usual, having opted for a light blue pair of sling-back stilettos.

She winked and turned in a circle. "What? You don't like it?"

I shook my head and gestured toward the door. "You better get your little ass in the car or we're not going anywhere."


	12. Intro To The Real World

**ChPOV**

Ellie stared out the passenger window as we wound our way down through the mountains and into town. Dr. Bishop and his partner lived in a charming remodeled Victorian about three miles from campus. I parked across the narrow street from the house, cutting the engine and smoothing the pad of my index finger along the side of her face.

She shifted in her seat, looking back at me. I could see the tightness of the corners of her eyes as her gaze traveled past me and toward the house.

"Is that it?"

I nodded, tilting my head a bit, still tracing the shape of her face. I brushed my thumb along her temple.

"Is it a bit noisy up here, love?"

She inhaled through her nose, holding the air in for several beats before letting it back out through her mouth. "A bit," she murmured. She closed her eyes and breathed in and out a few more times, each breath as deliberate and measured as the first, before she nodded smiled at me. "Sorry. It's just been a while..."

I leaned over to kiss her forehead. "Don't apologize, Ellie. You just let me know if it's too much."

She kept her forehead against mine for a moment before pulling back and wrinkling her nose. "We've been spotted. We better get in there."

I grabbed her hand when she got out of the car and we jogged across the street, occasionally getting pelted with fat raindrops that were all that remained of the afternoon's storm. The front door swung open and a tall, broad-shouldered man in his early fifties waited to greet us. He ran a hand through his closely cropped gray hair and stepped back to open the door fully.

"Christopher!" Stephen boomed. "Come in, come in. Glad you could make it." He waved us in off the porch and shook my hand quickly. "And here I thought that picture on your desk must have come with the frame." He winked and reached for Ellie's hand.

I laughed, watching the flame beneath her skin spread across her cheeks. "Stephen, this is my wife, Ellie Dawling. Ellie this is Stephen Bishops." I gestured toward our host and she smiled and shook his hand.

"Ellie, my dear, it is a pleasure. You are even lovelier in person."

"Th-thanks," she stammered, still blushing madly. "It's a pleasure to meet you as well."

He smiled and clapped me on the shoulder. "All right, enough lurking in the entryway. Come join the party."

He led us into the living room where several other people had gathered, clustered together by the large windows or seated on the sofa. Several of the faces were familiar, and I assumed most of those that I didn't know were significant others.

Stephen led us around the room quickly, making introductions; Ellie's grip got on my hand got progressively tighter with each new face. Before we could complete the circuit, another man, younger with blonde curly hair and a slender build, appeared from the kitchen, glasses of red wine in hand. He delivered the drinks to two awaiting guests and came to stand beside Stephen. "Christopher, Ellie, this is my partner, Michael."

We shook hands and he offered to get us something to drink. "Cocktail? Wine? White? Red?" Not wanting to look out of place I agreed to a glass of red wine and Ellie asked for the same. Michael glanced over his shoulder as a woman seated in the corner stood and began to make her way over to us.

"Incoming," he muttered. "I will be right back with those drinks." With that he disappeared back into the kitchen.

Before I could lead Ellie to introduce her to the few guests we hadn't yet said hello to, the redheaded woman whom I hadn't met before came to stand in front of us. "Dr. Dawling, right?"

I shook her hand. "Christopher."

"Patricia Marzen," she said as her piercing gaze settled on Ellie.

I nodded in recognition. "Oh your Robert's wife? Is he here?" I glanced around the room.

"He should be shortly. He knew he would be late so we came separately." She shrugged and looked at Ellie again before her eyes focused back on me. "I presume this is your wife?" She didn't wait for my confirmation before grabbing one of Ellie's hands between both of her own.

"Ellie, right?" she said, and Ellie's eyes widened. "I hear that you will be working under Dr. Phillips this semester."

Ellie swallowed, looking a little thrown, but smiled graciously. "Yes, I am."

"He was my mentor in graduate school, and I'm very lucky to still count him as a close friend." She leaned in closer, looking like a cross between a panther seeking its prey and a sage imparting a great wisdom.

"He is an _excellent_ mentor, _if_ you are a serious student."

Ellie yanked her hand back. "Why wouldn't I be a serious student?"

_Easy, Ellie_, I thought, squeezing her shoulder. She shot a sharp glare at me before turning back to Patricia expectantly. The woman shrugged and smiled serenely.

"Anyway, it was nice to meet you."

Just then, Michael swept back in and handed us our glasses. He looked pointedly at Ellie who was staring after Patricia as she walked away. "Ellie, don't mind her."

Her eyes flitted upward. "I'm sorry?"

"I said don't mind her," he repeated in a low voice. He rolled his eyes toward the redhead's back, clearly in on whatever her game was. Ellie nodded absently, taking long sip of her wine. "Why don't you join us in the other room." Michael gestured toward the kitchen, adding in a stage whisper, "Friends, not foes."

* * *

**EPOV**

I felt a little bad as I walked away from Christopher; I knew he'd been looking forward to us being a couple in front of his colleagues after so many months of sneaking around at Cornell. But he was in his element in the other room and was quickly wrapped into a conversation with several of the other guests. I needed some air after the brief but strange encounter with Patricia, and short of going outside into the rain, following Michael seemed to be the best option. I swallowed another large sip of wine as I tried to drown out the thoughts coming from the other room.

"Here," Michael said, nodding to two other women who were standing beside one of the large picture windows in the kitchen. My eyes followed his gaze toward them, and I heard the faint cling of the wine bottle against my glass as he poured a bit more all around. "Susanna, Elena, come meet Ellie."

The first woman, Susanna, a curvy woman slightly taller than me with white blond hair, greeted me with two quick kisses to my cheeks and spoke with a subtle hint of an Eastern European accent. "Dr. Dawling's wife, correct?"

I nodded, trying not to be annoyed. I'd heard myself referred to this was so many times that night I was starting to feel more like an accessory than a person. But I knew she didn't mean any harm.

"Ellie, I'm Elena," the second woman said, pulling me into a quick, one-armed hug.

"Nice to meet you both," I murmured, still feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Elena laughed lightly. "It's a lot of work being the new face, I know. John and I got married a year ago and when he started bringing me to these gatherings and events it was exhausting. You'll get used to it."

I laughed with her, watching the wine swirl in my glass as I twirled the stem in my fingers. I looked up at Elena, tilting my head to the side. "So you aren't faculty?"

She shook her head. "Oh good gracious no. I can't sing or play to save my life. John teaches theory.

"That's Christopher's subject, right?" asked Susanna.

"It is," I said, glancing back to her. "And you?"

"We work in different departments," she said. "I teach composition."

"Where's Thomas?" Michael asked Susanna before looking back at me. "Her husband is an English professor at UC Denver." His eyes darted back to Susanna. "Ellie here is getting her masters in Lit."

I laughed nervously. "Well, trying to."

Susanna beamed. "Thomas would love to meet you, I'm sure. He couldn't make it tonight, unfortunately, but maybe next time."

"What does he teach?" I asked.

"Lately, seminars in creative writing; but his real passion is classic literature."

"Do you write at all, Ellie?" Michael asked as he opened the refrigerator and pulled out a plate of cheeses and set it on the counter.

"You mean, stories and poetry and such?" I shook my head. "No, no. I am afraid creative writing is not my strong suit." I chewed my lip, taking another swig of wine before summoning the courage to change the subject.

"So, can I ask you something? What is her deal?" I spoke in a low voice and jerked my head back toward the living room just as a roar of laughter erupted following something Christopher had said.

My three companions exchanged hesitant glances. "Well," Michael said carefully, "she has a tendency to stir shit up."

Elena leaned in closer. "From what John told me," she whispered, "she and Phillips are, um, _close_." My eyebrows shot up toward my hairline as I picked up the innuendo from her tone and her thoughts. She glanced up to Susanna and Michael who nodded; this was apparently a poorly kept secret.

"They met when she was a grad student, and well, let's just say they've had a unique bond over the years." She took long drink of her wine, watching me over the rim of her glass as I processed what she was saying.

"And this is all totally common knowledge?"

"Mmhm," Michael affirmed, plucking a piece of cheese of the tray and popping it into his mouth.

"What about her husband?"

They all shrugged. "John thinks he must have _some_ idea. Rumors have been all over the English department here _and_ in Denver for years."

Susanna nodded. "It's true. She and Thomas work for the same department. The stories he could tell you."

"Are we telling stories, now, Susanna?" Patricia appeared in the doorway to the kitchen, letting her question linger like an unanswered challenge as she helped herself to a fresh gin and tonic. Clearly her husband had arrived because she grabbed a clean glass and made another as well. "Stephen is looking for you, Michael," she said as she sauntered out.

Michael rolled his eyes and followed her out to see what Stephen wanted. I leaned back against the counter, fielding questions from Susanna and Elena about Christopher and me. I chatted comfortably with them – surprised to find myself enjoying the opportunity to practice the background stories that Chris and I had rehearsed about how we met, where I was from, and what I'd studied as an undergrad. I didn't realize that I'd stopped keeping track of Christopher in the other room until he appeared in the doorway of the kitchen.

"Christopher!" Elena called, waving him in. "Where have you been hiding?"

"I could ask you all the same thing." He flashed a friendly smile, walking over and slipping his arm around my waist. "John and I realized that our wives had gone missing, I thought I would investigate."

I could feel the tension in his muscles as his fingers closed over my hip. His thoughts were reserved. I twisted a bit to run my finger over one of the buttons on his shirt, biting my lip as I chanced a look at his face. "Everything okay out there?"

"I just wondered if you were ever planning on coming back."

"Oh, yeah, Chris. I'm sorry," I murmured, trying to ignore the way Elena and Susanna were suddenly very busy looking out the window again. He nodded and took my hand. I glanced over my shoulder, shrugging a little as they waved.

My anxiety started to creep its way back into my mind as Christopher led me back to the living room. He held my hand tightly as I sat beside him for the rest of the evening, but the gesture felt more like a claim than a comfort.

The ride home was uncomfortable. Christopher was angry with me I knew, but his thoughts weren't revealing any clues as to exactly what his problem was. I kept my hands folded tightly in my lap, trying to keep my own temper in check. When we pulled into the garage at home, my patience for the silent treatment had disappeared.

"So are you going tell me what you're so mad about?" I stared straight out the windshield, making no move to get out of the car. He turned to stare at me in disbelief.

"You're kidding right?"

"No," I said, trying to keep my voice steady, "I'm not, actually." I heard his teeth snap together and he yanked the keys from the ignition and climbed out of the car, slamming the door. "What the fuck, Christopher!" I shouted after him as I followed him into the house. "Is this because I hung out in the kitchen for a while? You could have asked me to stay with you, you know. I fucking would have."

He growled and rubbed his forehead. "I know that. I just didn't think you would fucking disappear for two hours."

"Well why didn't you come say something sooner?"

"Why didn't you hear that I wanted you to come back?

I shrugged. "I don't know. I was trying to pay attention to my own conversation – I could hear you all laughing and carrying on; you seemed to be doing just fine."

He leaned back against the counter, arms crossed against his chest and eyes cast down toward the floor. "I kind of thought this was going to be our night to…I don't know, go public for real. Together. And then you vanished; off gossiping in the kitchen like school children."

I stared at him open-mouthed, waiting for him to look up but he stubbornly refused. "So, you're mad because you couldn't show me off like a new god-damned toy?" He flinched, and I got angrier. "I _did_ meet everyone, Christopher. Do you know how many times I was referred to as 'Christopher's wife?' As if I'm not really my own person but an accessory to _you_?!" The indignation that I'd tried so hard to swallow roared from within. "I am my own person goddamn it!"

At this, he looked up, his eyes narrowed, and I took a step backward when his coal-black irises seared through mine. "I'm sorry," he spat, "I didn't realize being my _wife_ was so offensive to you. I thought it's what you wanted."

I instantly regretted my tirade. "Chris, that's not what I meant," I whispered, moving toward him a few steps at a time until I was close enough to touch him. He shrugged me off when I reached for his arm. "Christopher, I'm sorry."

He held up his hand, looking away from me. "I need to go hunt. I will be back before dawn."

I held it together until he was out the door. I slumped into one of the kitchen chairs, dropping my head in my hands and starting to cry. A few minutes later, my phone buzzed in my pocket and I answered it without even looking at the screen.


	13. Apologize

**EPOV**

"Alice," I sobbed, scrubbing tears from my cheeks.

"Oh, honey. What on earth is going on over there?"

"I think I made a mess," I sniffed.

I could almost here her shaking her head and wagging her finger at me. "No, you did not Eleanor. I saw bits from tonight; it looked like you had a good time, even after meeting that horrid woman."

More sobs erupted from me. "He's _so_ angry with me. I said something really terrible."

"Shh. I saw that part. You didn't mean it the way he took it, and he will see that when he calms down." I heard her shift the phone. "Rose," she called into the background. "Need you for this, please." She murmured something else before returning her attention to me. "Okay. Go get your laptop and make yourself some popcorn or something. We're going to find a movie that we can all pay-per-view and watch together."

"Why do I need my laptop?" I asked thickly.

She laughed. "Because we're going to skype while we watch it, silly. Just because we're not _there_ doesn't mean we can be there with you, little sis."

A few minutes later I flopped down on the bed, waiting for my laptop to load and for skype to connect. I found the movie that she had texted me, and their faces appeared on my laptop screen as opening credits started to roll. None of us really watched the movie, instead, my sisters listened to me bawl, struggling to get the words out between hiccuped sobs to tell them about everything that had happened.

"Fuck him," Rosalie spat. "What kind of controlling bull shit is that, anyway? You're not allowed to go talk to people?" Through my tears I could see her nostrils flaring as she fumed.

I sniffed and pulled another tissue from the box I'd grabbed form the bathroom. "I don't think it's like that."

"Then what's it like?"

I looked at her through the computer screen. "I don't know, Rose. I know there's something bothering him but I couldn't tell what it was, and then I snapped and," I hiccupped again, "made everything so much worse."

Rose shook her head, but surprisingly she held her tongue. She looked at Alice, who was sitting next to her as they huddled around the computer together on Rosalie's bed. "Alice," she said, "can you see what happens next?"

Alice closed her eyes and sucked in a slow, deep breath. "He does come back before dawn," she murmured. "But the rest of it is fuzzy."

I chewed on my lip, which was raw and sore from my constant worrying. "What does that mean?"

Alice smiled softly. "Probably just that he's still too busy being a stupid, indignant man, and he hasn't figured out quite how much groveling he will need to do."

I dropped my head in my hands, letting my hair fall down around me. "I don't think he's the one that has to grovel," I mumbled. My hands dropped to my stomach and I pulled my knees up leaned over until I could rest my forehead against them. I felt sick every time I thought of the way he heard my words.

"I'm so horrible," I moaned. "I knew how he would take it when I was saying it, but I was so pissed off I didn't even care." I blew my nose. "Ugh. Please tell me the fucking family isn't sitting around listening to this."

"No," Rose assured me. "You're in luck, it's just us here tonight. At least for the moment."

After a few minutes more I bade my sisters good night and shoved my computer aside, curling up in the big empty bed and trying unsuccessfully to sleep for a few hours. By the time I finally gave up, the onyx skyline had given way to sparkling indigo as the thick cloud cover of the night finally began to break, leaving behind the first signs that dawn was only a few hours away.

I shoved the covers back with a frustrated growl. I caught my reflection in the mirror and realized I hadn't changed since I'd been home. I stripped everything off and ran for the shower, breaking down again as the hot water ran over me.

* * *

**ChPOV**

I'd only made it about a mile from our house before I was no longer able to convince myself that I had any right to my anger. I knew I should go back to her on my knees, begging her to understand that I'm just a stupid man, and completely unworthy of the love and affection that she'd bestowed on me. Still, I could not force myself to go home and face her, and instead sat down on a mountain cliff, trapped by fear and guilt.

When I finally grew tired of feeling like a coward, I jumped up, running as fast as I could as soon as my feet hit the ground. I crept in the backdoor a few minutes later, careful to be as quiet as I could in case Ellie was sleeping. The house was still mostly dark, not that the lack of light mattered to my vision. When I reached the second floor, I could see Ellie's shadowed form.

She'd fallen asleep in the desk chair – her cheek resting against her knees, which were clutched tightly to her chest. She wore one of my t-shirts and had pulled it over her legs. I could see the pink, swollen skin beneath her eyes and an empty box of tissues that lay discarded on the floor next to a small overflowing trashcan. Her hair was damp and had been pulled into a tight, thick braid. I leaned over the desk, intending to shut down her computer but brushing against one of the keys, bringing the screen back to life.

I glanced at the new document that she'd apparently been working on – a draft syllabus for the writing class she would be teaching. A printout on the right caught my eye, and I saw that this was among the first assignments for a workshop for new TAs. I read the page further, surprised to see that the first meeting for the workshop was next week. Ellie hadn't mentioned anything about it to me. _Or maybe, you moron, you haven't been paying enough attention._

I saved her document and closed it so it would be there later when she wanted to return to it. I went to shut down her Internet browser as well, finding a confirmation page for a purchase of at least twenty books – all of which I assumed were for her other classes. I sighed when I thought back to how she'd been the previous afternoon – frantically pouring over lists and titles and dates, wide-eyed and panicking that it was all too much for her.

I picked her up and carried her back to our bedroom, carefully tucking her under the covers. She stirred but did not wake, rolling over toward the edge of the bed and once again hugging her knees. I wanted to lie down beside her but I was afraid to do so before we had a chance to talk. I had no idea what she was thinking or feeling and didn't want to invade her space. With a reluctant sigh, I kissed her forehead and went back downstairs, staring unseeingly out into the expanse of terrain that surrounded us until the sun was high in the sky.

* * *

**EPOV**

I woke with a start, surprised to find myself in bed. My head throbbed and my eyes stung, and I yanked the covers up over my face as I rolled over. I knew Christopher was downstairs – I could hear his measured breathing, and the aching regret in his thoughts.

"Christopher," I murmured into the pillow. I had my back to the doorway, but I knew he was standing there only a second later.

"Hi," he said quietly.

I rolled over and peeked out from behind the covers. "Hi."

"May I come in?"

I pulled the covers down a bit more. "Um, yeah. It's your room, too."

He shrugged as he walked in and sat down beside me on the bed. He kept his back to me, and his shoulders hunched inward as he leaned over and rested his elbows on his knees. "Not without you it isn't."

At this I sat up, still keeping the blankets drawn around my shoulders. "What?" I swore I had to have heard him wrong. "Baby, I am not going anywhere."

He made a strange wheezing noise and his shoulders hitched; it sounded like he was choking on his incoming breath. "I know," he gasped. "I know that." He rubbed his forehead with his hands a few times before sucking in a solid breath and facing me for the first time. "Listen, why don't you come downstairs and we will talk."

I nodded and he disappeared, leaving me alone again in the room. My hands shook as I untangled myself from the sheets. When I got downstairs, he was seated at the kitchen table, a cup of coffee sitting in front of the chair across from him. I chewed my lip as I sat down.

I watched as he twirled his wedding ring around his finger. He hadn't changed from the previous night, but he'd taken off his sweater and left his shirt unbuttoned; his white t-shirt visible underneath. When I heard him decide to speak, I forced myself to look up from his chest to his face.

"I didn't know you had a writing workshop starting next week."

I took a long sip of coffee as he spoke, my brows pulling together in confusion over the cup. "What?"

"When I got home you were sleeping at the desk. I saw what you'd been working on, and the schedule for the writing workshop. Your papers said it starts next week?"

My head cocked to the side – this was not how I expected this talk to begin. "Um, yeah." I set the mug down and pulled my legs up so I was sitting cross-legged on the chair, folding my hands in my lap.

"I didn't mean to pry – I saved it for you…"

I snorted, looking down at my lap. "It was shit, you could have just deleted it."

"It wasn't. It was a draft right? It looked like a pretty decent start." He smiled when I finally met his gaze. "But why didn't you tell me about it?"

I tugged on my braid, pulling it over my shoulder and studying the end. "The draft?"

He shook his head. "_Ellie_. No, the class."

I shrugged. "You didn't ask."

"What?"

"You didn't ask. You haven't really asked me about any of the classes I'm going to take." I sucked in a breath and began talking faster. "I mean, of course we've talked to death about what we will tell people about how we met and where you've worked and where I did undergrad and all the things that we need to deal with to be believable to _other_ people. But you haven't asked me about what I'm _really_ going to be doing. You knew I picked all my classes three weeks ago. Hell you saw me earlier today," I paused, scrunching up my face, "I mean yesterday. When I've told you how fucking nervous I am about it all you just pat me on the head and tell me I will be '_fine._'"

I could feel more angry tears stinging in my eyes, and I tried to blink them away as I chanced a look up at him. He sat back in his chair with his palms still resting on the table. The tendons in his arms were taut and his mouth was open in shock.

"Ellie," he finally said after taking several slow deep breaths, trying to control his own temper, which simmered just beneath the surface. "I never meant for you to feel like I didn't care or that what you're going to be doing doesn't matter. I never meant to brush you off."

"Don't work yourself up into a frenzy, Ellie," I spat, mimicking his earlier words to me. "Remember that? How the hell was I supposed to take that?"

"Damn it, Ellie." He smacked the table with an open hand and I flinched. "Why the hell didn't you just _say_ something? I'm not the damn mind reader, here."

"I don't know," I whispered. "I guess I didn't know how much it had bothered me before today…" I looked back down at my lap and saw wet drops on his shirt from new tears that started to fall from my eyes. I sniffed and wiped them away. "And then last night, I started to feel like you were leading around a prized cattle for auction or something." He hissed and I shrank back against the chair.

"Is that why you disappeared for so long?"

"I didn't realize it was that long. I didn't realize I had a curfew." He hissed again, but this time his irritation raised my hackles further. "No really, Chris. I am sorry if you felt abandoned, but am I really not allowed to make my own friends?"

He threw his arms out in frustration. "You don't even know those people!"

"No, but they were _nice_ to me! They made me feel better about that wretched Patricia woman and sympathized with being the new person among the group. We had fun. I didn't feel like I was just putting on a show."

We glared at each other for several moments. It surprised me how transparent his thoughts were right then, but I realized he was trying so hard not to say something out of anger that he didn't have the energy to control what was in his head too. Finally, he sucked in a long breath and exhaled through his nose, dropping his head into his hands.

"Christopher," I said, reaching out across the table not quite able to reach far enough to touch him. "I'm sorry about what I said to you, and the way I said it." No matter what other misunderstandings remained, I never wanted him to think that I didn't want to be his wife.

He swallowed roughly and nodded against his hands. "I knew you didn't mean it that way, love," he mumbled, his voice breaking as he spoke. I couldn't stand the separation anymore so I walked around the table and sat down next to him. He turned to me automatically and pulled me into his lap, shaking as he held me.

"Chris," I sobbed. "I am so sorry. I never want to hurt you like that again." I wept against him, each tear a plea for his forgiveness. He rocked me through his own tearless crying, brushing my hair and my tears from my face.

"Oh, Ellie," he murmured when my breathing started to settle a bit. "Please don't cry, love. I'm sorry. I was a complete ass." I felt his fingers slide under my chin and lifted my head in response.

"Really," he said. "I don't think you're a trophy, or…what did you say before? An _accessory_. That's it. I don't think of you that way and you damn well know it. But I'm sorry for what I said before…really. And I'm sorry if you feel like I've dismissed your fears…but I _do_ think you'll be fine. You're smart – you are more than capable of handling all of this. And you're funny, and charming, and fucking gorgeous and people are going to want to know you. _You_. Not my wife, but _you_."

He bent his head to kiss me, sealing between us the forgiveness that we sought and the bond that would never be broken.


	14. Frozen

**A/N: Possible Trigger Warning for sexual assault / attempted sexual assault...**

**ChPOV**

I glanced at my watch as I sprinted across the quad. My class had run a few minutes over, and I was going to be late to meet Ellie. Since the semester began three weeks ago, I'd made it a point to meet her whenever I could after her Tuesday/Thursday freshman writing class, when we both had a few minutes to spare. There was usually only enough time for a quick walk to the library where she usually went to prepare for her next class before I had to get back for office hours, but it was an extra few minutes in the day with her and I hated to miss even that.

When I reached her classroom, the last of her students filed out, a couple giving a friendly nod in my direction. She'd told me that the first few times I'd been spotted lurking around the classroom, rumors started flying around that she was brazenly carrying on with a married professor.

To put a stop to the chattering, she dragged me into the room one day when I'd arrived early, announcing that the rumors were true. The whole room froze, myself included as I waited to see how far she planned to take her little gag. She looked around the room and burst out laughing.

"This is my husband, Dr. Christopher Dawling. He teaches for the College of Music." She raised an eyebrow toward a few sheepish grins and shook her head. "Sorry to disappoint you all but there's nothing scandalous to report here. Class dismissed."

I chuckled to myself at the memory and knocked on the frame of the door, smiling as she pushed her hair back and looked up from the stacks of paper on the desk.

"Hey," she said, turning her attention back to the pages, checking to make sure they were all accounted for before sticking them in her bag. She paused for a second when I walked up to stand next to her her, leaning over to kiss her cheek.

"Hey. Are you headed to the library today?"

She turned her face toward me and gave me a quick kiss on my lips. "Actually, no. I have a meeting with Dr. Phillips in a few minutes, so I need to get upstairs." She turned around and snuck her hands under my jacket, slipping her thumbs just inside the waist of my trousers.

I cupped her cheek and kissed her softly; I knew she was listening to make sure no one was around to notice us. "Mm, I will miss our walk." She sighed and rested her head against my chest. "Everything okay?"

She nodded against me, hugging me tighter for a moment. "Yeah. I'm just tired."

I stroked my hand over her hair. "You've been working really hard, love." It seemed she hardly slept anymore, between studying, grading her students' assignments, and hanging out with me even when I got home late from my evening classes. I pressed my fingers under her chin and tilted her face up toward me, dropping a quick kiss on her nose. "You need to sleep more."

She scowled. "Then I'd never get to spend time with you."

"Nonsense. I don't want you collapsing from exhaustion or something." She rolled her eyes and pulled away from me.

"I need to get upstairs." She turned to grab her bag but I picked it up first.

"Come on," I said, slinging it over my shoulder and taking her hand. "Can I at least walk you there?"

She smiled. "Of course." When we got to Dr. Phillips' office, I handed her bag to her and tugged her back against me for a quick hug. She stretched up to reach me, lightly brushing her lips against mine. "See you tonight."

A couple of hours later, I was sitting in my office, making notes for my lecture later that evening. I heard footsteps and looked up just as Stephen Bishops knocked on the doorframe.

"Hey Chris, are we still on for later?"

I looked up blankly.

"We're planning the department meeting next week? Remember, co-chair?" Shortly before the start of the semester, the Theory Department Chair was promoted to Associate Dean, leaving the chair position vacant. Stephen had suggested me as interim chair until a new faculty member could be more formally selected, but since I was new it was decided that we would split the duties of acting department head. Next week we would be leading our first department-wide meeting.

"Oh right," I said, rubbing my eyes. "Sorry, Stephen. Yes, that's fine. My class let's out at 7:30, so I will meet you in the garage?"

When Stephen walked away I pulled out my phone to text Ellie. _Hey, I totally forgot but Stephen's coming over tonight for dinner, so we can plan next week's dept meeting. We are going to pick up food on the way back to the house. I will get some for you, too._

* * *

**EPOV**

Dr. Phillips was seated at his desk, typing furiously at his computer, scowling at the screen. I waited until he waved me in and quietly took a seat across from him. He didn't look away from his computer as we sat in silence; I assumed he was waiting for his other TA, Ben, to join three of us were supposed to meet weekly, but since the start of the semester we'd only actually met once.

As he pounded the keys, his thoughts matched his angered expression. Though I tried to tune them out, I got a detailed recount of an argument he'd had earlier that morning with Patricia. Their peculiar relationship really was the worst kept secret on campus, except for maybe Phillips' penchant for picking up an assortment of young co-eds each term.

When Ben still didn't arrive after several more minutes, I cleared my throat. "I'm sorry, Dr. Phillips?"

He punched one last key on his laptop before folding his hands on his desk and looking at me over his glasses. "I'm sorry, Ms. Dawling," he said. "I didn't mean to keep you waiting. Why don't you shut the door and we can get started."

"Is Ben not coming?" I asked as I closed the door. When I turned around, Dr. Phillips had moved from behind the desk and was sitting on the corner, in front of where I'd just been sitting. He watched me as I walked back to the desk and awkwardly picked up my things and sat in the other chair. I pushed it back a bit, suddenly feeling like I needed to add to the space between us. He chuckled and nodded toward the stack of papers in my hand.

"So how are your students handling their first few assignments?" He slid over, leaning toward me slightly.

Even if I couldn't hear it in his thoughts, I could feel his stare as he studied my chest, rather than the work sample I held out to him. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, pulling my cardigan closed when he finally looked away.

"Their work has been pretty good, so far," I answered him, nodding toward the page he held. "I've made pretty much the same comments on almost all of them."

He nodded as he read, and I quickly flipped through my folder to make sure I had everything out I thought we would be discussing, anxious to finish this meeting as quickly as possible. I didn't hear his thought until it was too late, and warm fingers stroked over my cheek, carefully pushing my hair over my shoulder. I jumped in my seat, my notebook and folders falling to the floor.

"Please don't do that," I said firmly. He chuckled again, shaking his head as he slid over again, positioning himself right in front of my chair, making it impossible to stand without climbing over his lap. I grabbed the arms of the chair and was about to shove it backward again when he reached out, grabbing the back of my neck and forcing my face upward with his thumb under my jaw.

"Come on now," he murmured, leaning forward until his forehead almost touched mine. "You still owe me for granting your late admission."

I was shaking. Half of my mind was screaming at me to push past this weak human whose hand was sliding up underneath the knee length skirt I was wearing. My limbs wouldn't obey, and I sat frozen in terror as his grip tightened on my neck. His mouth curved up into a leering smile as he sensed the fear rolling off me and taking it as a sign that I would submit.

Emboldened, he leaned closer, his fingers digging into my thigh. I cringed away from him, trying desperately to find the fight response that had gone dormant in my brain.

My hands were still shaking when I got home. It took three tries to get my key in the lock. When I was finally able to wrench it around far enough, I shoved the door open with my shoulder and burst into the house. I bolted toward the downstairs bathroom, barely making it to the toilet before I was violently ill.

When there was nothing left in my stomach to purge, I forced myself up from the bathroom floor. I grabbed a garbage bag from under the kitchen sink and ran up to our bedroom. I turned the shower on full blast, tearing off the clothes I'd worn that day and shoving it all in the bag.

I turned the water temperature up as hot as it could go, scrubbing furiously against the places he'd touched. Over and over I could see it all in my mind. I could see myself freezing through his eyes. I felt his fingers siding along my thighs as he pictured my mouth around his hardening cock. As if it wasn't bad enough knowing that I just _sat_ for so long, I had all of his lurid thoughts forever trapped in my memory.

When the water ran cold I climbed out of the shower and wrapped a towel around myself. I caught a glimpse of my reflection and shuddered, my eyes were swollen and red from crying. I stared at my shoulder in the mirror as I twisted my hair into a tight braid. The strands pulled uncomfortably against my skin but I didn't care.

I yanked open the bottom drawer of Christopher's dresser, tugging his Cornell sweatshirt out from the bottom of a pile of neatly folded sweaters and pulling it over my head. I put on some yoga pants and trudged back downstairs, picking my bag up from where I left it on the floor. When I finally ran out of Phillips' office earlier, I shoved everything I had dropped into my bag as quickly as I could. I dumped it all out on the coffee table, trying to sort through the graded work.

My phone buzzed from inside my bag but I ignored it. My trembling fingers were making it impossible to neatly organize the mess I'd made so I gave up and curled myself info a ball on the sofa.

* * *

**ChPOV**

"Ellie?" I shut the door from the garage behind me and Stephen set the bags of food on the counter. I could hear her breathing in the other room, so I nodded in that direction. Ellie was curled up on the couch with the throw-blanket over her, red-inked papers strewn over the coffee table. I lightly kissed her forehead and walked back into the kitchen.

"She fell asleep on the sofa," I explained quietly, opening one of the cupboards to grab some plates. "Come on. We can work in the dining room."

Stephen followed me and set the bags of food down on the table. "Too much partying?" he joked.

"Hardly," I laughed. "She's been working like mad. She said she was tired earlier so I'm not surprised." I resisted the urge to cringe as we opened containers and I scooped up a small helping of Ellie's favorite pasta-and-sauce concoction.

"How's it working out with her and Phillips?" he asked, plating his own food. "He's got quite a reputation."

I rolled my eyes. Ellie had filled me on the gossip she'd picked up about the philandering Professor Phillips. "Is he really carrying on with Robert's wife?"

Stephen nodded. "Her, grad students, secretaries." He waved his hand in a circular motion a couple times.

"Jesus." I pushed the food around my plate. "I'm sorry I asked." I reached across the table for my notebook, seeking a change of topic. "Shall we get to work? Margaret mentioned something to me about setting up audition panels for next year, I want to make sure we put that on the agenda..."

An hour or so later, I hear Ellie stirring in the other room. She crept into the dining room, rubbing her eyes. When she pulled her hands away from her face, she jumped a little.

"Hi Stephen," she said, wrapping her arms across her chest. I noticed for the first time the sweatshirt she had on and I raised an eyebrow. She wouldn't meet my gaze as I stood to pull out a chair for her.

"Hey Ellie," Stephen said. "Sorry for invading." She smiled weakly.

"There's food if you're hungry, love." I studied her face as she walked toward me. Her eyes were red and puffy. She paused, her fingers trembling a bit as she touched the back of the chair.

"Actually," she said, chewing her lip, "I think I might just go to bed."

She didn't look at either of us as she backed out of the room, and I stared after her in confusion.


	15. Tell Me, Love

**ChPOV**

"Is she okay?" Stephen asked. I turned around to face him; his brow was furrowed in concern. "Is she sick or something?"

"Or something," I murmured. "Listen, I'm going to run up and check on her, okay?"

Stephen waved me away. "Go. I think we are almost done. I will clean this up and let Michael know he can pick me up soon."

I nodded and turned on my heel, taking the stairs as fast as I dared with a human in the house. The bedroom door was closed. I turned the knob and rapped softly against the wood.

"Darling, can I come in?"

She was huddled in the chair in the corner, her knees held against her chest. The only light in the room was the sliver of moonlight that peeked in through the pulled curtains.

I sat down on the corner of the bed facing her, resting my forearms on my knees. "What's with the sweatshirt, love?" The hood was pulled up over her head. "Why are you hiding?"

She shrugged.

"Ellie, honey, please talk to me." I reached for her hand and she flinched away, just as she'd done after Victoria attacked her. I wondered if maybe something had triggered her memories again.

She shook her head, whispering, "Isn't Stephen still here?"

"Don't worry about Stephen. He thinks you're ill, and frankly he looked almost as concerned about you as I feel right now." I brushed my hand over her head. "Please, sweetheart, tell me what's going on. _Are_ you sick?"

"No."

"Did I do something?"

"No." She sniffed and rubbed her eyes.

I tried to think of what else might be wrong. When I'd left her in front of Dr. Phillips' office, she'd been fine - just tired. As I recalled my last memory of her, I could see her muscles stiffen suddenly. I froze.

"Ellie, did something happen in your meeting?" She didn't respond; she didn't even breathe. I kneeled in front of the chair. After everything I'd heard about Phillips, and looking at Ellie now, cowering beneath the huge sweatshirt like she'd done after Victoria, my imagination started to run wild. I couldn't believe the man would be so stupid, but I knew if nothing else he was less than subtle in his conquests. Suddenly I was convinced that the women he bedded weren't all taken in by his wit or charm.

"Eleanor. Did he hurt you?" I tried to keep the murderous fury I felt bubbling within me at the mere thought of him touching her out of my voice.

Still nothing.

"Ellie." I shook her lightly, at least wanting her to take a breath. "Breathe, baby, please." She let out the air she'd been holding and inhaled again.

"I just sat there." She mumbled the words so quietly that even I almost couldn't hear her.

"I'm sorry?"

"I couldn't move." She turned her head so her cheek rested against her arms instead of her forehead. "I just sat there. I could have flicked my fingers and sent him flying across the desk but I could _not move_."

Her breathing picked up speed, leaving her almost gasping. Her shoulders heaved with the in-and-out of her panicked respirations.

"Ellie, I don't understand," I said, wrapping my arms around her huddled form. "Please tell me what I can do, love. If something has hurt you I need to know." Though I knew it was unlikely that Phillips could do any physical damage to my half-vampire wife, there was no denying that something had happened and he was at fault. I picked her up and cradled her in my lap, rocking her as she cried openly. She didn't speak again; instead she cried herself out and fell asleep in my arms. I laid her down in bed and tucked her carefully under the blankets before running back downstairs.

I had nearly forgotten Stephen altogether when I stormed into back into the dining room to get my laptop. I stopped short, taking a deep breath when I saw him putting his things away. I tried to remember not to frighten him with my building rage. He looked up with a raised eyebrow.

"Everything okay?"

I shook my head once. "I'm going to kill him." I couldn't even care that my words sounded far from an idle threat. Stephen went pale.

"Um, I'm sorry?"

I looked at him, taking another deep breath to calm myself at least a little. I heard movement outside the front door - Michael had arrived. I waited until he knocked and went to let him in. He looked between my face and Stephen's, his friendly grin flattening as he registered the tension in the air.

"What's going on?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose, realizing that Ellie probably wouldn't want the whole world to know but since _I_ didn't really know what happened yet, I couldn't swallow enough of my anger to stay quiet.

"I don't know what happened, but Phillips _did_ something. She won't tell me what."

Michael rubbed the back of his neck. "Did something? To Ellie?"

Stephen's eyes were saucer's as he parsed my words. "Holy shit." He turned to Michael. "She was crashed on the couch when we got here, and when she stuck her head in the dining room she looked really upset. I just thought she might have been sick or something."

I shook my head. "Listen, can you guys keep this quiet? I don't know what happened yet, and I don't know how much she will tell me. I need to figure out what her recourses are."

"I can help you with that," Stephen offered. "I can research what the internal options are at the University, if nothing else. No one would know I was poking around or why."

Michael leaned against the wall with his arms crossed. "If there's anything else you guys need, let me know. I want to help if I can."

I nodded. "Thanks, I appreciate that. Right now I'm going to let her rest and see if she will talk in the morning."

Stephen gathered his things and the men quietly made their way to the door. He turned to me as I held it open. "Listen, that stuff we talked about earlier? There've been other rumors...A couple years back he was brought before a disciplinary panel because a student said he raped her. It was big news here for a few days and then everything went quiet and he was back at work like nothing happened." He glanced reluctantly toward the staircase and then back to me. "I'm not saying I think that's what happened to her, Chris, I just hope she will talk to you."

I swallowed and nodded. "Thanks."

* * *

**EPOV**

My head throbbed when I woke up. My eyelids felt tight and heavy beneath the swollen skin around my eyes. I blinked several times before I could force them to open fully. I could hear Christopher in the house, but he wasn't in the room with me. I wanted to call for him, but stopped before I could breathe his name. My memories from the day before came rushing back, and suddenly I wasn't sure if I could face him in the bright light of day. My eyes flashed to the bedside clock and I groaned quietly, struggling to find the strength to drag myself from the bed.

I crept down the stairs and peaked into the kitchen. Christopher paced furiously, holding his phone to his ear. It struck me odd that he was wearing only a pair of cotton pajama pants, and yet it was nearly nine o'clock. We both should be dressed and getting ready to head to campus by now. I hadn't been paying attention to his thoughts, but I could hear his hurried murmurs as he spoke into the phone. I stood just to the side of the doorway, watching and listening from the shadows, realizing in horror that he was talking to at least one of my sisters.

He stopped his pacing at once when he heard me gasp, wheeling around to face me. "Rose, she's awake, I need to go. Thank you." His eyes never left mine as he ended the call and dropped the phone on the table, crossing the room to stand in front of me. "Hey," he said quietly, taking me into his arms. "I didn't hear you get up."

My hands hung limp at my side as he folded me into his embrace. "You called Rosalie?" His arms tightened around me when he heard the tremble in my voice.

"Technically, no. I called Alice. Come, sit, love." I felt myself being led to one of the kitchen chairs. He sat down and pulled me into his lap. He sighed and stroked my head, running his hand along the length of my braided hair.

"So did she tell you then?" I mumbled against his chest.

He shifted a bit so he could look at my face. "I'm sorry?"

I blinked a few times, trying to hold in the new tears that were threatening. "Alice."

He rubbed his forehead anxiously. "No. She didn't answer, but Rosalie picked up when I called back a few moments later." His mouth twisted into a lopsided frown. "Alice and Jasper have gone away for a night or two, and didn't bring their phones." He shook his head. "Apparently everything looked clear to her before they left."

My top teeth pressed against my bottom lip. "Oh." I had wondered how she could have missed something like this, but I knew that if she and Jasper were really and truly alone there wasn't much else she would notice.

"Rosalie is worried about you, love," Christopher murmured, pulling me out of my thoughts. "I think Emmett's probably talking her out of flying down here and ripping out Phillips' throat."

My spine stiffened. "I never said he did anything." I squeezed my eyes shut as his hands gently cupped my face. He was going to wait until I looked at him again, and after several moments I relented and opened my eyes.

"Eleanor," he said sharply. "Are you telling me that nothing happened in your meeting yesterday? Because that's not what it seemed like last night."

His eyes widened in horror when he saw the tears flood my eyes, and I knew he was sorry for letting his frustration show. He cradled me against him again, rocking me and whispering apologies into my hair as I cried. "Darling, please, I love you. I need to know what he did. I want to help you but I don't know how." He let me cry until my tears ran out again, rocking me and rubbing my back as I clung to him.

"Ellie," he said after my sobs had mostly quieted. "Listen love, I understand if you can't talk about the details, but is it okay if I ask you some questions?" I nodded against him.

My arms started to shake as his first question formed in his mind. "Ellie, did he..." he swallowed, trying to keep control of his voice, "did he rape you?"

"No." The word was scarcely a whisper, but I could his muscles relax ever so slightly around me.

His lips pressed into my hair. "Did he threaten you?"

I chewed my lip. "Not exactly."

I felt the growl vibrate in his chest before the sound escaped from his throat. "What did he say?"

Again, it was all I could do to whisper my response. "That I..._owed_ him for my late admission." Christopher swore and he flexed his fingers away from me, curling them back slowly as he worked to control his anger.

"You said last night that you just sat there. What did that mean, love? Did he touch you?"

I twisted around, trying to wrench myself free from his arms. He loosened his grip, dropping his hands to my hips as I scooted forward in his lap, barely sitting on his knees now. I leaned over with my elbows on my own knees and my head in my hands. Suddenly, I heard myself talking, detailing every minute I spent in Dr. Phillip's office. I could feel the tension in Christopher's fingers as he stared into my back, straining to catch every babbled word.

"I don't know why I couldn't break away, Christopher," I choked, after I told him how Phillips had gripped my thigh, his fingers reaching higher beneath my skirt. "It was like everything just shut down. It wasn't until he tried to kiss me that I jerked back enough to shove him off of me." My hands balled into fists.

Christopher's hands slid up my back, squeezing my shoulders gently and then urging me to turn around again and face him. "What happened when you pushed him away?"

I shook my head, staring at his knuckles as his hand rested on my leg. "I wanted to kill him." I looked up at him, and I could hear in his thoughts how he was taken aback at my darkened expression. "Once I could finally move, it was all I could do to leave without actually breaking his neck."

Christopher breathed in and out for several long seconds, not breaking our intense stare. "I wouldn't have blamed you for one second if you had, Ellie. In fact, I would be more than happy to go take care of that myself, if you want."

Again I shook my head, placing my hand flat against his chest. "Please, don't. I don't know what I'm supposed to do right now, but I don't want to have to run from here."

He nodded and pulled me back to him, once again folding me into his arms. "Thank you for telling me, Ellie. I am so, so sorry."

"Chris?"

"Yes?"

"You know you're missing your class, right now, right?"

He chuckled. "Stephen is handling it for me today. Monday too, if we need it."

I groaned. "Fuck. How much does he know?"

When he didn't answer right away, I fought against his tight hold to lean back enough to see his face. He smiled sheepishly. "Sorry. I know I shouldn't have said anything - obviously he doesn't know details. But when I figured out it was Phillips that upset you so much yesterday I came down here ranting like a madman. Anyway, I think he suspects pretty much what happened, or worse. He's looking into...options."

"Options?"

Christopher sighed and pressed his forehead against mine. "Well, for one, I think you should file a report with the police, Ellie."

"Chris, no."

"Ellie, he assaulted you. He would have raped you. That is a _crime_. One he's no doubt committed before." I opened my mouth to argue but he held a finger against my lips. "But I know I might not be able to convince you to report it. However, we may be able to file a grievance through the school. He's apparently been suspended for this kind of thing before. Maybe this time they would actually _do _something."

I didn't reply, pressing my cheek against his chest and wishing I could stay like that forever and forget everything else.


	16. Anger

**EPOV**

At some point, I lost track of the minutes that ticked by as Christopher cradled me within his arms, shielding me from everything but my mind and his after I'd told him every revolting detail of what had transpired the previous day. He had been right before when he saw me huddled in his huge sweatshirt – I was hiding. I tucked myself into his chest, curled into the tightest ball I could manage; digging my heels into his thigh with my arms locked tightly around my knees. I pressed my forehead to my kneecaps and let my hair fall over both sides of my face.

When the count I'd kept of seconds into minutes finally escaped me, I started to count the gentle strokes of Christopher's hand over my head and down the length of my spine, struggling to avoid the thoughts that resonated so clearly in my mind. Under normal circumstances, he was extraordinarily talented at masking thoughts and ideas that he didn't necessarily want me to hear. But despite his efforts to relax and calm me, I could feel the tension rippling through him, and it was only so long before his unusual control began to wane.

His mind wondered back to the details I'd shared, and with his thoughts, came my own troubling memories. I shivered and started to try to free myself from his iron grip.

"You okay, love?" he whispered, tightening his hold.

I struggled against his arms until he got the message. "Yeah," I said weakly, "I just kind of want a little, um, space…if that's okay." His arms dropped from around me immediately.

"Okay." He realized that I'd probably been listening to his drifting thoughts, but he didn't press. "I will come check on you in a little while, all right?"

I tried to offer a small smile, running my fingers once through his hair before I climbed out of his lap and up the stairs.

* * *

**ChPOV**

I leaned back in my chair as I listened to Ellie's footsteps upstairs. I heard the mattress creak slightly as she crawled into bed, and the shift of the covers that I pictured her pulling up nearly over her head. I didn't move, or think – hell, I hardly _breathed_ – until I could be reasonably sure that she had indeed fallen asleep. I couldn't trust myself to control my raging thoughts while she was awake, and I was certain that was what had sent her fleeing from my arms before.

I paced the lower level of the house as she slept, checking on her every twenty minutes or so, or whenever I couldn't stand being away from her for a second more. She was sleeping soundly, curled into herself as tightly as she could manage – hiding even in her slumber. After my fifth venture upstairs to peak in on her, I turned around and stormed angrily down the stairs, struggling to swallow the rage building within my chest.

I wanted to kill him. The man thought he had the right to touch my wife, my love, my _mate_, without her permission. I couldn't stop the instinctive workings of my immortal mind from plotting his demise. I had never been one to kill sadistically, but I knew without a doubt if ever I had the opportunity to end this one human's life, I would enjoy it.

The vibration of my cellphone from within my pocket brought me out of my reverie. I glanced at the screen, expecting to see that it was Alice or another of my in-lawed family members calling to dissuade me from the choice I was contemplating. I thumbed across the screen, surprised to see the name that appeared instead.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Christopher, it's Stephen."

"Hi Stephen." I rubbed the bridge of my nose. "How are you?"

He chuckled darkly. "I'm fine. How are _you_?" He paused, clearing his throat, and adding quietly, "For that matter, how is Ellie?"

I sighed. "I'm…well, she's…" I pulled the phone down away from my mouth, staring at the wall for a moment as I tried to form an adequate answer.

"She told me what happened," I said after a long pause. "It's been a rough morning."

"Is she there right now? Do you need to go?"

"No, she went back upstairs. She's asleep."

"How bad is it? What did he do?"

I dragged my hand through my hair, explaining what Ellie had told me with as few details as possible. It was clear from his tense silence that he understood what had happened.

Stephen sucked in a long breath on the other end of the line. "Christopher," he said quietly, "she needs to report this."

An exasperated groan escaped my lips. "I know. I told her already that we need to file a police report, but so far she hasn't agreed to do that."

"Well, if nothing else, I did find out some information about what you can do from within the University. Do you have a minute to take all this down?"

I grabbed a pad of paper from a drawer in the kitchen, making notes as he detailed the internal grievance procedure for students and staff.

"Thanks, Stephan," I said when I'd taken down the information.

"Of course." He paused, and I could hear him fidgeting on the other end of the line. "Listen, I know this is between the two of you, but if she's going to do something she ought to do it soon. There's…_talk_. Already."

I bit down hard on my tongue to keep from growling into the phone. "Talk?"

Stephen sighed. "Yeah. Susanna popped into my office after your class this morning, asking where you were. I didn't tell her anything, but she shut the door and told me that her husband told _her_ that Marzen is making the rounds, talking about shenanigans between a professor and a student."

"That woman," I hissed, understanding now why Ellie and her fellow grad students called Patricia Marzen the Denver Dementor under their breaths. "I don't understand though. I thought she was in bed with Phillips, so to speak."

Stephen let out a hard chuckle. "Oh she is. She's not saying he _attacked_ a student. She's suggesting that a student – a grad student – came on to him."

My fist came down hard against the counter. "Goddamn it." I really might kill him now. Maybe Marzen too. After all, my immortal instincts argued within me, what's one more human? "She didn't come on to him, Stephen," I snarled angrily. "He assaulted her." It was getting harder to keep the growl out of my voice.

I could almost hear him raise his hands in surrender. "I know that, Chris. I do. The guy is sleaze and Patricia isn't any better. I just wanted to warn you."

I inhaled a long breath through my nose, trying to calm down enough to end this conversation. "Right. I appreciate your help, Stephen." Suddenly, I heard running water upstairs – Ellie must have gotten up. "Um, I think Ellie might be awake again, and I should probably fill her in on the latest. Thank you again for looking into all of this for me."

"No problem. You guys take care, and let me know if you need me to cover again on Monday." He hesitated once more. "One more thing, real quick. Michael has offered to help, you know, professionally."

I thought back to what I knew about his partner, vaguely remembering when Stephen told me a few weeks prior that Michael had just made partner at his firm in Denver.

"He thinks Ellie needs a lawyer? She hasn't done anything wrong, Stephen."

"I know that. But I'm afraid this is going to get worse before it gets better, and he's dealt with this kind of thing before. He can help, if you want."

I rubbed my chin, closing my eyes. "Okay, thank you both for your help. I will talk to Ellie and let you know if she wants to talk with him."

"If there's anything else we can do…"

"Thanks, Stephen."

I sat down at the kitchen table to read over my notes, scratching absently at the back of my head as I recalled what Stephen had told me. The table started to shake and I realized that I had clenched my fingers around the edge, causing the heavy oak to begin to buckle. I relaxed my grip, curling my fingers into a fist in my lap.

After a few minutes, I thought that I had calmed down enough to go check on Ellie again – if she was feeling up to it I would go over what Stephen had found out, and hopefully she would be persuaded to take some action. The longer we waited to do anything, I reasoned to myself, the more difficult it would be to act later; and the more likely that I might end up dealing with Phillips on my own.

I shook off the thought as I climbed the stairs. When I peaked into the bedroom, I was surprised to find Ellie sitting up on the bed, hunched over her laptop and typing furiously. She didn't acknowledge me as I stood in the doorway, punching the keys with a few last angry strokes before swirling her finger across the mouse-pad. After a few taps of her fingertips, she looked up at me through thick lashes.

I smiled. "What are you up to, love?"

She shrugged, turning the laptop toward me. "I wrote out everything that happened and emailed it to myself; and to you."

My eyebrows slowly climbed higher on my forehead. "Oh?" This had been one of Stephen's suggestions. "I thought you were sleeping."

Her lips twitched and she shook her head. "Not really." She stretched her arms above her head as I stepped toward her and glanced down at the computer.

"May I?"

She nodded, pulling her knees back up to her chest. I could feel her eyes on me as I read – it was almost word-for-word what she'd told me earlier. I took a deep breath, struggling to keep my rage contained before I met her gaze.

"So what does this mean? I assume you heard…everything else Stephen said?"

Ellie looked down at the blankets crumpled beneath her, chewing her lip. "Yeah, I heard."

"So, what do you want to do?"

She shrugged. "I don't know."

I hissed and clicked the laptop closed, shoving it aside. "What do you mean, you don't know?"

"What do _you_ mean? I. Don't. Know." She scrambled out of the bed and started to pace the room with her arms crossed across her chest. "I just want to forget about it."

I growled in frustration. "Ellie, you can't just forget it. They're not going to let you. Don't you see what they're doing? You didn't give him what he wanted so they are going to try and smear your name."

Her eyes narrowed. "You mean _your_ name."

It suddenly felt like the air had been sucked out of the room. "Excuse me?"

She arched an eyebrow. "I told you I heard everything Stephen said. And I heard what you were thinking before he called. You're upset that some guy that isn't you put his hands on your woman and now people are going to be talking about how your wife is fucking around with somebody else."

I stared at her, confusion warring with irritation that suddenly I had become the target of her anger. "Ellie, love, I'm not sure what I've done to piss you off, here. Yes I am angry about everything you said, and _yes_ I think you need to do something to make sure Phillips gets punished. I'm not sure why that's a bad thing. We should be filing charges against him, and requesting an inquiry from the dean. There's no reason – _none – _that he should he allowed to get away with this."

She threw her hands up and immediately let them fall back, smacking her hips with a loud crack. "But it's not _your_ decision! I don't _want_ that spectacle!"

"So what are you going to do then? Quit?"

Her brows pulled together and her head tilted. "Quit? No! I am going to go on like I was before. I'm going to go to my classes on Monday, teach my writing class on Tuesday and go _on with my life_."

"You will keep working, for _him_? Stay in his class?"

Again her arms shot out to her sides, palms up; her shoulders pulling up in a sharp shrug before she turned her back and resumed pacing.

"Like hell you are, Eleanor."


	17. Lashing Out

**EPOV**

"Like hell you are, Eleanor."

I whirled around on my heel. "Are you giving me an ultimatum, Christopher?" I could feel my heart pounding in my chest and my nostrils flared with anger. My hands balled into fists at my side. Somewhere in the back of my brain it registered that I hadn't been this furious with him since the day I stormed his office at Cornell.

When he didn't answer, I stepped closer. "Well?" I growled. His eyes widened in surprise.

"You can't be serious, Ellie," he fumed. "You honestly think I would be okay with you being anywhere _near_ him after what he did? After what you told me? What if next time you just shut down completely?"

"So it's my fault then? He touched me because I _let_ him? Because I didn't react quickly enough? What if he _had_ raped me? What then Chris?!"

"I'm not going to let you near him if I can't be sure that you can protect yourself Eleanor."

His voice was as cold and even as his controlled expression; it only made me angrier.

"You're not going to _let_ me? When did you become my father?!" I shrieked. "Jesus Christ, Christopher! I don't need a protector right now, I _need_ my husband!"

I pushed past him and ran down the stairs. By the time I reached the bottom, a flood of tears had started to fall from my eyes, blocking my vision. I pressed on toward the back door, shoving it open and stepping outside. I scrubbed my eyes clear and sat down with my legs hanging over the edge of the deck, stripping off the sweatshirt and tossing it aside. My head hurt from the tight braid, so I yanked the rubber band from the end and ran my fingers through the plaited strands.

It wasn't long before I heard Christopher's measured steps as he descended the stairs, and the soft click of the back door as he closed it behind him. He took several long strides across the deck, leaving a couple of feet between us as he sat, mirroring my position. I squeezed my eyes closed as he ran his hand through his hair.

"I took vows, Ellie."

He spoke softly, and the words echoed in my head for a moment, as if I'd imagined them. I sniffed and rubbed my hands across my eyes again. "What?"

"I took vows. To you. To myself." I braved a glance in his direction, and his expression was so broken I couldn't catch my breath. "I will love you, honor you, and cherish you every day just like I promised, but damn it Ellie, in my head I am not living up to those things if I can't keep you safe. This isn't just some antiquated notion to me; protecting you is part of being your husband, just like protecting me is part of being my wife."

I gaped at him, snorting in disbelief. "How on earth would _I _protect _you_?" I scoffed, shaking my head and staring back off into the mountains.

Christopher reached across the space between us and slid his hand under mine, linking our fingers. "You do, Ellie. You protect my heart – you made it yours. You protect my soul – you taught me how to live a better life. You showed me that I could be worthy of love – and not just anyone's, but _yours_. You absolutely protect me, Eleanor."

My hair whipped across my face as I tried to look at him. "It's not the same," I mumbled, fighting against the wind for control of my wild strands. "I never told you to change anything."

He smiled and shook his head. "Not the point, love."

I pulled my hand back and leaned my elbows against my legs, covering my face with my hands. "Then what is the point Christopher? That in order for someone to love me I have to be a damned damsel all the time? You can't always be there to protect me."

I chanced another glanced at him as he hissed out a breath, squaring his shoulders. "Ellie, I don't think anyone who knows you would _ever_ consider calling you a damsel. And believe me, I know I can't _always_ protect you. But I will be damned if I'm not going to try."

"Don't you see, though? That's what's wrong here! We're not talking about a real danger that I should even need protection from! We're talking about a human, Chris; a weak, mortal, _human_. I know I'm not a true immortal, a full vampire; but I am sure as hell strong enough to keep myself from being hurt by a _human_!"

The lines on his face once again mapped the confusion in his mind as he tried to understand me. "I know that, Ellie. But let's not forget, Vic…"

"Victoria was different." I cut him off with a quick wave of my hand. "Though even _that_ was a colossal failure on my part. I'm a fucking mind reader! And I totally missed that she was about to ambush us." I growled in disgust. "But _this_? What excuses have I for letting this horrible man put his hands on me? How in the hell did that happen? Why couldn't I fight him off, Chris?"

I shifted to my knees as I ranted, my arms flailing wildly before my palms slapped back down onto my thighs. My nails dug into my skin through the thin yoga pants. "How can I protect _your_ heart when I can't even be trusted to protect my own body?"

He watched in horror as my shoulders started to shake, and I could hear the click in his mind as he finally began to understand. His memories flashed back to what I'd said before. _"I just sat there. I could have flicked my fingers and sent him flying across the desk but I could _not move._"_

His arms were around me at once. "Eleanor Elizabeth Cullen Dawling," he punctuated each name with a soft kiss to my forehead. "Is that what all this is about? Do you think this was your fault?"

I sniffed and buried my face against his neck, taking comfort in the chill from his skin against my cheek as he cradled me against him. "I let it happen," I whispered. "I keep waiting for you to realize that."

He leaned back away from me, holding my face in his hands and waiting until my eyes opened and met his gaze. "Darling, I should not have to tell _you_, my beautiful telepathic wife, that I do not think that you _let_ this happen. There is not one cell in my body that believes that any of this is your fault."

I snorted and shook my head. "Just because I haven't heard you think doesn't mean anything. You're good at hiding stuff."

"No, Eleanor. Not stuff like this. Please hear me, love. I do _not_ think that you are responsible for any of this."

I could feel his sincerity in his words and his mind, but the trembling in my body refused to cease. "But what if…" I swallowed, "what if I didn't…you know. Stop him?"

He let his mind wander for a fraction of a section, swallowing back venom and shaking his head, pulling me back to him so that my head was tucked back under his chin. "Ellie, please don't torture yourself like this."

"You're not the only one who took vows, Chris," I sobbed, suddenly gasping for breath. "That's what finally got me to snap out of it, I think. I just kept thinking that if he got any further, you…you wouldn't…"

* * *

**ChPOV**

Ellie's words quickly became garbled by her panicked sobs, and I desperately searched my brain for something I could say or do to calm her. Without thinking, I grabbed her face in my hands again and pressed my lips to hers, silencing her rant with one gentle kiss. She froze for a moment, and I carefully combed my fingers through her hair and watched her, looking for any sign that the impulsive move had been over the line. She leaned her forehead against mine, taking a series of deep breaths, each one longer and slower than the one before it.

As her heart rate finally began to slow, her fingers sought out my face, lightly pushing my hair back from my eyes as hers opened wide. Her fingers slipped back further into my hair, and her face tilted slightly; lips parted. I could hear her heart pounding again from within her chest – but this time, it was a different tension radiating from her.

I didn't move as she leaned in closer; I didn't want to push her for more than she might be ready for. Her other hand closed over mine where it still rested against her cheek. Her breath feathered across my face before her lips brushed mine with a sweet, timid whisper of a touch.

She smiled a little as she pulled away, her teeth brushing over her lower lip. I raised an eyebrow as I watched her. She nodded, granting the permission I was seeking and leaned closer again. This time when our lips touched she melted against me, wrapping her arms around my neck.

It only took a few moments before the strain between us began to ease, leaving in its place a slow-burning fire that grew with every delicate pass of her tongue against mine, each scrape of my teeth against her lips, and the scratch of her nails down my back. I slid my hands beneath her thin camisole, forcing myself to keep them still and resisting the urge to slide my fingers across all of the silken skin beneath the fabric.

I knew she had rediscovered her courage when her fingers drifted lower along my back, dipping beneath the waistband of my pants. As much as I wanted to lose myself in the feeling of her hands over my skin, I eased back from her, pressing a few more soft kisses to first her lips, and then the corner of her mouth. Her chest heaved and she looked at me with her head still cocked to the side, uncertainty hiding behind her clear blue eyes.

"Chris, did I do something wrong?" She tried to hide it, but I could see the tears from the perceived rejection starting form.

"Oh love, no, not at all." I pulled her back for a tight hug. "It's just…I was wondering if you were hungry?" It had occurred to me during her frantic tirade earlier that I had no idea when she'd last eaten, and it had been days since we'd hunted together. "Would you be interested in going for a hunt?"

She worried her lip again, and I couldn't help but cup her face with one hand, using my thumb to pry the skin from beneath her teeth. "What do you think, love? It's been a while since you've hunted right?" She sighed and turned so her nose brushed my palm, taking in a deep breath.

"Yes," she whispered.

I kissed her forehead. "Okay, let's go."

Ellie set our pace as we ran from the house. Her eyes were narrowed in concentration, her face twisted into an expression that I struggled to understand. When we came upon a pair of mountain lions she skidded to a stop so suddenly I thought she might startle the animals that hadn't yet realized we were there. She braced herself with her palms against a huge rock, taking several deep breaths to collect herself.

"Ellie?"

I extended my hand toward her; unsure whether I should try to help or leave her be. She held up her hand, and so I waited. Another few seconds passed and then her eyes flashed open.

This time, I could see the predator rising from within as her gaze locked on her target. She sprang toward the lion, tackling it with ease and grace; draining it swiftly. She was at once delicate and lethal, the perfect embodiment of humanity and immortality, beauty and beast.

Watching her, I almost forgot to go after the other animal until she flashed a sated smile and nodded toward it as it fled.

When I found her again a few minutes later, she was sitting with her legs dangling over a cliff, her palms pressed into the earth as she peered over the edge. Her arms glimmered ever so slightly in the sunlight.

She gnawed on her bottom lip, shooting a glance at me through her lashes as I sat down beside her. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I was so beyond out of line earlier…"

"Don't." I shook my head. "It's forgotten."

"No, Chris. I shouldn't have lashed out like that. I guess I just felt like if I couldn't make myself understand that I didn't…you know, _let_ him do those things, then how on earth could _you_ think it wasn't my fault." I opened my mouth to argue, but she put her hand over my lips.

"No, I understand what you said before, really I do. Intellectually I know I didn't do anything wrong, but…" she swallowed a lump in her throat, and looked back up at me again. "When you were talking about vows, before? I felt like I had already broken them."

My heart broke for her as she whispered those last words. "Oh, baby, no. No." I slid closer, took her under my arm and kissed her head. "You were attacked. You were not unfaithful."

"But what if he'd…?"

"Stop it, Ellie. Please stop. I won't pretend that I'm not thanking every deity I can think of that he didn't…I can't even imagine how anyone could want to do that kind of harm to you – or to anyone. I would do anything to spare you that, love. It's not about being jealous, or possessive; it's because I love you so much that anything that hurts you hurts me."

I took a deep breath, pressing my forehead against her hair. "But I realize that my anger and my feelings are entirely secondary to yours – you were right before. How we move forward from this – that's not my decision, love. I'm sorry if you've felt pressured to make a decision that you should never be faced with in the first place."

I bent my head to kiss her bare shoulder, smiling against her skin as she sighed and melted against me. I left another gentle kiss on her skin, followed by another, and then another; as she leaned her head back, arching her neck toward me.

"You may blend in with the humans with ease, love, but you need never feel vulnerable to them." I pressed my lips against the sensitive skin just below her ear. "You are magnificent and strong," a nip on her earlobe, "and we will handle this however you think is best."

Her head turned toward me, and I could have sworn her blue eyes darkened as she laid her hand against my face. The warmth of her skin seared straight through me, reigniting the need smoldering deep within me as the predator within her rose again.

"Christopher," she whispered, "take me home."


	18. A Respite

**EPOV**

"You should answer your phone, darling."

The insistent path of Christopher's lips on my skin as he traced patterns of kisses and licks along my collarbone, between my breasts and down to my belly button contradicted his words. I sighed and scratched my nails against his scalp, giggling when he looked up with a grin. He climbed back up so his face hovered over mine, settling himself back between my legs. I reached between us, arching my brow.

"You are making quite the compelling argument for ignoring it, love." My hand emphasized my point further, closing around his stiffening cock as I spoke. I watched his face, delighting in the way his teeth buried in his lip and his eyes rolled backward. His hips rolled forward and he groaned as my fingers gave a gentle squeeze as they slid along his length.

I bent my knees, sliding one foot back along the sheets and winding my other leg around his hip, inviting him to press into me. His eyes searched mine as he held himself at my entrance, wordlessly seeking my permission.

I answered with what had become my whispered refrain throughout this night. "Please, baby."

I didn't understand what he'd been waiting for after he ran back to the house so many hours before with me in his arms, first cradled against him, then with my body pressed flush against his; my arms and legs wound around him. Even as he ran, our lips never parted and my hands never stopped seeking purchase in his hair, along the skin of his back, his neck, and his shoulders.

When we finally reached our bed, he laid me on the covers but resisted my attempts to pull him down with me. I'd been frantic with need - I knew he'd felt how I'd soaked through the flimsy fabric that separated us as I ground against his stomach. Still he hesitated, kneeling beside me with the strangest look of uncertainty on his face.

"Christopher," I moaned, "please, baby." He smiled and leaned over me, his lips soft on mine for only a moment before he was quickly swept up in the heat of our mutual need.

He pushed in with a low groan, and the feeling his body filling mine brought my mind immediately back to the present. He dropped his head, pressing his cheek against mine as our hips slowly moved together. His cool breath on my neck was a sharp contrast to the warmth that spread from deep within me.

The sensation, combined with the scratch of the slight stubble that eternally shadowed his face across my skin, caused goose bumps to rise along my arms and sent a shiver down my spine. My fingers twisted in his hair and dug into his ass as I rocked my hips against his. He slid his arms under me, holding tight and rolling to his back, not breaking our steady rhythm. I sat up over him, placing my hands on his stomach as I rode him, feeling his abdominal muscles flex and release.

His hands gripped my hips tightly and I pushed myself back up again, my head falling back he increased his speed, hitting my clit with every thrust of his hips. Even with my eyes closed, I could see through his mind that his eyes were trained on my breasts.

I missed the feel of his chest against mine, so I grabbed his forearms and leaned back, urging him to sit up with me. He understood what I wanted immediately, sitting up and pulling me tightly against him with his hands against my back. I arched my back, pushing my chest out further as he slid one hand down to grab my ass firmly. His hand dragged slowly up my side, his fingers pressing into my skin. He grabbed one breast and lowered his mouth to suck my nipple between his teeth.

I yanked on his hair as his teeth tugged on the sensitive peak. "Fuck," I groaned as he bit down hard, my hips jerking frantically in response. His other hand dropped to my ass, squeezing and holding me still as his thrusts picked up in speed and strength. I grabbed his hands and pulled them from my hips, not willing to cede control. I pushed on his shoulders and he let himself fall back against the bed, biting my lip as my mouth found his again. I gripped the crumpled sheets on either side of his head, and his hands ran through my hair as it fell over us as my body rocked frantically over his.

Every thrust of his hips against mine was met with a rough grunt, and I could feel the tightening in his muscles as my thighs gripped his waist. He freed one of his hands from my hair, reaching between us to touch my clit and pressed his index and middle fingers against the pulsing nub, circling it rapidly in time with our movements.

"Come with me baby," he moaned, pinching his fingers together. My muscles seized and I cried out as I came around him, spurring him over edge as his own climax took hold. Both of his hands tangled in my hair as his body stiffened; he held my face to his, keeping me captured in a bruising kiss as his body shook beneath me. He kept hold of my head, holding me carefully to him as he rolled to his side, bringing me with him. His kisses became gentle and sweet, his tongue sweeping over my lips to soothe the now-swollen skin.

His grip loosened slightly when I finally tried to turn my head to take at least a few full breaths after inhaling only through small gasps for so long. I closed my eyes and breathed in and out slowly, opening them after the slight lightheaded sensation cleared from my head. When my eyes opened again, his lip was quirked up in amusement and he reached over to stroke my cheek with the back of his left hand as I lay my head back across his bicep.

"You okay there, love?"

I pursed my lips, pretending to scowl at him. "You made me dizzy." I poked him once in the chest, and he caught my hand in his, bringing it to his mouth to kiss my fingers.

His arm shook under my head as he chuckled. "You're welcome." He rolled again, shifting to his back and holding his arms out to me. "Come here, please."

I crawled over to him, cuddling against his side and resting my head against his chest. He sighed with contentment as he wrapped his arms around me. "I love you," I whispered, reaching up to kiss his neck and curling my tongue over his skin, tracing upward to his jaw. He shuddered but held me still, stroking my hair as he shifted me back to his chest.

"I love you too, but you need to sleep, darling." My eyes glanced over to the clock on the table; it was nearly five a.m.

I giggled. "There are more important things than sleep." My fingers lightly danced over his sternum, slowly sliding lower, feeling the muscles in his abdomen tighten at my touch, and the soft hair that trailed below. His hand caught mine; bringing it back up to the middle his chest as the yawn I tried to hold in finally escaped. "Fine," I whispered, as my eyelids grew heavy. "Maybe a little sleep."

* * *

**ChPOV**

I opened my eyes when Ellie's phone started to ring for the seventh time since she'd fallen asleep that morning. Careful not to disturb her, I reached over to the bedside table to grab the device. I had already turned the sound of the ringer off for fear she would wake, but the constant buzzing of the vibrate mode was starting to irritate me.

I glanced at the name on the screen as I ignored the call; _Esme Cullen_. Tossing it back on the table with a sigh, I ran my fingers gently through Ellie's tangled hair. She would have to call her family when she woke.

"I don't wanna," she mumbled, shoving her hair back from her face and stretching. She rolled over, pulling my arm around her so that I would roll with her. I obliged, pressing my chest against her back.

I stroked my fingers along her arm. "Does that mean you're awake?"

"No. Sleeping." She wiggled closer, yanking her hair out from under her shoulder and causing half of it to fall on my face. "Oops." She giggled as I blew out a puff of air and brushed the strands away from my eyes, nose and mouth. I gently twisted her hair and draped it cover her shoulder.

"Your hair needs its own zip code," I grumbled, playfully pinching her bum. She laughed into her pillow, before lying still with her eyes squeezed shut. "Are you _faking_ sleep now, Ellie?"

Her body quivered against me with her attempt to suppress a new fit of giggles. "I think you've noticed, my love, that I don't fake _any_thing with you." She rolled to face me; snaking one of her arms around my neck and touching my cheek with her other hand.

I raised an eyebrow as I studied her contemplative expression. I ran my thumb over her lips, dropping a kiss on her forehead. "What are you thinking about?"

She sighed, twirling a lock of my hair around her finger. "It's Sunday, isn't it?"

"Yes."

I watched her as she gnawed apprehensively on her lower lip. "So, then, tomorrow's Monday."

Again, I answered simply, "Yes."

Ellie sighed once more, pressing her teeth into the delicate skin of her lip a few more times before she finally looked back up, meeting my gaze.

"So, we should probably talk."

"Probably."

Neither of us spoke for a moment; her lip twisted up on one side. "You're going to make me do this, huh?"

I disentangled myself from her arms, sitting up and leaning back against the headboard. "Ellie, I'm not going to _make_ you do anything." I raised my hands with my palms facing outward. "No ultimatums here, honestly." I raised my eyebrows and held her gaze in mine until I was sure she believed me. "But, I need your direction here. What do _you_ want to do?"

She sat up as well, the sheet pinned down against her chest by her arms. Her shoulders pulled up into a shrug. "I don't know," she whispered, shrinking back from me. I knew she was thinking back to our argument the last time this subject came up.

"Ellie…"

She shook her head. "Hang on, I'm thinking." Her head tilted to the side as she silently regarded me through narrowed eyes for several moments. I watched, both perplexed and amused, trying not to interrupt her thoughts with my own. "Christopher," she said quietly at last. "Can I ask you something?"

It was my turn to cock my head to the side. "Of course." I waited, and she chewed her lip.

"Um Okay. So earlier, when we were having sex? It seemed like you were…" she paused, wrinkling her nose as she tried to find a word. I waited patiently, not sure where she was leading. She took a deep breath. "Hesitant. At times you seemed hesitant."

"Hesitant?" I repeated; it was not a word I would have typically used to describe our sex life.

She smiled at my unspoken postscript. "Nor would I, Chris. In fact it's probably not the right word now. It was like…you wanted permission, I guess."

I leaned my head back against the headboard and glanced toward the ceiling. "Ah." I looked back at her expectant face and shrugged. "I suppose that's accurate. After everything we had talked about before, I just wanted to make sure that you were okay; that you knew you can always tell me no."

Her brows rose in surprise. "Tell you no?" She snorted. "I thought I made it pretty clear what I wanted on the run back here." I chuckled, unconsciously running my hand over my stomach at the reminder of the feeling of her searing heat pressed against me.

"You most certainly did. But if it had been too much…" I dragged my fingers through my hair and offered an uneven grin. "Clearly it wasn't. I just wanted you to know that this," I waved my index finger between the two of us, "this is us. Always. I don't ever want you to feel like I don't respect you as an equal in this relationship, love, because I do. I know I go a little berserk when I think something might hurt you – and I can't promise that I will always be able to rein that in, but I trust you."

Her eyes widened as she processed my words, and I reached for her hand, needing to feel her. She drew in a shaky breath and stared down at where our fingers were now linked. "So, if I want to go back tomorrow…?"

I squeezed her hand. "Then that's what we will do."


End file.
